:: SPOZ's RANT ::

 
The Adelaide scene: to many of you it may be little more than a touring speed bump between Melbourne and Perth but to us it's a way of life. Feast within, on all its dysfunctional splendour, as we bring you the highly satirical, laughingly fictional and intellectually imbecile tales from our rock & roll wasteland...

:: home | contact | patreon | bandcamp | spotify | youtube | twitter | instagram | facebook | weekly gig guide |

[::..latest blogs..::]
:: MAISIE, BUDDY J FRANCIS
and SAM PAGE; RICKY
ALBECK & THE BELAIR
LINE BAND (Single Launch)
w/ THE CONDOS and
MORTAL AMBITION
:: TUCKSHOP and
BRAVE MISTAKES; NIGHT
RITES and THE GENEVIEVES;
MODERN RELICS
(Single Launch) w/ THE MAX
HEADROOM; CARLA LIPPIS &
MONDO PSYCHO and BRIXX
:: SHODASHI, HEPÉ MATEH
and LIVE SLUG REACTION
:: SOYLENT GREEN,
WONDERWALLS JAM BAND
REVIVAL BAND and ADAM
PAGE; THUNDER SPEAKS
(Single Launch) w/ BREWER,
KILLING CENTRE, VERZANSKI,
NEW LIFE ODYSSEY and
MOUNTAIN SONGS
:: PIMPIN' HORUS
(Farewell Show) w/ TWITCH;
VELVET VOID, NORMAL
BEHAVIOUR and PELVIS
:: HALL OF FAME ::
:: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES** :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ARTAX MISSION :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND* :: BOOSTER :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CIRCLE CLAN :: COERCE :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: CONCHILLIA :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: DOUBLE HANDED* :: THE DUNES :: EGYPT :: ENCARTA / COLONEL KERNEL** :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA FIRE!*** :: FRIENDS :: GLASS SKIES :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT* :: THE HONEY PIES** :: HORROR MY FRIEND* :: ISLE OF VISION :: JUNGLE CITY :: KAMIKAZE :: THE KEEPSAKES* :: THE KILLGIRLS*** :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: LADY STRANGELOVE** :: LEADER CHEETAH* :: LIKE LEAVES** :: LUMONICS* :: LYLA :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS*** :: MERE THEORY :: MORALS OF A MINOR* :: THE MOTIVE :: MR WEDNESDAY** :: NO THROUGH ROAD*** :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: REALIST FEW :: RIDE INTO THE SUN** :: THE SEA THIEVES* :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS* :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY*** :: SKELETONS :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE* :: SONS OF ZOKU :: SPARKSPITTER* :: SQUEAKER :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: STEERING BY STARS* :: SWIMMING :: TEA :: THE TIMBERS :: TONY FONT SHOW** :: TRACER :: THE TRANSATLANTICS** :: TWO SUNS :: TYGER TYGER* :: THE VILLENETTES* :: WEST THEBARTON BROTHEL PARTY :: WOLF & CUB** :: ZETA ::
[::..rant awards..::]
:: 2008 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2009 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2010 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2011 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
