:: SPOZ's RANT ::

The Adelaide music scene: to many of you it might be little more than a touring speed bump between Melbourne and Perth but to us it's a way of life. Feast within, on all its dysfunctioning splendour, as we bring you the highly satirical, laughingly fictional and intellectually imbecile tales from our rock & roll wasteland...
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[::..latest blogs..::]
:: FILTHY LUCRE,
WHITE SUMMER,
SOMNIUM and
HEINOUS CRIMES
:: FLEUR GREEN
& THE KEEPERS
(Album Launch)
with EMILY DAVIS
:: JUNGLE CITY
and SOMNIUM,
CAPTAIN HELLFIRE
& THE WRETCHED
BRETHREN, SURVIVING
SHARKS and BITCHSPAWN
(Halloween 2017)
:: NAOMI KEYTE,
TOM WEST and
BREE TRENTER,
and LITTLE CAPTAIN
(Single Launch)
:: ALANA JAGT &
THE MONOTREMES
(EP Launch) with
ALISON COPPE &
THE JANES and KORAL
:: HALL OF FAME ::
:: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES** :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ARTAX MISSION :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND* :: BOOSTER :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CIRCLE CLAN :: COERCE :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: CONCHILLIA :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: DOUBLE HANDED* :: THE DUNES :: EGYPT :: ENCARTA / COLONEL KERNEL** :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA FIRE!*** :: FRIENDS :: GLASS SKIES :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT* :: THE HONEY PIES** :: HORROR MY FRIEND* :: ISLE OF VISION :: JUNGLE CITY :: KAMIKAZE :: THE KEEPSAKES* :: THE KILLGIRLS*** :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: LADY STRANGELOVE** :: LEADER CHEETAH* :: LIKE LEAVES** :: LUMONICS* :: LYLA :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS*** :: MERE THEORY :: MORALS OF A MINOR* :: THE MOTIVE :: MR WEDNESDAY** :: NO THROUGH ROAD*** :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: REALIST FEW :: RIDE INTO THE SUN** :: THE SEA THIEVES* :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS* :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY*** :: SKELETONS :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE* :: SONS OF ZOKU :: SPARKSPITTER* :: SQUEAKER :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: STEERING BY STARS* :: SWIMMING :: TEA :: THE TIMBERS :: TONY FONT SHOW** :: TRACER :: THE TRANSATLANTICS** :: TWO SUNS :: TYGER TYGER* :: THE VILLENETTES* :: WEST THEBARTON BROTHEL PARTY :: WOLF & CUB** :: ZETA ::
[::..rant awards..::]
:: 2008 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2009 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2010 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2011 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
:: RECOMMENDED ::
[::..global..::]
:: NME
:: SPIN
[::..local..::]
[::..blogosphere..::]
[::..miscellaneous..::]
:: XKCD
:: SITE FEATURES ::
[::..video blogs..::]
[::..festival blogs..::]
:: Fringe Festival 2012
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2013
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2015
- 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 |
5
| 6 | 7 | 8
:: Fringe Festival 2017
- 1 |
2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
[::..b&w episodes..::]
:: A Winter Wonderland
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
:: In Limbo - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7
:: B&W July 2012 - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8
[::..special features..::]
:: ARTIST INDEX ::
:: !!! :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES (DUET) :: 200 MOTELS :: 4 KINGS LOUD :: 4 VOICE :: 67 SPECIAL :: 78 SAAB :: A.B. ORIGINAL :: A BASKET OF MAMMOTHS :: A.D.K.O.B. :: A RED DAWN :: AAARRR! ALL ABOARD FOR PIRATEY VARIETY :: AARON THOMAS :: AARON THOMAS TRIO :: ABBEY HOWLETT :: ABBEY HOWLETT & THE GOLDEN REALM :: ABLACKWELL :: ABOLISHED :: ACID MOUNTAIN :: ACROSS THE ATLAS :: ADALITA :: ADAM PAGE :: ADELAIDE'S PIPE GUY :: ADNAAN BARAKY :: ADRIAN BELEW :: ADRIAN DEUTSCH :: AFFAIRS OF MEN :: AFI :: AFTER THE FALL :: AIRBOURNE :: ALANA JAGT :: ALANA JAGT & THE MONOTREMES :: ALARM BIRDS & THE SEA THIEVES :: ALIAS & THE JAMS :: ALISON COPPE & THE JANES :: ALITHIA :: ALL FLIGHT CREW ARE DEAD :: ALL MADE OF RUBIES :: ALL NIGHT GIRLS :: ALMA KALORAMA :: ALPEN :: ALPHA BETA FOX :: ALPHABETTE :: ALPINE :: ALUKA :: AMBUSH MARKETING :: THE AMCATS :: AMUNDSENS FLAG :: ANDREW HIGGS & THE SAND CASTLE HARUM :: ANDREW P. STREET :: ANDY BULL :: ANDY ROBERTS :: ANGEL & THE BADMAN :: ANGEL EYES :: ANGEL OLSEN :: ANGELIK :: ANGELS OF GUNG-HO :: ANGIE HART :: ANIMAL SHADOWS :: ANIMAL TRAPS :: ANNIE BASS :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ANNY DUFF :: ANTHONY ANT :: ANTHONY WIGNALL :: ANTONY OF THE FUTURE :: ANYA ANASTASIA :: ANYA ANASTASIA & THE BIRD WIZDOM CABARET :: ANYA MCNICOL-WINDRAM :: THE APE :: APHELION :: APPARITION :: APPOMATTOX RUN :: ARAKEYE :: THE ARCADE FIRE :: ARCHERS :: ARCHIE :: ARCHITECTURE IN HELSINKI :: ARGUS & THE LIAR :: ARIEL PINK'S HAUNTED GRAFFITI :: ARLO COOK :: ARMOUR FOU :: ARRAY :: ART OF ESCAPE :: THE ART OF FLYING KITES :: ARTAX MISSION :: AS THE PENNY DROPS :: THE ASTEROID BELT :: THE ATLANTIC STREET BAND :: ATLASIS & AMICA :: ATTILA MY HONEY :: ATTONBITUS :: AUBERON DANCE ACADEMY :: AUDIUM :: THE AUDREYS :: AUGUSTE :: AURA FORM :: AURORA :: THE AUTHENTIC REPLICAS :: AUXILLA :: AVANT GARDENERS :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: AWKWARD LOVE TRIANGLE :: BABES ARE WOLVES :: BABYLON BURNING :: BACHELOR OF ARTS :: BACHELORETTE :: BACK$EAT ROMEOS :: BAD//DREEMS :: BAD LUCK CABARET :: THE BAKER SUITE :: THE BAKER'S DIGEST :: BAKEWELL STREET :: BALL PARK MUSIC :: BANG! BANG! AIDS! :: BANJO JACKSON :: BANJO WEATHERALD :: BANOFFEE :: BARCODE :: THE BARON :: THE BARONS OF TANG :: BASEBALL :: THE BASKERVILLES :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: BAT FOR LASHES :: BATPISS :: BATRIDER :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BATTLEHOUNDS :: BATTLE POPE :: BATTLES :: BEACH HOUSE :: BEANIE MY FRIEND :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND :: THE BEARDS :: THE BEASTIE BOYS :: BEC STEVENS :: BED WETTER :: BEDHEAD :: THE BEDROOM PHILOSOPHER & HIS AWKWARDSTRA :: THE BEERBELLY BUSKERS :: BEFORE THE AFTERMATH :: BELITTLE LEAGUE :: THE BELLE CURVE :: THE BELLRAYS :: BELOVED ELK :: BEN GEL & THE BONEYARD SAINTS :: BEN ELY'S RADIO 5 :: BEN REVI :: BEN REVI ALL-STAR REVIVAL BAND :: BERMUDA BAY :: BETTY AIRS :: BIG BAD BARRY & THE DEAD SETS :: BIG DADDY'S DISCOTHEQUE :: BIG RICHARD INSECT :: BIG SCARY :: BIG SKY THEORY :: BIG YAWN :: BILLY BISHOP GOES TO WAR :: BILLY BOB'S BBQ JAM BAND :: BING GOES TO MONACO :: BINKY & THE BUNG MICS :: THE BIRD :: BIRD WIZDOM :: BIRTHGLOW :: BIT BY BATS :: BITCH PREFECT :: BITCHSPAWN :: THE BITTER DARLINGS :: BITTER SWEET KICKS :: BJORK :: BLACK GOLD :: BLACK LIPS :: BLACKCHORDS :: THE BLACK AND WHITE :: BLACK CORAL :: THE BLACK DOVES :: THE BLACK HEART DEATH CULT :: BLACK KNIGHT :: BLAKE SABAN 3 :: BLAST RHOMBUS :: THE BLEEDING FLARES :: BLEEDING KNEES CLUB :: THESE BLESSED BONES :: THE BLIND HERD :: BLISTERED PALMS :: BLOOD PLASTIC :: BLOODHOUNDS ON MY TRAIL :: BLOW UP BETTY :: THE BLUEBERRIES :: BLUEJUICE :: BLUSH RESPONSE :: BOB DOWNE :: BOB LOG III :: BODY HORROR :: BOHOEFFER :: THE BON SCOTTS :: BOOSTER :: THE BORDERLAND :: BOS :: THE BOTTLEROCKETS :: BOX ELDER :: THE BOX ROCKETS :: BREE TRANTER :: BRENDAWG & THE DROID :: THE BRIAN JONESTOWN MASSACRE :: BRIANNA MAHONEY :: BRIARS :: BRILLIG :: BRITISH INDIA :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS (DUO) :: BRONZE CHARIOT :: BROKEN SOCIAL SCENE :: BROKERS :: THE BROTHERS GOON :: BROTHERSISTER :: THE BROUHAHA :: BRUNATEX :: BUFFALO BOYFRIEND :: THE BUMBLEBEEZ :: BURAKA SOM SISTEMA :: BURIED FEATHER :: BURLESQUE BEAUTIES :: BURN THE ASHES :: THE BURNING SEA :: BURNING TOWER :: BURNSIDE MUMS :: BUSHIDO :: BUSTER FIDEZ :: BYE BYE MOUNTAIN :: THE BYZANTINES :: CABBAGE & KINGS :: CABIN CULTS :: CAL WILLIAMS JNR :: CALIFORNIA COUSIN :: CALLERDENIGHT :: CALLING ALL CARS :: CAM GOODALL :: CAMEROM MCTERNAN :: CAMP COPE :: CANDIDA :: CANIDAE :: CANIS VULPES :: CAPTAIN CLEANOFF :: CAPTAIN HELLFIRE & THE WRETCHED BRETHREN :: THE CAPTAINS OF INDUSTRY :: CAPTIVES :: CAR SEAT HEADREST :: CARLA LIPPIS & THE MARTIAL HEARTS :: THE CASIO BROTHERS :: CASKET CASE :: CASS McCOMBS :: CASSETTE KIDS :: CAT DOG BIRD :: CAT PARTY :: CELESTITE :: CENTAURZ :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CERES :: CESARE :: CHAPMAN STREET :: CHARLIE MONSOON :: CHASING PHOENIX :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CHERRY GRIND :: THE CHEVRON WHORES :: CHÉRIE DE KLERK :: CHILD :: CHILDREN COLLIDE :: CHINESE NEW YEAR :: CHRIS FINNEN :: CHORAL GRIEF :: CHVRCHES :: CIARAM GRANGER :: CIRCLE CLAN :: CIRCUS ARCADE :: THE CITRADELS :: CITRUS JAM :: CITY CALM DOWN :: CITY RIOTS :: THE CLANGERS :: CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH :: THE CLIQUE :: CLOUD CONTROL :: CLOUD NOTHINGS :: THE CLOWNS OF DECADENCE :: CLUE TO KALO :: COBRA :: COCK :: COERCE :: COG :: COLLARBONES :: COLLIDE/ESCAPE :: COLLIDER :: COLONEL KERNEL :: COLORBLIND :: COLOURISE :: CONCHILLIA :: CONSOLE WARRIORS :: COOKIE BAKER :: COOKIE BAKER & HER SPECIAL SECRET SPELLS :: COOL JUMPER :: COOL JUMPER & TANTIVY FAIR :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: CORPUS :: CORTEZ :: COSMO BLACK :: COSMO THUNDERCAT :: COSMO THUNDERCAT (DUO) :: COUNTERFEIT TRAITOR :: COY CARP :: CRACKWHORE :: THE CRAVES :: THE CRAYON FIELDS :: CREEPERS :: CRUSTY SUITCASE BAND :: THE CRYING GAME :: CUB SCOUTS :: CURSES :: CUT COPY :: CUT OFF YOUR HANDS :: THE DAIRY BROTHERS :: DAISY BUCHANAN :: DAIYE SPA :: DALLAS FRASCA :: DALLI :: DAMN ARMS :: DAMN TERRAN :: DAMNED MEN :: DAMO SUZUKI NETWORK :: DAN DEVLIN :: DANCE TIL YOU CAN'T SAY YEAH! :: DANGER & PLASTIC :: DANGEROUS! :: DANIEL VARRICCHIO :: DANIELE VILELLA :: DANVERS :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DAPPLED CITIES :: THE DARDANELLES :: THE DARK LIGHTS :: DAS UBBERDUNG :: DAVE PHILLIPS :: DAY RAVIES :: DAYDREAM :: THE DAYLIGHT BRAVES :: DAYSWORTH FIGHTING :: THE DEAD BELLS :: DEAD END FRIENDS :: DEAD FRENCHMEN :: DEAD JOE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: DEADLY ARE THE NAKED :: DEAFAULT :: DEAR PLASTIC :: DEEP SEA ARCADE :: THE DEER JOHNS :: DEERHUNTER :: DEJA :: DEJA ENTENDU :: DELIA OBST :: THE DELTA RIGGS :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DESCRIBE ELIZA :: DESERT CROOKS :: A DEVIL AMONGST THE TAILORS :: DEVIL ELECTRIC :: THE DEVILROCK FOUR :: DEXTER JONES :: DIAMOND SINS :: DIANA SCALZI :: DICK DIVER :: DIE! DIE! DIE! :: DIESEL WITCH :: DIIV :: DIPLOMAT :: DIPSTONE :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: THE DIRTY MONKS :: DIRTY WOLVES :: THE DIVINE FLUXUS :: DIZZEE RASCAL :: DJ KELE OKEREKE :: DJ SHADOW :: DJ SPOZ :: DJANGO ROWE TRIO :: DMA'S :: DOE :: DOM TRIMBOLI & THE WIZARDS :: DON MORRISON :: DONNARUMMA :: DOUBLE DENIM :: DOUBLE DRAGON :: DOUBLE HANDED :: DOZERS :: DRAWN FROM BEES :: THE DREAMBOATS :: DRILLER JET ARMSTRONG :: THE DRONES :: DROPLET :: DRUID FLUIDS :: DRUNK MUMS :: DUD PILLS :: DUKES OF WINDSOR :: DUMB EARTH :: DUNE RATS :: THE DUNES :: DUNGEN :: DUSTY LEE :: DUSTY LEE & THE ANGELS OF GUNG HO :: DUSTY LEE'S WASTED WANDERERS :: DYSPORA :: DZ :: DZ DEATHRAYS :: EAST END VILLAINS :: ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN :: ECHO & THE EMPRESS :: EDDY CURRENT SUPPRESSION RING :: EGYPT :: THE EL CAMINOS :: ELECTRIC EXILES :: ELECTRIC FIELDS :: ELECTRIC WIDOWS ::ELEPHANT :: THE ELEVENTH HOUR :: THE E.L.F. :: ELLEN KIBBLE :: EL-P :: ELVIS :: EMDEE :: EMERGENCY RULE :: EMILY DAVIS :: EMILY WYATT :: EMPERORS :: EMMA HORWOOD :: EMPIRE VAGABOND :: ENCARTA :: ENDLESS NAMELESS :: ENEMY OF :: ENNIS TOLA :: ENVY STREET :: ES IST SUPER :: EVEN :: EXPATRIATE :: THE EXPLODERS :: EXPLODING PLASTIC INEVITABLE :: EZRA HOPE :: FACEMEAT :: FACEMEAT - A ROCK OPERA :: FAITH NO MORE :: FAIR MAIDEN :: THE FAK :: FAKE LAKE :: FAKE TAN :: FASCINATOR :: THE FAT SACK :: FAT TAILED ANTICHINUS :: FAVOUR THE BRAVE :: FEAR AND LOATHING :: THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS :: FEIST :: FEMME FATALES :: FERGUS O'REGAN :: FEZ FAANANA :: FIGHTERPILOT :: A FILM FOR THE FUTURE :: FILTHY LUCRE :: THE FINISHING SCHOOL :: FINNEN & DAVIDSON :: THE FINNS :: FIRS :: FISHING WITH HENRY :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA, FIRE! :: FIST PUMP, FIST BUMP :: FISTFUL OF TROJANS :: FKA TWIGS :: THE FLEEING MINDS :: FLEUR GREEN :: FLEUR GREEN & THE KEEPERS :: THE FLOORS :: FLORENCE & THE MACHINE :: FLUME :: THE FOLKO-OH-NOES :: FONT PLAYS FONT :: FORCES :: FOREIGN/NATIONAL :: FOREST OF GNOMES :: FORMER CHILD STARS :: FOX FAEHRMANN :: FOXX ON FIRE :: FRANZ FERDINAND :: FRAUD MILLIONAIRES :: FREESTATE :: FRESH KILLS :: FRIDAY'S FOX :: FRIENDS :: FROM THE DEAD SEA :: FULL CONTACT SAFARI :: THE FUMES :: FUNK LATIN UNION :: FUNKOARS :: FUTURE FARM :: FUTURE ISLANDS :: THE FYOOGS :: GALAPAGOOSE :: GALAXY CAT :: GALLEON :: GARDEN RUIN :: GAVIN DE ALMEIDA :: GAY PARIS :: THE GELS :: GEMINI DOWNS :: GENERATION SWINE :: GEORDIE LITTLE :: GERMEIN SISTERS :: GG ALAN BINDIG :: GHOST WALK :: GHOUL :: GHYTI :: GHYTI (DUO) :: GHYTI & THE PHILANTHROPIC ORCHESTRA :: GINDIANA BONES AND THE SEVERAL KIDNEYS OF THE UNDERGROUND TRAIN STATION :: GINFOX VS HELLO NEWMAN :: GIRL TALK :: THE GIVEAWAYS :: GLASS :: GLASS DUNES :: GLASS SKIES :: GLASS TOWERS :: GLISK :: GNARLS BARKLEY :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT (Lounge Set) :: GOLD BLOOM :: THE GOOD CHINA :: GOOD BOY :: GOONBOMB :: GOON WIZARRD :: GOTYE :: GRACE: THE SONGS OF JEFF BUCKLEY :: GRACE GOODFELLOW :: GRAFTON PRIMARY :: THE GRAND RAPIDS :: THE GRATES :: GRAVEYARD TRAIN :: GREAT GABLE :: THE GREETING METHOD :: GRENADIERS :: GREY DATURAS :: GRIMES :: GRIMEY :: GROOVE ARMADA :: GROUND COMPONENTS :: THE GROWL :: GUILLAUME SOLO ACOUSTIC :: GUINEAFOWL :: GUN IT :: GÜNTER & THE SAFEWORD :: GYRO :: HAIM :: HAL BIRD :: HALCYON DRIVE :: HALFWAY TO FORTH :: HANNAH FAIRLAMB :: THE HAPPY ENDINGS :: HAPPY SOMETIMES :: HAR MAR SUPERSTAR :: THE HARD ACHES :: HARMLESS HUNTER :: HARMONY :: HARRY FREEMAN :: HARTS :: HAWKS OF ALBA :: HAYSTACKS CALHOON :: HEAPS GOOD FRIENDS :: HEATH WEBER :: HEINOUS CRIMES :: HEKYL :: HELLO, LOVER :: HELLO NEWMAN :: HELMET :: HESTON DROP :: HEY FEVER :: HEY LADY! :: HI, I'M RECLUSIVE AUTHOR THOMAS PYNCHON :: HIGH STAKES :: HIGH TENSION :: HIGH VIOLET :: HIGHTIME :: HILLS & TRAINS :: HIT THE JACKPOT :: THE HOLD STEADY :: THE HOLIDAYS :: HOLOGRAPHIC CHARIZARD :: HOLOGRAPHIC COLTS :: HOLY FUCK :: HOLY HOLY :: THE HOLY SEA :: HOLY SERPENT :: HOME FOR THE DEF :: THE HONEY PIES :: HORROR MY FRIEND :: HOSPITAL THE MUSICAL :: HOT WINGS :: HOUSE OF JADE :: HOWL AT THE MOON :: HOWL 'N BONES :: HOWLING BELLS :: THE HOWLING FOG :: HUMBLE BEE :: HUMMINGBIRD :: HUNGRY KIDS OF HUNGARY :: THE HUNTED CROWS :: HURRICANE JANE :: HURRICANES :: THE HUSHES :: HUXLEY :: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT WEEZER :: I HEART HIROSHIMA :: I, A MAN :: ICE ON MERCURY :: ID :: IGGY POP & THE STOOGES :: IIAH :: ILLICIT EVE :: IMMIGRANT UNION :: IMOGEN BRAVE :: IMPARTIAL :: THE IMPOSSIBLE QUICHE :: THE INCHES :: INDIAGO :: INSTITUT POLAIRE :: INTERCOOLER :: INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF MOJO :: THE INTERNET :: INTERPOL :: INTERZONE EXPRESS :: INTROVERT :: INUETTE :: INWOODS :: IRAAN SANADZADEH :: IRIDIUM :: IRIE KNIGHTS :: THE IRRESPONSIBLES :: ISLE OF CAPRI :: ISLE OF VISION :: IT'S A HOAX :: IT'S A HOAX (INSTRUMENTAL) :: IT'S WARSAW :: IVORY :: J-LO BIAFRA :: J-WAH :: JACK LONDON :: JACKSON FIREBIRD :: JAMES PARRY :: JANE'S ADDICTION :: JAPAM :: JAPANDROIDS :: JAPANTHER :: JARVIS :: JARVIS COCKER :: JASON SIMON (DEAD MEADOW) :: JAY WALKER AND THE PEDESTRIANS :: JAYNE-ANNE POWER :: JEFF MARTIN & TEREPAI RICHMOND :: JESS KENT :: JESS PORTER :: JESSE DAVIDSON :: JESSE FRANCIS :: JESUS CHRIST POSSE :: THE JEZABELS :: JIKA :: JIMMY & THE MIRRORS :: JIMMY EAT WORLD :: JIMMY MARIN :: JIMMY MOUNTAIN :: JOE MCKEE :: JOEL STERN :: JOEL STERN, CURED PINK & TIMOTHY TATE :: THE JOHN STEEL SINGERS :: JOHNNY AMERICAN HORSE :: JON ADDAMS :: JON MARCO :: JON MORTIMER :: JONNY BLIZZARD :: JORDAN TITO :: JOSH CALLIGEROS :: JOURNEY WELL SPACE WIZARD :: JOY & SPARKS :: JP COE & THE DELEGATES :: JUDGE MENTAL :: JUMP! YOU REVOLUTIONARY :: JUNGLE CITY :: JUNGLEMIRE :: JUPITER :: JUPITER (DUO) :: JUPITER LEAD :: KAB SAVVY :: KAHL WALLIS :: KAMIKAZE :: KAMIKAZE TRIO :: KANGAROO SKULL :: KARL MELVIN :: KASABIAN :: KASAVETT :: KATE VIGO & THE UNDERGROUND ORCHESTRA :: KAURNA CRONIN :: KAZKARIV :: THE KEEPSAKES :: KELLIE LLOYD :: KELLY MENHENNETT :: KELSHY :: THE KEMP BROTHERS :: KHAN :: KID SAM :: KIDS IN CULTS :: KIDS WITH TEETH :: KIKUYU :: THE KILL DEVIL HILLS :: KILLER BIRDS :: THE KILLBOT FACTORY :: THE KILLGIRLS :: KING DADDY :: KING GIZZARD & THE LIZARD WIZARD :: KING KRILL :: KING KRULE :: KING OF THE NORTH :: KINGSTON DOWNES :: KINGSWOOD :: KINS :: KIRK SPECIAL :: KIRK WATT :: KITCHEN WITCH :: KITTEN KONG :: KITTYHAWK :: KOI CHILD :: KORAL :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: KRIS WANDERS :: KRISTINA MILTIADOU :: KURT VILE :: KYLIE BRICE TRIO :: KYRI :: KYTES OF OMAR :: LA FEMME LE FEVER :: LADY GUNG-HO & THE ANGELS OF STRANGELOVE :: LADY STRANGELOVE :: THE LADYBEATLES :: LADYHAWKE :: LAHARA :: LANCE LAZER & TALIBAND :: LARSEN :: LAST DAYS OF KALI :: LAST DINOSAURS :: THE LAST SUPPER :: LATE NIGHT MATINEE :: LATER THAT NIGHT :: LAURA HILL :: LAURA IMBRUGLIA :: LAW & DISORDER :: LAZARO'S DOG :: LC3'S :: LEAD WORM :: LEADER CHEETAH :: LEFT :: LEGENDS OF MOTORSPORT :: LEIGHSTARDUST :: THE LEITMOTIF :: LEITMOTIV LIMBO :: LE GATEAU CHOCOLAT :: LEMURIAN :: LENIN MCCARTHY :: LEO :: LEAPING FELIX :: LES SAVY FAV :: THE LEVITATORS :: LIFE IN LETTERS :: LIGHTS :: LIKE KITES :: LIKE LEAVES :: LIL VALENTINE :: LILY MOJITO :: LILLY SIM :: LILLYS RADIO :: LINE HONOURS :: LIPSMACK :: LITTLE BRIDGET :: LITTLE CAPTAIN :: LITTLE DRAGON :: LITTLE DUST :: LITTLE ICE AGE :: LITTLE PRINCE :: LITTLE TWO EYES :: THE LIZARDS :: LO! :: LOADED LEOPARD :: LOCAL REVOLUTION :: LOEMAX :: THE LONDON ROAD POETS :: THE LONELINESS OF A MIDDLE DISTANCE RUNNER :: LONELY FIRE :: LONG WALK HOME :: LONI RAE :: LOON LAKE :: LORDE :: LOST COSMONAUT :: THE LOST SHOW :: LOST VALENTINOS :: LOST WOODS :: LOUIS DONNARUMMA :: LOUISE ADAMS :: LOUISE & THE TORNADOS :: LOUISE ADAMS & THE FRINGE DWELLERS :: LOVE CREAM :: THE LOVE JUNKIES :: LOVE OF DIAGRAMS :: LOVE STEREO :: LOVE ZOMBIES :: THE LUCKSMITHS :: LUKE ASHBY BAND :: LUKE CARLINO :: LUKE DUX :: LUKE ESCOMBE :: LUKE EYGENRAAM :: LUKE GOLDING :: THE LUKE LOUIE TRIO :: LUMONICS :: LYLA :: MAC DEMARCO :: MACH PELICAN :: MACKENZIE :: MAD SHAPES :: MADCLASSIC :: MAGGIE & LOUIS :: MAGIC BONES :: THE MAGNETS :: MAKING :: MAMMAL :: MAMMOTH :: MAMMOTH LOGIC :: MANE :: MANI NEUMEIER & THE BITCHES OF ZEUS :: MANOR :: MARCUS COROWA :: MARK CURTIS & THE FLANNELETTES :: MARK CURTIS BAND :: MARCUS WARNECKE & SAM PORTER :: MARDEN :: MARGARET LLOYD & SEB TONKIN :: MARK CURTIS :: MARLA SINGER :: MARY TREMBLES :: MARY WEBB :: MASSIVE :: MASTER'S CURIOUS DELIRIUM :: THE MATEHS :: MATHEMATIC :: MATHIEU WERCHOWSKI :: MATT BANHAM :: MATTHEW BARLOW :: MATT HAYWARD :: MATTHEW MILES :: MAX SAVAGE :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS :: MAYDAY FAIR :: MAYFIELD :: MCKISKO :: MEAKE :: MEANWELL COLLEGE :: THE MEDICS :: MEGAFAUNA :: MENAGERIE :: MERCY ARMS :: MERE THEORY :: THE MESS HALL :: MESSRS :: METHYL ETHEL :: METZ :: MEZZANINE :: MICHAEL STOWERS :: MICK ARMSTRONG, ANDY ARMSTRONG & STAN BASTIRAS :: THE MIDDLE EAST :: MIDNIGHT JUGGERNAUTS :: THE MILTON EXPERIENCE :: MIKE MCKEON :: MIKE RADZEVICIUS :: MIKE TILBROOK :: MIKEY (EX ARTAX MISSION) :: MINDSHOWER :: MIO :: MIRRORLINE :: THE MISCHIEF :: MISCHIEF THE CAT :: MISS GOLLY GOSH :: MISS RENEE SIMONE :: THE MISSION IN MOTION :: MM9 :: MOGERLAINE :: THE MOLTING VULTURES :: MOMOKO SODA :: MONA LISA OVERDRIVE :: MONDO PHASE BAND :: MONEY FOR ROPE :: THE MONIKERS :: MONKEY PUZZLE TREE :: THE MONSTER SOCIETY OF EVIL :: MOODY BELLES :: MOONFAKER :: MOONHUNTER :: MORALS OF A MINOR :: THE MORNING AFTER GIRLS :: MOTHER'S CAKE :: THE MOTHERFUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS :: MOTHERSLUG :: THE MOTIVE :: MOTOWN CONNECTION :: MOUNTAIN STATIC :: MOUNTAIN STRANGER :: MOUNTAINS IN THE SKY :: MOUNTBATTEN :: MOURGOS GRUND :: THE MOURNING SONS :: MOVE TO STRIKE :: MOVIN' MELVIN BROWN :: MR ROSEWATER :: MR WEDNESDAY :: MUM'S TENNIS FRIENDS :: MUMFORD & SONS :: MUNCHKIN :: MUSCLE CAR VS HIGH STAKES :: MUSTERED COURAGE :: MUTEMATH :: MY DISCO :: MY SISTER THE COP :: MYLES MAYO :: N.A.S.A. :: NAKATOMI :: NAOMI KEYTE :: NAOMI KEYTE & TANNON KEW :: NATHAN KAYE :: NAZZ AND THE RED PONIES :: NEO FIX :: NEOHIP :: NEON BOGART :: NEON ELECTRIC :: NEREEDA :: NERVOUS GERBAL :: THE NEW CABAL :: NEW PANTS :: NEW POLLUTANTS :: NEW TRANSLATION :: NICK MURPHY :: THE NEW VAGUE :: NEW WHITE SNEAKERS :: NEW YORK DOLLS :: NEWTONHEATH :: NICHOLAS ALLBROOK :: NICK OLIVERI :: NICK OLIVERI & FILTHY LUCRE :: NICKER TEENS :: NIGEL KOOP & STEVIE BEE :: NIKAI :: NIKKO :: NIKKO & SNOOKS :: NITIDUS :: NO BIRDS :: NO THROUGH ROAD :: NO ZU :: NOBODY KNEW THEY WERE ROBOTS :: THE NOVOCAINES :: NUVO :: THE NYMPHS :: O' LITTLE SISTER :: THE OCEAN PARTY :: OCEANICS :: ODYSSEY :: THE OFFCUTS :: OH MERCY :: OH MINOR :: OH MY GUARD! :: OISIMA :: OKKERVIL RIVER :: OLD MATE :: OLIVERS ARMY :: OLLIE ENGLISH :: OLLY HOLMES :: ONE THOUSAND COUPLES :: ONION :: ONLY OBJECTS :: ONNIE ART :: THE ORBWEAVERS :: ORELIA :: THE OSCILLATORS :: OSH10 :: OVERVIEW EFFECT :: OWLS OF THE SWAMP :: PABLO LIBIDO & THE WHITE ROBOTS :: PAIGE RENEE COURT :: PALACE OF THE KING :: PALEFACE :: THE PANDA BAND :: PANACEA :: PANOPTIQUE ELECTRICAL :: PAPA VS PRETTY :: PAPER ARMS :: THE PAPER SCISSORS :: PARADES :: PARTY :: PARTY DOZEN :: PATRIARCHAL DEATH MACHINE :: PATRICK SARACINO :: PEACHES & HERM :: PEABODY :: PENELOPE SUICIDE :: PENNY IKINGER :: PERFECT PUSSY :: PERSIA & THE GEORGE GRIFSAS QUARTET :: THE PET SHOP BOYS :: PETER COMBE :: THE PHARAOHS :: PHILADELPHIA GRAND JURY :: THE PHOBIAS :: PHOENIX :: PIMPIN' HORUS :: PINK NOISE GENERATOR :: PINKY BEECROFT & THE WHITE RUSSIANS :: PISTOL SHRIMP :: THE PITS :: PIVOT :: THE PIXIES :: PLACEBO :: THE PLEASURE OF BOOKS :: PLUG IN CITY :: PNAU :: POCKET ACE :: POETIKOOL JUSTICE :: POLY & THE STATICS :: POND :: PONY DANCE :: PONYTAIL KINK :: THE POP-UPS :: POPY JANE :: POPEYE & OLIVE OYL :: PORCHLIGHT PARADE :: POST DEATH POST :: THE PRESETS :: PRESTON'S HISTORIC PUNCH & JUDY SHOW :: PRINCE RAMA :: PRINCESS ONE POINT FIVE :: PROBLEMS :: THE PRODIGY :: THE PRO-TOOLS :: THE PROPHETS OF IMPENDING DOOM :: PSYCHEDELIC P*RN CRUMPETS :: PSYCHIC 5 :: THE PSYCHONAUTS :: PUNK JAZZ MONORAIL :: PURITY RING :: PUT DOWNS :: QUA :: QUANTUM CHAOS :: QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE :: QUEST :: QUESTION QUESTION :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: RACHEL CEARNS :: RACHEL CEARNS & THE VALKYRIES :: RADIANT CITY :: RADIO SPECTACULAR!!! :: RADIO STAR :: RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE :: THE RAGING POPULATION :: RAINDROP :: RAPID TRANSPORT :: THE RAPTURE :: RAT TA'MANGO :: RAUCOUSTRA :: RAURY :: THE RAVEONETTES :: THE READYMADES :: REALIST FEW :: REALM :: RED APPARITION :: RED COATS :: RED DESERT OCEAN :: THE RED EARTH BLUES BAND :: RED INK :: THE RED PAINTINGS :: RED SEA :: THE RED SUN BAND :: REGULAR JOHN :: REGURGITATOR :: RELYING ON LUCK :: REJUSA :: THE REMEMBERZ :: RENDEZVOUS WITH RAMA :: THE REPROBETTES :: REPTILES :: RICH DAVIES & AYLEEN O'HANLON :: RICH DAVIES & THE LOW ROAD :: RICHARD IN YOUR MIND :: RICOCHET PETE :: RIDE INTO THE SUN :: RIN MCARDLE :: RIN & THE RECKLESS :: RINCON :: RINGO STALIN :: RIOT RUNNERS :: RISEMANN :: RITES WILD :: RIVER OF SNAKES :: ROBOTOSAURUS :: ROCKET SCIENCE :: THE ROCKETEERS :: ROGER THAT :: ROGUE ROMANTIC :: THE ROLLERCANES :: RON THE OX :: THE ROOFTOPS :: ROOK :: RORY O'CONNOR :: ROSS DE CHENE HURRICANES :: ROTE MARE :: ROYAL BLOOD :: THE ROYAL GALA :: ROYAL HEADACHE :: THE RUBENS :: RULE OF THIRDS :: THE RULES :: RUN THE JEWELS :: RUNNING WITH HORSES :: RUNZELSTIRM & GURGLESTOCK :: RUSSIA :: RUSSIAN TEAMMATE :: RYAN MARTIN JOHN :: RYAN MEEKING & THE FEW :: RYAN OLIVER :: SACRED SHRINES :: SAILMAKER :: SAILORS AND SWINE :: SAINT HUCK :: THE SALVADORS :: SAM WOOLFORD :: SAMPA THE GREAT :: SAN CISCO :: SARAH BLASKO :: SARAH CHADWICK :: SASHA MARCH :: SASHA MARSH & THE DAWNHORSE :: SATAN'S CHEERLEADERS :: SATIN HAREM :: SAUL WILLIAMS :: SAVAGES :: SAVING SAVANAH :: THE SCARE :: THE SCARLET IVES :: SCHOOL OF RADIANT LIVING :: SCREAMFEEDER :: SCREAMING GIBBON :: THE SEA THIEVES :: SEA URCHIN & ALLIES :: SEABELLIES :: SEAMUS ANTHONY :: SEAN DESMOND :: SEAN KEMP :: SECRETS IN SCALE :: SEEKAE :: SERENDIPITY :: THE SERRA :: SEVENTEEN FIFTY SEVEN :: SEX ON TOAST :: SEX WIZARD :: SEX UNCLE :: SEXUAL DAD :: THE SHADOW LEAGUE :: SHADOWQUEEN :: THE SHAKE UP :: SHAMAN SON :: SHAME SPIRAL :: THE SHAOLIN AFRONAUTS :: SHAPES DIVIDE :: SHARK IN THE DARK :: SHE SAID YOU :: SHE'S THE BAND :: SHILOH :: THE SHINE :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS :: SHIVERS :: SHOJI HANO :: SIAMESE :: SIANNA LEE :: SIDEWALKS :: S.I.G.I.T. :: SILENT DUCK :: THE SILENTS :: SIMON & JENNY :: SIMON ABERLE :: SIN CITY :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY :: SIR GERBIL :: SISTER ROSE :: SITARA :: SKELETONS :: SKIES :: SKIPPING GIRL VINEGAR :: SKYBOMBERS :: SKYTHIEF :: SKYE HARBOUR :: SLAMAGOTCHI :: SLAVE GIRLS FROM BEYOND INFINITY :: SLEEP PARADE :: SLEEPTALKER :: THE SLEEPY JACKSON :: SLICK ARNOLD :: SLINGSHOT DRAGSTER :: THE SLOE RUIN :: SLOWLY SLOWLY :: SLY HATS :: SMALL AFFAIRS :: SMASHING PUMPKINS :: SMILE :: THE SMITH STREET BAND :: SNAKADAKTAL :: SNAP TO ZERO :: THE SNOWDROPPERS :: SNOWMAN :: ...SO YEAH :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE :: SOJOURN :: SOMNIUM :: SOMMNIUM :: SONATINE :: SONIC DEATH MONKEY :: SONS OF ZOKU :: SOURSOP :: SOUTH FROM SOMEWHERE :: SOUTHPOOR :: SPANK ROCK :: SPARKSPITTER :: SPARTAK :: SPECIAL PATROL :: SPEED MACHINE :: SPIKE THE RIVER :: SPILT CITIES :: SPINDICKLE :: SPINE :: THE SPIRES :: SQUEAKER :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: ST. VINCENT :: STABBITHA & THE KNIFEY WIFEYS :: STANDARD UNION :: STARS :: STARS YOUNG :: THE STEADY ONS :: STEEL TIGER :: STEERING BY STARS :: STEREOLAB :: STEVE SMYTH :: THE STIFFYS :: THE STILL MOVEMENT :: STONEFIELD :: STOP SAYING HELICOPTER :: THE STORM WILL COVER OUR TRACKS :: STRAIGHT TO VIDEO :: THE STRAIGHT-JACKET TAILORS :: STREETLIGHT :: STREGA :: SUBAUDIBLE HUMM :: SUBMERGE :: SUBTRACT S :: SUBURBAN STANDOFF :: SUGAR ARMY :: SUMI :: SUMMER BLOOD :: SUMMER FLAKE :: THE SUN AND THE SKY :: THE SUNBIRDS :: THE SUNDANCE KIDS :: THE SUNDAY REEDS :: SUNK LOTO :: SUNSETTLER :: SUPER XX MAN :: SUPERBEE :: SUPERCAINE :: SUPERCAINE DUO :: SUPERCAINE DUO (with DUSTY LEE STEPHENSEN) :: THE SUPERGROUPATOOS :: SUPERPHATASS :: SURES :: SURFER ROSA :: SURVIVING SHARKS :: SUZI STAPLETON :: SWAYBACK :: SWEEPER :: THE SWEET DECLINE :: SWEET GOLD :: SWIMMING :: SWIMSUIT :: THE SWISS :: SWORDS :: SXWZD :: SYDONIA :: THE SYSTEMADDICTS :: SYSTEM OF A DOWN :: TABULA RASA :: TALL TALL TREES :: TALVIN SINGH :: TAME IMPALA :: TANTALUM :: THE TANUKI SUIT :: TASH SULTANA :: TAUGHT BY ANIMALS :: TEA :: THE TEDDY ROYALS :: TEENAGE CRIME :: TEENAGERSINTOKYO :: TELEPROMPTER :: TEMPER TRAP :: TEMPORAL LOBE :: THE TEMPS :: TERRA FIRMA :: THANES :: THELMA PLUM :: THEM PLASMS :: THEM SWOOPS :: THESE WILD ANIMALS :: THE THIEVES :: THIS CITY SUNRISE :: THOSE MAGNIFICENT SCREAMING BASTARDS :: TIERSMAN :: THE TIM MCMILLAN BAND :: TIM MOORE :: THE TIMBERS :: THE TIMBERS TRIO :: TIMBERWOLF :: TINY CONSPIRACY :: TINY SPIDERS :: THEE OH SEES :: THOM LION & THE TAMERS :: THOMAS CAPOGRECO :: THRASHBOARD :: THUNDERCLAW :: TIGER CHOIR :: TIGER ET GHOST :: THE TITS :: TKAY & BADCOP :: TKAY MAIDZA :: TODD SIBBIN :: TODD SIBBIN & THE ACADIAN DRIFTWOOD :: TODD SIBBINS & THE OPPOSITE ENDS :: TOKYO CITY SEX SHOOTERS :: DJ TOM LOUD :: TOM CAPOGRECO & DUNCAN CAMPBELL :: TOM SMITH :: TOM WEST :: TOM WEST & TODD SIBBIN :: TOM THUM :: TOM UGLY :: TOMORROW IS :: TONY FONT SHOW :: TOOL :: TORK :: THE TORRENS :: TORTE E MORT :: THE TOSS :: TOTALLY UNICORN :: THE TOUCH :: TOUGH BOYS :: TOXIC SHOCK :: TRACER :: THE TRAFALGARS :: THE TRANSATLANTICS :: TRANSPORT :: TRASH CITY :: TRAVELLER & FORTUNE :: TREETOPS :: TRENT WORLEY :: TRICIA CATFORD :: THE TRIPPING LILIES :: TRIXIE PLAIN :: TRUCE :: TRUCE & THE COLONEL :: TRUCKFIGHTERS :: TRUTH CORRODED :: TTTDC :: TULSA :: TUMBLEWEED :: TUSCADERO :: THE TWOKS :: TWO SUNS :: TWO WAY RADIO :: TYCHO :: TYGER TYGER :: TYMPANO :: TYRESWANS :: TZU :: UK SPECIAL :: UNCLE CHUNK :: UNCUT WHITE NOISE :: UNKLE :: UNKNOWN MORTAL ORCHESTRA :: UNPAID DEPT :: THE UNSET :: UNSPOKEN THINGS :: URTEKK :: VALENTIINE :: VALIANT JONES :: VALKYRIES :: THE VAMPIRE PROJECT :: VAN CLEEF :: VAN SHE :: VANE OF BARBS :: VANILLA ICE :: THE VANITY CURE :: VANITY ERA :: VARLIIBA :: THE VASCO ERA :: THE VENICE WHALERS :: VENTOLIN :: VERONA LIGHTS :: THE VILLENETTES :: THE VILLENETTES (DUO) :: THE VINES :: THE VIOLET CRAMS :: VIOLENT SOHO :: VIRTUE :: VNB :: THE VOLUME :: VOLUME = COLOUR :: VOWEL MOVEMENT :: VOXANGELICA :: WALTER MARSH :: WARPAINT :: THE WARRING SIGHS :: THE WARSAW FLOWERS :: THE WARSAW PACT :: WASHINGTON :: WASTED WANDERERS :: THE WATERSLIDES :: WE ALL WANT TO :: WE AS ART, WE AS ARTISTS :: WE GROW UP :: WEED CAPITAL :: THE WEEVILS :: WEST THEBARTON :: WHERE WERE YOU AT LUNCH :: THE WHISKEY GO GO'S :: THE WHISPERERS :: WHITE LUNG :: WHITE RHINO :: THE WHITE STRIPES :: WHITE SUMMER :: WILD OATS :: WILD ROCKET :: THE WILD THINGS :: WILEY RED FOX :: THE WILLIAM STREET STRIKERS :: WILLIE MCRAE BAND :: THE WINTER GYPSY :: WINTER'S LAMENT :: WINTERCOATS :: WINTERMILD :: WIREHEADS :: THE WITCH :: WITCH HATS :: WOE :: WOLF & CUB :: WOLFMOTHER :: WOMEN MOVING FURNITURE :: THE WOOHOO REVUE :: THE WOOLCOCKS :: WORLD WILD :: WYLDE THROE :: THE X O EXES :: XANGO :: XL VISION :: THE XX :: YANKEE MACHINE :: YEASAYER :: YOSSARIAN :: YOUNG AND RESTLESS :: YOUNG HEARTS FAIL :: YOUNG OFFENDERS :: YOUNG RIVER & THE VULTURES OF VIRTUE :: YOUR LOYAL HEARTLESS :: YOUR MOTIVE FOR :: YOUTH & WONDER :: YUSUKE AKAI :: YVES KLEIN BLUE :: ZEAL :: ZEEQUIL :: ZETA :: ZOE BEHAN ::