:: RECOMMENDED ::
[::..global..::]
:: NME
:: SPIN
[::..local..::]
[::..blogosphere..::]
[::..miscellaneous..::]
:: XKCD
:: SITE FEATURES ::
[::..video blogs..::]
[::..festival blogs..::]
:: Fringe Festival 2012
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2013
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2015
- 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 |
5
| 6 | 7 | 8
:: Fringe Festival 2017
- 1 |
2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
[::..b&w episodes..::]
:: A Winter Wonderland
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
:: In Limbo - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7
:: B&W July 2012 - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8
:: society intermission
- 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

| 11
| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15
| 16
| 17 | 18 | 19 | 20
| 21 | 22 | 23 | 24
[::..special features..::]
:: ARTIST INDEX ::
:: !!! :: THE 1NE :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES (DUET) :: 200 MOTELS :: 4 KINGS LOUD :: 4 VOICE :: 67 SPECIAL :: THE 7.4.5. :: 78 SAAB :: A.B. ORIGINAL :: A.D.K.O.B. :: A FILM FOR THE FUTURE :: A GAZILLION ANGRY MEXICANS :: A RED DAWN :: A YOUNG MAN DRESSED AS A GORILLA DRESSED AS AN OLD MAN SITS ROCKING IN A ROCKING CHAIR FOR FIFTY-SIX MINUTES AND THEN LEAVES :: AAARRR! ALL ABOARD FOR PIRATEY VARIETY :: AARON THOMAS :: AARON THOMAS & THE HUMAN PATTERNS :: AARON THOMAS TRIO :: ABBEY HOWLETT :: ABBEY HOWLETT & THE GOLDEN REALM :: ABLACKWELL :: ABOLISHED :: ABRASKA :: ACID MOUNTAIN :: ACID WOLF :: ACROSS THE ATLAS :: ADALITA :: ADAM GEOFFREY COLE :: THE ADAM HIGGS FIELD SUPERCOLLIDER :: ADAM PAGE :: ADELAIDE'S PIPE GUY :: ADNAAN BARAKY :: ADRIAN BELEW :: ADRIAN DEUTSCH :: AFFAIRS OF MEN :: AFI :: AFTER THE FALL :: AGAPANTHER :: AIDAN J JONES :: AIRBOURNE :: ALANA JAGT :: ALANA JAGT & THE MONOTREMES :: ALARM BIRDS & THE SEA THIEVES :: ALBANY AVENUE :: ALDOUS HARDING :: ALEKSIAH :: ALEX K :: ALEX K & THE SPUTNIK SWEETHEARTS :: ALEXANDER BLACK :: ALIAS & THE JAMS :: ALISON COPPE :: ALISON COPPE & THE JANES :: ALITHIA :: ALL FLIGHT CREW ARE DEAD :: ALL MADE OF RUBIES :: ALL NIGHT GIRLS :: ALMA KALORAMA :: ALNITAK KID :: ALPEN :: ALPHA BETA FOX :: ALPHA STREET :: ALPHABETTE :: ALPINE :: ALREADY GONE :: ALRIGHT PSYCHO :: ALT. :: ALUKA :: AMBUSH MARKETING :: THE AMCATS :: AMENDS :: AMUNDSENS FLAG :: AMY SHARK :: ANCIENT DESIGN :: ANDERSON .PAAK & THE FREE NATIONALS :: ANDREW HIGGS & THE SAND CASTLE HARUM :: ANDREW MCCUBBIN feat. MELINDA KAY :: ANDREW P. STREET :: ANDY BULL :: ANDY ROBERTS :: ANGEL & THE BADMAN :: ANGEL EYES :: ANGEL OLSEN :: ANGELIK :: ANGELS OF GUNG-HO :: ANGIE HART :: ANIMAL SHADOWS :: ANIMAL TRAPS :: ANNIE BASS :: ANNIE OK :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ANNY DUFF :: ANTHONY ANT :: ANTHONY WIGNALL :: ANTI PSYCH :: ANTONY OF THE FUTURE :: ANTY! :: ANYA ANASTASIA :: ANYA ANASTASIA & THE BIRD WIZDOM CABARET :: ANYA MCNICOL-WINDRAM :: THE APE :: APHELION :: APPARITION :: APPOMATTOX RUN :: THE AQUARIAN MYSTERIES :: ARAKEYE :: THE ARCADE FIRE :: ARCHERS :: ARCHIE :: ARCHITECTURE IN HELSINKI :: ARE YOU DRINKING COMFORTABLY? :: ARGUS & THE LIAR :: ARIEL PINK'S HAUNTED GRAFFITI :: ARIES :: ARIES FLOW :: ARIS SPEED :: ARLO COOK :: ARMITAGE SHANKS :: ARMOUR FOU :: ARRAY :: ART OF ESCAPE :: THE ART OF FLYING KITES :: ARTAX MISSION :: AS THE PENNY DROPS :: THE ASTEROID BELT :: ASTRO ELEVATOR :: THE ATLANTIC STREET BAND :: ATLASIS & AMICA :: ATTILA MY HONEY :: ATOMIC SISTER :: ATTONBITUS :: ATTONBITUS (SOLO) :: AUBERON DANCE ACADEMY :: AUDIUM :: THE AUDREYS :: AUGUSTE :: AURA FORM :: AURORA :: THE AUTHENTIC REPLICAS :: AUXILLA :: AVANT GARDENERS :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: AWKWARD LOVE TRIANGLE :: AXE & THE IVORY :: BABES ARE WOLVES :: BABY CANDY :: BABY MO :: BABYLON BURNING :: BABYTEETH :: BACHELOR OF ARTS :: BACHELORETTE :: THE BACKYARDERS :: BACKSEAT ROMEOS :: BAD//DREEMS :: BAD LUCK CABARET :: BADBADNOTGOOD :: BADLAND CARAVAN :: THE BAIT FRIDGE :: BAKER BOY :: THE BAKER SUITE :: THE BAKER'S DIGEST :: BAKEWELL STREET :: BALL PARK MUSIC :: BANG! BANG! AIDS! :: BANJO JACKSON :: BANJO WEATHERALD :: BANOFFEE :: BARCODE :: THE BARON :: BARON VON DOODIE :: THE BARONS OF TANG :: BART'S NIGHTMARE :: BASEBALL :: THE BASKERVILLES :: A BASKET OF MAMMOTHS :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: BASTY & FRIENDS :: BASTY H :: BAT FOR LASHES :: BATHAWK :: BATPISS :: BATRIDER :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BATTLEHOUNDS :: BATTLE POPE :: BATTLES :: BEACH HOUSE :: BEACH LEECH :: BEANIE MY FRIEND :: BEAR THE MAMMOTH :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND :: THE BEARDS :: THE BEASTIE BOYS :: THE BEAUTIFUL MONUMENT :: BEC STEVENS :: BECCY ZAHO :: BED WETTER :: BEDHEAD :: THE BEDROOM PHILOSOPHER & HIS AWKWARDSTRA :: BEE PREFECT :: THE BEERBELLY BUSKERS :: BEFORE THE AFTERMATH :: THE BELAIR LIP BOMBS :: BELITTLE LEAGUE :: THE BELLE CURVE :: THE BELLRAYS :: BELOVED ELK :: BEN GEL & THE BONEYARD SAINTS :: BEN ELY'S RADIO 5 :: BEN REVI :: BEN REVI ALL-STAR REVIVAL BAND :: BEND :: BERMUDA BAY :: BETTY AIRS :: BIG BAD BARRY & THE DEAD SETS :: BIG DADDY'S DISCOTHEQUE :: BIG RICHARD INSECT :: BIG ROMANCE :: BIG SCARY :: BIG SKY THEORY :: BIG SLOE :: BIG TOWN :: BIG YAWN :: BIKE WRECK :: BILLIE EILISH :: BILLY BISHOP GOES TO WAR :: BILLY BOB'S BBQ JAM BAND :: BING GOES TO MONACO :: BINKY & THE BUNG MICS :: THE BIRD :: BIRD DETECTIVE :: BIRD WIZDOM :: BIRDS ARE SPIES :: BIRTHGLOW :: BIT BY BATS :: BITCH PREFECT :: BITCHSPAWN :: THE BITTER DARLINGS :: BITTER SWEET KICKS :: BJORK :: THE BLACK AND WHITE :: BLACK CHROME :: BLACK CORAL :: THE BLACK DOVES :: BLACK GOLD :: THE BLACK HEART DEATH CULT :: BLACK KNIGHT :: BLACK LIPS :: BLACK STONE FROM THE SUN :: BLACKCHORDS :: BLACKPENNY :: BLAKE SABAN 3 :: BLAST RHOMBUS :: THE BLEEDING FLARES :: BLEEDING KNEES CLUB :: THESE BLESSED