:: Friday, April 01, 2011

LIVE REVIEW / THE HONEY PIES (*****)
LIVE @ THE GRACE EMILY / Saturday March 26th 2011

Now if this blog has proved nothing ELSE over the years (short of the fact you can actually make a "living" out of being a drunk) it's that there are a great many ways to "succeed" in the art of live performance; and that very few of them actually require talent. I mean sure you could possess, or be willing to learn, a bona-fide "musical talent", ie: the damn near supernatural ability to actually hold a "tune" (or maybe even write one!). But yeaaah that's not for everyone as it does require a considerable amount of "time and patience": what with all the years studying, practicing, dealing with your increasingly impatient girlfriend/boyfriend/centrelink staff who don't quite "share" in your lifelong dreams (or in your increasingly expensive obsession in buying up everything stupid and/or insane you see listed on eBay just because you saw Jonny Greenwood use it that one time). Or you could simply "bullshit" your way out, ie: be so damn esoteric and artistic in everything you do that no matter how crap you are at actually playing an instrument, people will still think you're a genius. Or failing that you could move to Brooklyn, live like a bum on the street (or simply dress like one) and before you know it hipster tragics everywhere will be blogging sanctimonious garbage on you. Or you could try the "punk rock" method: have no musical talent? creativity? even the base ability to form complete sentences!? simply be the loudest, lewdest mad c*nt ever to urinate into a crowd or defecate on top of a cop car... popularity guaranteed! Or just try the disposable "pop" method: be really really ridiculously "good looking" and let autotune take care of all the rest. Or failing that post it onto youtube and wait for it to go "viral". Or failing THAT just smear yourself head to toe in poo, piss, peanut butter and glitter and be willing to fuck everything that moves (with an option on everything that doesn't). Or your name is "Matt Banham"... as much as we still can't figure out how THAT works. And as for what any of this has to do with The Honey Pies and their show at The Grace Emily tonight? WHO THE FUCK KNOWS!? but trust me... you'll still wanna take notes regardless!



Yup when it comes to bona-fide "musical talent" The Honey Pies clearly need no introduction: not just because they've been featured in Spoz's Rant countless times before in the past few years and written up in glowing terms of praise at least five kinds of obnoxious (pretty much ever since forming in late 2007) but also because in releasing their debut album "Think Of England" earlier this year (launched late last year at Jive and yes you SO totally should've been there too!) they've thankfully all but proven I wasn't just talking out of my arse when I wrote all that obnoxious praise to begin with; because yes it IS nothing but brilliant and yes I highly recommend you dig it up too! (you can even stream it in its entirety HERE for free if you're a total cheapskate). Just as they've also demonstrated a devilish aptitude for artistry and ingenuity in promoting it, especially of the piss-takingly mischevious kind, just this week in fact, when they released their first music video for the album "Don't Mention The War": which is well worth seeing if ever you wanted to know what the music video to City Riots' "She Wants To Dance" would look like as a Frankenstein mashup with Gary Busey's face plastered all over the top of it (only a LOT MORE disturbingly hilarious than that description might make it sound). I mean no shit they're nothing but genius, GENIUS!! They have this uncanny knack for channelling all the infectious songwriting charm of The Beatles and lacing it with all the anarchic "shitstorm" hysteria of The Libertines. They're easily one of the better bands happening in the Adelaide scene right now (I mean seriously? can I shut up about this already? because this is all just assumed knowledge riiight!?). But as much as they ARE the closest thing to a "sure bet" this scene has to the point it's getting ridiculous that they haven't been signed to a label yet? what may need elaborating upon is just how much (especially in the past year) they love to make an absolute mockery of it live. I mean sure they may still wield all the musical talent, the creativity and the charm to nail the shit out of a live performance (and believe me they've proven as such countless times in the past) but increasingly it's become a bit of a "game" to see just how much they can totally fuck it up and STILL get away with it; or more specifically it has for their lead singer Jon Marco. Yup you may come for the music, but now you stay for the slapstick comedy that is watching Jon toy with every other member of the band (short of perhaps Tom McCarthy-Jones on bass who seems more than happy to space out in his own little world in the corner) but most of all in how much he messes with Tony Marshall on guitar. Seriously the more Jon shreds a song too fast, throws in a random segue like a spanner, rearranges their already randomly generated setlist on a whim, or all-too-frequently breaks a string? which he NEVER brings a spare for (and tonight after fucking it up in only the first song? yup he had to borrow Dave Williams' guitar from Danvers & Ghost Knife to continue... classic!) the funnier it is to watch Tony look increasingly bewildered and bug-eyed exasperated to a fullblown nervous breakdown in trying to hold it all together (like that one time back in June 2010 when he had to swap guitar parts with Jon on "Fool In Love" after the latter broke all but two strings oh HIS guitar? HA HA HA DUUUDE!!). Yup it's just like watching the increasingly dysfunctional relationship between Pete Doherty and Carl Barât of The Libertines being played out in front of you (or better yet a Tom and Jerry cartoon with the volume cranked) it very much defines their riotous stage presence like a ticking time bomb; underpins just how good, bad or unintentionally hilarious any of their live shows will be in keeping that precarious balance in check... and tonight in pushing it right to the very screaming extreme of catastrophe only to stop a few shades short of actually losing it!? duuude it's truly jaw dropping shit! I've never seen a band skate THIS dangerously close to the razor's edge and still get away with it. It gives me grey hairs just thinking about it (in fact I'm half surprised Tony hasn't gone completely albino from it). No shit, if you missed out on THIS show tonight? you missed out on one FUCK of a rollercoaster ride! The Honey Pies. I may need to pop a panadol or two to stop my head from exploding just making sense of HOW exactly they got away with murder tonight...? but FUCK DUUUDE, WHAT A SHOW!!





