BONES :: THE BLIND HERD :: BLISTERED PALMS :: BLOOMING :: BLOOD PLASTIC :: BLOOD SUCKING FREAKS :: BLOODHOUNDS ON MY TRAIL :: BLOODSTONE VILLAINS :: BLOW UP BETTY :: BLUE LUCY :: BLUE LUNACY :: BLUE SKY HOLIDAY :: THE BLUEBERRIES :: BLUEJUICE :: BLUSH :: BLUSH (SOLO) :: BLUSH RESPONSE :: BOB DOWNE :: BOB LOG III :: BODY HORROR :: BOHOEFFER :: THE BON SCOTTS :: BONG COFFIN :: BONOBO :: BOOBY TRAP :: A BOOGIE WIT DA HOODIE :: BOOMSKULLY :: BOOSTER :: THE BORDERLAND :: BORN LION :: BOS :: THE BOTANICALS :: THE BOTTLEROCKETS :: BOX ELDER :: THE BOX ROCKETS :: BOY YOUNG :: BRAVE MISTAKES :: BREE TRANTER :: BRENDAWG & THE DROID :: BRETT LITTLEFAIR :: BREWER :: THE BRIAN JONESTOWN MASSACRE :: BRIANNA MAHONEY :: BRIARS :: BRIDGET FAHEY :: BRIDGET FAHEY & THE BONE RATTLERS :: BRILLIG :: BRIT TRUEACK :: BRITISH INDIA :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS (DUO) :: BRIXX :: BROMHAM :: BRONZE CHARIOT :: BROKEN SOCIAL SCENE :: BROKERS :: THE BROTHERS GOON :: BROTHERSISTER :: THE BROUHAHA :: BRUNATEX :: BUCK IT :: BUDDY J FRANCIS :: BUFFALO BOYFRIEND :: THE BUMBLEBEEZ :: THE BUOYS :: BURAKA SOM SISTEMA :: BURIED FEATHER :: BURJON :: BURLESQUE BEAUTIES :: BURN THE ASHES :: BURNING BRIDGES :: THE BURNING SEA :: BURNING TOWER :: BURNSIDE MUMS :: BURNT FISH :: BUSHIDO :: BUSSEYS :: BUSTER FIDEZ :: BUTTERFLY SPINE :: BYE BYE MOUNTAIN :: BYSEA :: THE BYZANTINES :: C.H.O.P. ::CABBAGE & KINGS :: CABIN CULTS :: CABLE TIES :: CAGEFLY :: CAL WILLIAMS JR :: CALIFORNIA COUSIN :: CALLERDENIGHT :: CALLING ALL CARS :: CAM GOODALL :: CAMEROM MCTERNAN :: CAMP COPE :: CAN MASTER SMASH & MOTUS COLLECTIVE :: CANDIDA :: CANIDAE :: CANIS VULPES :: CAPTAIN CLEANOFF :: CAPTAIN HELLFIRE & THE WRETCHED BRETHREN :: THE CAPTAINS OF INDUSTRY :: CAPTIVES :: CAR SEAT HEADREST :: CARL DOVER & 3 DEEP :: CARLA LIPPIS & THE MARTIAL HEARTS :: CARLA LIPPIS & MONDO PSYCHO :: CAROLINE REID :: THE CASIO BROTHERS :: CASKET CASE :: CASS McCOMBS :: CASSETTE KIDS :: CAT DOG BIRD :: CAT LUCKY :: CAT PARTY :: CAUSING HAMMOCK :: CELESTITE :: CENTAURZ :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CERES :: CESARE :: CHAMP :: CHANCERY LANE :: CHAPMAN STREET :: CHARLIE MONSOON :: CHASING GHOSTS :: CHASING LANA :: CHASING PHOENIX :: THE CHATS :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CHEESE WORLD :: CHELSEA LEE :: CHELSEA MANOR :: CHERRY GRIND :: THE CHEVRON WHORES :: CHÉRIE DE KLERK :: CHILD :: CHILDREN COLLIDE :: CHINA CRISIS :: CHINA ROSES :: CHINESE NEW YEAR :: CHRIS FINNEN :: CHRIST DISMEMBERED :: CHORAL GRIEF :: CHOOSING SIDES :: CHURCH MOMS :: CHVRCHES :: CIARAM GRANGER :: CIRCLE CLAN :: CIRCUS ARCADE :: THE CITRADELS :: CITRUS JAM :: THE CITY :: CITY CALM DOWN :: CITY FEET :: CITY RIOTS :: THE CLANGERS :: CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH :: THE CLASHING PUMPKINS :: CLAY J GLADSTONE :: CLIENT LIASON :: THE CLIQUE :: CLOUD CONTROL :: CLOUD NOTHINGS :: CLOVER :: THE CLOWNS OF DECADENCE :: CLUB LOCK :: CLUE TO