But of course that wasn't the ONLY reason why this show was worth a "five star rating": as much as watching them perform the musical equivalent of juggling knives, chainsaws and hand grenades in the air just short of bringing the whole roof down around our ears, was worth "price of admission" alone (as much it was The Grace Emily, so there WAS no "price of admission", so your excuse for not being here was...?) as much as it didn't hurt either that they had ridiculously "shit-hot" stage lighting to shoot under (not that I got totally carried away with THAT or anything!) nope it was also for the a-grade calibre of the songs themselves. And if you're at all familiar with their album you would've recognised most of them: "Sex Wax", "Hair Of The Dog", "Get Right", "Don't Mention The War", "Fool In Love" and "Bossanova" (to name but a few). But they also threw in a few new songs (potentially planned for a second album release later this year?) namely: "Rubix Cube", "I Heart New York" and possibly a few others too (as obviously I didn't recognise them all). Just as anyone at all familiar with their live shows would also know that what you're seeing below ISN'T a setlist providing the order they played them in, but merely a loose "serving suggestion" (or possibly just Jon Marco's shopping list and they're all code for chemical ingredients used to make domestic explosives) but... yeaaah let's just say there was hardly a dud among them and leave it at that.



Because I know what some of you are thinking. I'm simply lumping loads of sycophantic praise on some dodgyarse band I get drunk with, that you've probably never heard of before, and will likely never hear about, or even give half a shit about until Triple J high rotates them to a mental illness every hour of every day, at which point you'll likely KEEP giving me crap for it regardless: "pfft it's Adelaide maaan! move to Melbourne! stop gigging! break up already! NOBODY CARES YA FUCKING ARSECLOWNS!!". Ooooh I bet you think these reviews are nothing more than a massive circle jerk don't ya? DON'T YOU!? (and to be honest a lot of it IS, it's utterly unavoidable, as I do know and get drunk with, well... pretty much everyone in the Adelaide scene!). But before you DO discount my "five star rating" here as little more than me just blowing smoke up their arse? I give you this: this is the "wildy enthusiastic" crowd that The Honey Pies had at the start of their show tonight...



And THIS is that same crowd totally losing their minds at the end of their show? Yup for pulling one tiny broken guitar string short of a flawless execution and making it look like a happy accident (teetering on a fullblown catastrophe), for getting a crowd to dance to it in mad hysterics like it's the maddest party in town (and with the songs they write, how could you blame them!?) THAT was The Honey Pies showing us just how it's done... HA HA HA duuude they made this shit look easy!



LENIN MCCARTHY (***1/2) - But of course they weren't the ONLY band worth mentioning tonight; as much as you may've noticed I'm being all "lazy" in only mentioning the ONE at length now, anytime I DO do a writeup (ie: when I'm not posting photo blogs instead, why? IT'S MY BLOG YA FUCKWITS, I CAN DO WHAT I WANT!!) nope there was also our opening act Lenin McCarthy. Who the fuck are they? HA HA HA WHO THE FUCK KNOWS!? as to be honest this is the first time I've even heard of them; but at the very least I DO gotta give them some due "credit"... and not just because they're being all "clever" with their band name; but hey how hilariously witty are they with the whole Bolsheviks meets The Beatles thing? FUCK! WHY DIDN'T WE THINK OF IT SOONER!? (ooooh but wait The Beatles already DID back in 1968, nevermind!) but more because they were anything BUT clever in making total dicks of themselves on a live stage; but in such a way you can't help but think they'll be five kinds of stupidly awesome six months to a year down the track when they get REALLY good at it. But still from what little I saw here tonight? they made for quite the "memorable" first impression. In short think equal parts Pavement, The Libertines, Black Lips and the shittiest high school "garage band" you've ever heard, barely playing their instruments properly to the retarded adolescent screams of their singer
Kristian Ramsden. But in such a mad frenetic, enthusiastic way you can help but ping-pong off all four walls and a ceiling in celebration. Apparently all four members wear silly "novelty hats" as part of their ongoing "thing"; as much as most of those had long since disappeared into the crowd when I arrived tonight. The same scruffy rag-tag bunch of delinquents I vaguely recognise as the sort you'd find at alleyway shows (as much as I've only been to ones that got cancelled... damnit!) or crowding around front of stage forming moshpits for The Aves... at The Exeter. The same who are dancing so hard to this shit now they're making the floorboards bounce and wobble under the carpet, which is now threatening to topple the foldback speakers, and I can't blame them really because it's JUST that kinda mad jam that very much warrants it (as in the crappier they play the more awesome they seem to sound? with an infantile sense of humour that only makes it more infectious!?). Yup that's Lenin McCarthy. They're precocious little shits the lot of them, ankle biting crap weasels and crater-faced skeezoids if ever I saw them... but if they keep being this loud, goofy and obnoxious? I reckon they'll go reaaal far!















DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE (****1/2) - And then there was our second act. And no I won't go into detail with their set tonight, what they played, how it sounded, blah-di-blah whoop-whoop whatever-the-fuck... as it was pretty much near identical to a set they played a month ago when they supported Mountbatten's EP launch at The Jade Monkey. And no that's not a bad thing, in fact quite the contrary: they're one of the maddest bands I've discovered so far this year (no surprises really: considering they're two members of Fire! Santa Rosa, Fire! and on
e member of Steering By Stars joining forces to jam out a bastard fusion of freak folk and the blues... SHIT YEAAAH BABY!!). Duuude they'll blow your pinks bits inside out oscillating like a loud speaker till it burns to pee and you'll have to "crabwalk" sideways through archways and doorways... NO SERIOUSLY, DON'T JUST STAND THERE GAWKING LIKE AN IMBECILE, GO SEE THIS BAND ALREADY!! (oh and read my previous "live review" on them as it'll likely make a lot more sense than what I just wrote here... pheeeuw!). But still what I WILL mention is a funny little incident I had while waiting at the bar. Soon after The Honey Pies finished, lead singer Dave Williams passed on by, and he goes: "soooo Spoz, totally 5 out of 5 right?". To which I promptly blurted out "HA HA HA totally, that shit was fucking nuts... oh no wait, you mean YOUR BAND!?". At which point we both laughed. Then I made some lamearse comment about me judging every band in a night on a "sliding scale" anyways, only to add "but seriously, who gives a FUCK what I think!?". At which point we both laughed even louder and then promptly forgot we even had this conversation (as much as I've forgetten what the whole point of this anecdote was in the first place). Either way, Danvers & Ghost Knife? totally look their shit up!