KALO :: COBRA :: COCK :: C.O.F.F.I.N :: CODRA NEGRA :: COERCE :: COG :: THE COLD FIELD :: COLDWAVE :: COLLARBONES :: COLLIDE/ESCAPE :: COLLIDER :: COLONEL KERNEL :: COLORBLIND :: COLOURBLIND :: COLOURBLIND DUO :: COLOURISE :: COLTER :: COLUMBUS :: CONCHILLIA :: THE CONDOS :: THE CONFESSIONALS :: CONOR DEERY :: CONSOLE WARRIORS :: COOKIE BAKER :: COOKIE BAKER & HER SPECIAL SECRET SPELLS :: COOL JUMPER :: COOL JUMPER & TANTIVY FAIR :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: COPIOUS DRIBBLE :: CORPUS :: THE CORTEX SHIFT :: CORTEZ :: COSMIC FOSSIL :: COSMIC SHEPHERD :: COSMO BLACK :: COSMO THUNDERCAT :: COSMO THUNDERCAT (DUO) :: COUNTERFEIT TRAITOR :: COURTNEY BARNETT :: THE COURTNEY LOVES :: COVE STREET :: COY CARP :: CRACKWHORE :: THE CRAVES :: THE CRAYON FIELDS :: CREEPERS :: CROSSFIRE HURRICANE :: CRUSTY SUITCASE BAND :: THE CRYING GAME :: CRYSTAL IGNITE :: CUB SCOUTS :: CUB SPORT :: CULL - THE BAND :: CURIOUS PALMS :: CURSES :: CUT COPY :: CUT OFF YOUR HANDS :: THE DAINTY MORSELS :: THE DAIRY BROTHERS :: DAISY BUCHANAN :: DAIYE SPA :: DALLAS FRASCA :: DALLI :: DAMN ARMS :: DAMN TERRAN :: DAMNED MEN :: DAMO SUZUKI NETWORK :: DAN DEVLIN :: DAN GASKIN :: DANCE TIL YOU CAN'T SAY YEAH! :: DANDY BUZZKILLS :: THE DANGER DOLPHINS :: DANGER & PLASTIC :: DANGEROUS! :: DANIEL VARRICCHIO :: DANIELE VILELLA :: DANVERS :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DAPPLED CITIES :: THE DARDANELLES :: DARK DAZE :: THE DARK LIGHTS :: DARTS OF PLEASURE :: DAS UBBERDUNG :: DAVE PHILLIPS :: DAVID BLUMBERG :: DAVID BLUMBERG & THE MARABY BAND :: DAY RAVIES :: DAYDREAM :: THE DAYLIGHT BRAVES :: DAYSWORTH FIGHTING :: THE DEAD BELLS :: DEAD END FRIENDS :: DEAD FRENCHMEN :: DEAD JOE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: THE DEAD REGULARS :: DEAD ROO :: DEADLY ARE THE NAKED :: DEAFAULT :: DEAN FOREVER :: DEAR PLASTIC :: DEATH BY CARROT :: DECOS :: DED//WESZ :: THE DEE MAJOR MYSTERY BAND :: DEEP SEA ARCADE :: THE DEER JOHNS :: DEERHUNTER :: DEJA :: DEJA ENTENDU :: DELIA OBST :: THE DELTA RIGGS :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DENTAL JAMS & EZROH :: DESCRIBE ELIZA :: DESERT CROOKS :: DESTINEZIA :: A DEVIL AMONGST THE TAILORS :: DEVIL ELECTRIC :: THE DEVILROCK FOUR :: DEXTER JONES :: DIAMOND SINS :: DIAMOND SKIES :: DIANA SCALZI :: DICK DIVER :: DIE! DIE! DIE! :: DIESEL WITCH :: DIETER HORVAT :: DIETER HORVAT & THE $5 MYSTERY SHOTS :: DIIV :: DILATED :: DILETTANTES :: DIPLOMAT :: DIPSTONE :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: THE DIRTY MONKS :: DIRTY PAGANS :: DIRTY WOLVES :: THE DIVINE FLUXUS :: DIZZEE RASCAL :: DJ KELE OKEREKE :: DJ SHADOW :: DJ SPOZ :: DJANGO ROWE QUARTET :: DJANGO ROWE TRIO :: DMA'S :: DOC DISORDERS :: DOCTOR TREK IN SPACE :: DOE :: DOM TRIMBOLI & THE WIZARDS :: DON MORRISON :: DONNARUMMA :: DON'T BRING STACEY :: DOOM POP :: DORKZ :: DOUBLE DENIM :: DOUBLE DRAGON :: DOUBLE HANDED :: DOWN & OUT :: DOZERS :: DR SURE'S UNUSUAL PRACTICE :: DRAINING :: DRAINING (ACOUSTIC) :: DRASTIC PARK :: DRAWN FROM BEES :: DREAM WIFE :: THE DREAMBOATS :: DRESS CODE :: DREW & SEAN :: DRILLER JET ARMSTRONG :: THE DRONES :: DROPLET :: DRUID FLUIDS :: DRUID FLUIDS (DUO) :: DRUNK MUMS :: DUD PILLS :: DUKES OF WINDSOR :: DUMB EARTH :: DUNE RATS :: THE DUNES :: DUNGEN :: DUSTY LEE :: DUSTY LEE & THE ANGELS OF GUNG HO :: DUSTY LEE'S BLUES JAM BAND :: DUSTY LEE'S WASTED WANDERERS :: DUZZMERALDA :: DYSPORA :: DZ :: DZ DEATHRAYS :: EARL SWEATSHIRT :: EAST BRUNSWICK ALL GIRLS CHOIR :: EAST END VILLAINS :: ECCENTRICK - FANTASY EDITION :: ECDYSIS :: ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN :: ECHO & THE EMPRESS :: EDDY CURRENT SUPPRESSION RING :: THE EFFENDS :: EFFIE :: EGYPT :: THE EL CAMINOS :: EL COLOSSO :: EL FARINHO :: ELECTRIC EXILES :: ELECTRIC FIELDS :: ELECTRIC SEX PANTS :: ELECTRIC WIDOWS :: ELENA & AIDAN CIBICH :: ELEPHANT :: ELEPHANT HIVE :: THE ELEVENTH HOUR :: THE E.L.F. :: ELK :: ELLA ION :: ELLEN KIBBLE :: ELLI BELLE :: THE ELLIOTT JOHNSON BAND :: EL BOTTLE O' PARADISO :: EL-P :: ELSY WAMEYO :: ELVIS :: EMDEE :: EMERAULD :: EMERGENCY RULE :: EMILY DAVIS :: EMILY DAVIS TRIO :: EMILY WYATT :: EMMA HORWOOD :: EMMA JAYNE :: EMPERORS :: EMPIRE VAGABOND :: THE EMPTY SLEEPS :: THE EMPTY THREATS :: ENCARTA :: ENDLESS NAMELESS :: ENEMY OF :: ENERGY ANGEL :: ENNIS TOLA :: ENVY STREET :: ER@SER DESCRIPTION :: ERIN BUKU :: ERIN MO :: ES IST SUPER :: ETHAN HUBBARD :: ETHANOL BLEND :: ETHANOL BLEND (DUO) :: EVEN :: EVERYDAY APATHY :: EXOTIC POTION COOKIES :: EXPATRIATE :: THE EXPLODERS :: EXPLODING PLASTIC INEVITABLE :: THE EXPLOSIONING :: EYES MORE SKULL THAN EYES :: EZRA HOPE :: FACEMEAT :: FACEMEAT - A ROCK OPERA :: FAFI D'ALOUR & THE DELINQUENTS :: FAIR CALL :: FAITH NO MORE :: FAIR MAIDEN :: THE FAK :: FAKE LAKE :: FAKE TAN :: FASCINATOR :: THE FAT SACK :: FAT TAILED ANTICHINUS :: FATHER JOHN MISTY :: FAVOUR THE BRAVE :: FEAR AND LOATHING :: THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS :: FEBRUARY CLOUDS :: FEIST :: FEMME FATALES :: FERGUS O'REGAN :: FEZ FAANANA :: THE FIDDLE CHICKS :: FIGHTERPILOT :: FILTHY LUCRE :: THE FINISHING SCHOOL :: FINNEN & DAVIDSON :: THE FINNS :: FIRS :: FISHING WITH HENRY :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA, FIRE! :: FIST PUMP, FIST BUMP :: FISTFUL OF TROJANS :: FKA TWIGS :: FLAVELLA L'AMOUR :: THE FLEEING MINDS :: FLEUR GREEN :: FLEUR GREEN & THE KEEPERS :: THE FLOORS :: FLORENCE & THE MACHINE :: FLUME :: THE FLYING SQUAD DUO :: FLYYING COLOURS DUO :: THE FOLKO-OH-NOES :: FONT PLAYS FONT :: FOOL'S IDOL :: FORCES :: FOREIGN/NATIONAL :: FOREST OF GNOMES :: FORMER CHILD STARS :: FOX FAEHRMANN :: FOXX ON FIRE :: FRANKIE SUNWAGON :: FRANZ FERDINAND :: FRAUD MILLIONAIRES :: FREE DRINKS :: FREESTATE :: FRESH KILLS :: FRIDAY'S FOX :: FRIENDS :: FROM THE DEAD SEA :: FULL CONTACT SAFARI :: FULL TONE GENERATOR :: THE FUMES :: FUNK LATIN UNION :: FUNKOARS :: FUNKY C FUNKY DO :: FUTURE FARM :: FUTURE ISLANDS :: THE