12:30AM - And speaking of nonsensical segues that relate to absolutely nothing I've mentioned above: this is me wandering into the beergarden after the show, beer in hand... for what purpose? well as much as I'd like to think it was simply me "celebrating" one head explodingly awesome live set from The Honey Pies tonight (and HOW!!) by drinking myself so blissfully anaesthetised in following I wouldn't even be conscious of the fact that a good portion of "higher brain function" had long since been "aerosol sprayed" over all four walls and the ceiling of the band room moments earlier? (it's an occupational health hazard lemme tell you!) there actually WAS no clear purpose to it at all, in fact I wouldn't normally think it worth documenting now; except that almost everytime I do this shit and I think I might just get away it... I'm then assaulted with an A-Z of hilarious social dysfunction that I would be utterly remiss in NOT presenting to you now for public ridicule (also an occupational health hazard, but not necessarily for me). Like Dan Gaskin for instance: what with the ridiculous banana sticker on his forehead (as much as I may've put it there myself) crazy huh? HA HA HA totally! As much as he wasn't the maddest cat I uncovered at The Grace Emily tonight...



Nope that prize easily goes to Choaty here... why exactly is he called "Choaty"? I don't think I've ever asked (or even dared to) as much as it ACTUALLY relates to his last name; as much as I've always lazily assumed (in absence of any evidence to the contrary) that if ever you got his throat in a choke hold... you know for "laughs", and gave it a good squeeze: his head would blow up like a balloon and he'd giggle like a school girl, or his eyes would pop out, or he'd glow a radiant shade of green like a fairy night light, or maybe a technician from Jim Henson's Creature Shop would leap angrily out from some invisible vantage point, waving a remote control and loudly chatise you for damaging the "merchandise" because they need his animatronics intact for a "sequel to E.T." or something. HA HA HA "Choaty" a gift that keeps on giving! And as for that cake he's got there? yeaaah your guess is as good as mine; maybe one of his sex dungeon employees "baked" it!?



1:05AM - And just to get your mind off all that horrifying mental imagery (so I can proceed to fill it up again with yet more fucked up shit further down the track) here's Jon Marco from The Honey Pies wearing my hat. As much as it's not my hat at all... but a hat stolen off of Anthony Candlish from Ride Into The Sun on New Years Eve and despite repeated (halfarse) attempts in the past few months I've never been able to return it. So obviously in revenge (as much as this was all my fault to begin with) I've decided that I'm gonna get as many photos of this hat on as many different people as possible by the end of the year, and then I'm gonna do a blog on it and show it to him. AND I SWEAR IT'LL BE THE CRAZIEST FUCKED UP SHIT EVER!! WOOOO!! or yeaaah *cough* maybe not. Either way, how awesome is that hat!? and would you believe I peed in it once...? true story!



2:46AM - Actually no wait, that's a horrible lie and I wholeheartedly apologise for it! seriously, I would never even think to do that!? (yeah ok... that's a lie too!). In fact this isn't even Anthony hat to begin with! NOOOO!! the real one's totally kept in "pristine condition", hermetically sealed in a perspex bubble in my living room under lights and soft mood music (aaaah 'tis a thing of beauty to behold too!) and I've merely been buying up "stunt doubles" from the BP down the road and disposing of them every night just to fuck with him! Isn't that right Shari? here in The Ed Castle beergardens: modelling said "stunt double" with such poise, grace, elegance and sophistication (gosh darn she's pretty!) you'd almost be blissfully distracted from the fact I've been giddily binge drinking myself retarded for the past hour and a half here since leaving The Grace Emily and I'm seriously not fooling anyone!? YOU BETCHA!! her and that hat is all you need worry about here...



And here she is acting out what I just said in "pantomime" form. Awesome...



3:41AM - Yup to be honest
I've been debating (for the longest time) whether any of the above insanity is still "relevant" to a blog documenting the "Adelaide scene" (short of Shari's exceptional performance there of course; that shit be nothing but gold!) or even if it's downright damaging to everyone involved. I mean reviewing live bands is one thing: bands need exposure, bands need to be heard, seen and written about (even when done by clueless fuckwits like me!) it all helps the industry, the artists, the venues and the economy surrounding it, and believe me we need ALL THE HELP WE CAN GET!! But do we really need to see me and my fuckup friends laughing it up drink into the wee hours celebrating it in a "live review" on The Honey Pies!? pfft... OF COURSE NOT!!



But try telling THAT to all the people seated around me: late on a Saturday night in The Ed Castle beergarden when I pull my camera out "absent mindedly" to shoot some jugs and pint glasses in front of me (for reasons I can't quite recall but I bet they were totally justified!), only to wave their hands in my face and go "nah... nah... Spoz, get a photo of us ya baaastard! G'AAAWN!!" and it's coming from someone like Matt Hayward who clearly knows better NEVER to ask me that, only for him to rope in Alister and Larissa from 20th Century Graduates too, and aaaah fuck it... who are we kidding? I'M WAY TOO DRUNK TO SAY NO TO THIS!! and it's waaay too hilarious for me not to publish it. Yup relevant or not, you just can't write about one WITHOUT acknowledging the other.



Which is obviously all the half-baked justification I'd ever need for including THIS goofyarse shot of Larissa and errr... "poodle perm" here? (and yet he looks weirdly familiar like I've reviewed his band before or something, hmmm?) because hell, why the fuck not duuude? MORE THE MERRIER!!



3:53AM - Or for THIS shot we got moments later... "WHOAAA FUCK!?". Yes I know! as much as I don't know HOW? only that sometimes, just sometimes, copious amounts of alcohol, Larissa leaping into the bushes and a camera lens combine at just the RIGHT moment to provide you with such radiant splendour (and bonus points too for just how well she colour coordinated her retinas!).



3:56AM - And then just after THIS shot was taken? we suddenly realised just how badly shit had "spiralled out of control" here... and the sooner we left The Ed Castle? the better it'd be for us all (b
ut no really, who knew they had a toilet behind all those posters!? FUCK DAMN THAT'S INSANE!!).



4:08AM - And then when I got to Supermild shit just got a whole lot weirder. And by a "whole lot weirder" I obviously mean a whole lot DRUNKER (ie: look no further than Rodney from Fasterlouder there on the left... yeeeouch!) but also a whole lot weirder in what random stripey girl (possibly with a Swedish accent?) had on the right. Yup that's an "Adelaide Convenience" four bean salad, and I shit you not duuudes it SO totally blew our minds sideways just now I don't even have the words!



So instead here's a photo of me "munging" into it like a mental patient. Which I did repeatedly, I mean nonstop, I mean I just went fucking beserk on it. "SERIOUSLY, THERE'S LIKE FOUR KINDS OF BEANS IN THIS THING!? NO WAAAY!!". And yes I apologise if anyone's eating right now, because I admit it does look kinda bent, but believe me it was the best shit EVER past 4AM on a Saturday...



Or even better with whatever the hell it is Rodney shouted me at the bar just now: which from what little he told me apparently contains vodka. Hmmm. Which is funny because "vodka" is usually my "kryptonite": I mean it completely fucks me over (and NOT in a good way!). But with these beans? it was like a marriage made in Vegas heaven and my entire lower intestinal tract is performing a symphony! Or on seconds thoughts... maybe that's not a good thing? but maaan I so didn't care!



Which is just the kind of cheerfully "ambivalent" state you'd wanna be in when Rodney's flapping his arms about like a demented albatross in front of you; as much as he looks like a mad pimping "albatross" with that hat, the same hat (or stunt double) that I stole off Anthony Candlish back on New Years Eve and have been parading about ever since... and yeaaah I know, I know! it may seem "lame" now but once you've seen six months to a year of this shit? it's gonna be hiiilarious!



As much as Rodney pulling the exact same batshit "facial expression" in almost every single one of my photos tonight will clearly have the same comedic effect on ME, it just hasn't kicked in yet...



*cough* yup, aaany minute now...



4:19AM - Or at least it would have, I mean it SO would have! if I didn't just throw that four bean salad in Kane Banner's direction here, then run like hell for the exit (exit? EXIT!? pfft... what exit!? OF COURSE I WENT BACK TO THE BAR!!). Yup the look on his face truly says it all doesn't it? Kane I'm so sorry I had to put you through all that... but no seriously, how GOOD were those beans!?



And there we have it: it's an exceptionally weird way to end an episode and I'm aware of it, but if it's any consolation? in the same way a butterfly flapping its wings in Tokyo causes a thunderstorm in New York!? I'm totally blaming all this shit on The Honey Pies... that gig tonight was fucked up!



Previously on Spoz's Rant: New White Sneakers and The Clique

:: Spoz 2:48 PM |
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