FYOOGS :: G FLIP :: GALAPAGOOSE :: GALAXY CAT :: GALLEON :: GALLERY ONE :: GANG OF YOUTHS :: GARDEN RUIN :: GAVIN DE ALMEIDA :: GAY PARIS :: THE GELS :: GEMINI DOWNS :: GEMMA THORNE :: GENERATION SWINE :: THE GENEVIEVES :: GEORDIE LITTLE :: GEORGE GLASS :: GEORGIA NIELSEN :: GERMEIN SISTERS :: GET SOME :: GG ALAN BINDIG :: GHOST THIEF :: GHOST WALK :: GHOUL :: GHYTI :: GHYTI (DUO) :: GHYTI & THE PHILANTHROPIC ORCHESTRA :: GINDIANA BONES AND THE SEVERAL KIDNEYS OF THE UNDERGROUND TRAIN STATION :: GINFOX VS HELLO NEWMAN :: GIRL :: GIRL TALK :: THE GIVEAWAYS :: GLASS :: GLASS DUNES :: GLASS SKIES :: GLASS TOWERS :: GLEN AVENTI :: GLENN OSMOND & THE FULLARTONES :: GLISK :: GLITORIS :: GLOWING :: GNARLS BARKLEY :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT (Lounge Set) :: GOLD BLOOM :: THE GOOD CHINA :: GOOD BOY :: GOODBYE, MOTHER LEOPARD :: GOONBOMB :: GOON WIZARRD :: GOTYE :: GRACE: THE SONGS OF JEFF BUCKLEY :: GRACE CUMMINGS :: GRACE GOODFELLOW :: GRAFTON PRIMARY :: GRAFTON STREET :: THE GRAND RAPIDS :: GRASSHOPPER & THE BUTTERFROGS :: THE GRATES :: GRAVEYARD TRAIN :: GREAT GABLE :: GREEN CIRCLES :: GREENLEAF :: THE GREETING METHOD :: GRENADIERS :: GREY DATURAS :: GRIMES :: GRIMEY :: GROOVE ARMADA :: GROUND COMPONENTS :: THE GROWL :: GUILLAUME SOLO ACOUSTIC :: GUINEAFOWL :: GUN IT :: GÜNTER & THE SAFEWORD :: GYRO :: HÄGÖL :: HAIM :: HAL BIRD :: HALCYON DRIVE :: HALFWAY TO FORTH :: HANA & JESSIE-LEE'S BAD HABITS :: HANNAH FAIRLAMB :: HANNAH YATES :: THE HAPPY ENDINGS :: HAPPY SOMETIMES :: HAR MAR SUPERSTAR :: THE HARD ACHES :: HARD RUBBISH :: HARMLESS HUNTER :: HARMONY :: HARRY FREEMAN :: HARTS :: HARTWAY :: HARVEY RUSSELL :: HAWKS OF ALBA :: HAYSTACKS CALHOON :: HAZY J & THE WASTED DAZE :: HEAPS GOOD FRIENDS :: HEARTLINE :: HEATH WEBER :: THE HEGGARTIES :: HEINOUS CRIMES :: HEKYL :: HELLO ENEMY :: HELLO, LOVER :: HELLO NEWMAN :: HELLS HOIST :: HELMET :: HENRY WILSON :: HEPÉ MATEH :: HESTON DROP :: HEY FEVER :: HEY HARRIETT :: HEY LADY! :: HI, I'M RECLUSIVE AUTHOR THOMAS PYNCHON :: HIDDEN INTENT :: THE HIGH BEAMERS :: HIGH STAKES :: HIGH TENSION :: HIGH VIOLET :: HIGHTIME :: HILLS & TRAINS :: HIT THE JACKPOT :: HOCKEY DAD :: HOFMANN & THE COSMONAUTS :: THE HOLD STEADY :: THE HOLIDAYS :: HOLLY HASTINGS :: HOLOGRAPHIC CHARIZARD :: HOLOGRAPHIC COLTS :: HOLY FORREST :: HOLY FUCK :: HOLY HOLY :: THE HOLY SEA :: HOLY SERPENT :: HOME COURT :: HOME FOR THE DEF :: HOMELY SMELLS :: THE HONEY PIES :: HONEYBEAM :: HORROR MY FRIEND :: HORSE LORDS :: HOSPITAL THE MUSICAL :: HOT MESS :: HOT WINGS :: HOUSE IN THE TALL GRASS :: HOUSE OF JADE :: HOWL AT THE MOON :: HOWL N' BONES :: HOWLING BELLS :: THE HOWLING FOG :: HUBRIS :: HUMBLE BEE :: HUMMINGBIRD :: HUMPHREY B. BEAR :: HUNGRY KIDS OF HUNGARY :: THE HUNTED CROWS :: HURRICANE JANE :: HURRICANES :: THE HUSHES :: HUSTLE HOUSE :: HUXLEY :: THE HYDES :: HYDROMEDUSA :: I, A MAN :: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT WEEZER :: I HEART HIROSHIMA :: I, ICARUS :: ICE ON MERCURY :: ID :: IDLY BY :: IGGY POP & THE STOOGES :: IIAH :: ILLICIT EVE :: IMMIGRANT UNION :: IMOGEN BRAVE :: IMPARTIAL :: THE IMPOSSIBLE QUICHE :: THE INCHES :: INDIAGO :: INSOMNICIDE :: INSTITUT POLAIRE :: INTERCOOLER :: INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF MOJO :: THE INTERNET :: INTERPOL :: INTERSECTION :: INTERZONE EXPRESS :: INTROVERT :: INUETTE :: INWOODS :: IRAAN SANADZADEH :: IRIDIUM :: IRIE KNIGHTS :: THE IRRESPONSIBLES :: ISAAC THOMAS :: ISLE OF CAPRI :: ISLE OF VISION :: IT'S A HOAX :: IT'S A HOAX (INSTRUMENTAL) :: IT'S NOT A PHASE :: IT'S WARSAW :: IVORY :: THE JAY WALKERS :: J-LO BIAFRA :: J-WAH :: JACK HARLON & THE DEAD CROWS :: JACK LONDON :: JACKSON FIREBIRD :: JACKULSON :: JAMES HICKEY :: JAMES PARRY :: JANE'S ADDICTION :: JAPAM :: JAPANDROIDS :: JAPANTHER :: JARVIS :: JARVIS COCKER :: JASON KATSARAS :: JASON SIMON (DEAD MEADOW) :: JAY WALKER AND THE PEDESTRIANS :: JAYNE-ANNE POWER :: JEFF MARTIN & TEREPAI RICHMOND :: JESS DAY :: JESS JOHNS :: JESS KENT :: JESS PORTER :: JESSE DAVIDSON :: JESSE DAVIDSON BAND :: JESSE FRANCIS :: JESSICA RAE :: JESUS CHRIST POSSE :: JETTISON :: THE JEZABELS :: JIKA :: JIMMY & THE MIRRORS :: JIMMY EAT WORLD :: JIMMY MARIN :: JIMMY MOUNTAIN :: JIMMYBAY :: JIMMYBAY & OLLIE KABBANI :: JODECI & SAM :: JOE MCKEE :: JOEL STERN :: JOEL STERN, CURED PINK & TIMOTHY TATE :: THE JOHN STEEL SINGERS :: JOHNNY AMERICAN HORSE :: JOHNNY SEAGULL & THE HOT CHIPS :: JON ADDAMS :: JON ANN :: JON MARCO :: JON MORTIMER :: JONGO BONES & THE BAREFOOT BANDITS :: JONNY BLIZZARD :: JORDAN TITO :: JOSH CALLIGEROS :: JOSHUA JAMES MORPHETT :: JOURNEY WELL SPACE WIZARD :: JOY & SPARKS :: JP COE & THE DELEGATES :: JUDGE MENTAL :: JULIETTE SEIZURE & THE TREMOR DOLLS :: JUMP OVER FENCES :: JUMP! YOU REVOLUTIONARY :: JUNGLE CITY :: JUNGLEMIRE :: JUNIOR V :: JUPITER :: JUPITER (DUO) :: JUPITER LEAD :: JUST DESSERTS :: KAB SAVVY :: KACEY STEPHENSEN :: KAHL WALLIS :: KÁLI SAVILL :: KAMIKAZE :: KAMIKAZE TRIO :: KANGAROO SKULL :: KARL MELVIN :: KASABIAN :: KASAVETT :: KATE VIGO & THE UNDERGROUND ORCHESTRA :: KATIE BRIANNA :: KATIE MILLER :: KATIE POMERY :: KAURNA CRONIN :: THE KAVS :: KAZKARIV :: THE KEEPSAKES :: KELLIE LLOYD :: KELLY MENHENNETT :: KELSHY :: KEMP BROTHERS :: KETTERING :: KHAN :: KIAN :: KICKASS COWGIRLS :: KID SAM :: KIDS IN CULTS :: KIDS WITH TEETH :: KIKUYU :: THE KILL DEVIL HILLS :: KILLED BY CUPID :: KILLER BIRDS :: THE KILLBOT FACTORY :: THE KILLGIRLS :: KILLING CENTRE :: KING DADDY :: KING GIZZARD & THE LIZARD WIZARD :: KING JEFF & THE HOW ARE YOUS :: KING KRILL :: KING KRULE :: KING OF THE NORTH :: KINGS WITHIN :: KINGSTON DOWNES :: KINGSWOOD :: KINS :: KIRK SPECIAL :: KIRK WATT :: KITCHEN WITCH :: KITTEN KONG :: KITTYHAWK :: KLLO :: KOI CHILD :: KOLEH :: KORAL :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: KOSHER SALAMI :: KOTARA :: KRIS WANDERS :: KRISTINA MILTIADOU :: KUČKA :: KURRULTA PARK :: KURT VILE :: KYLE CHARLES HALL :: KYLIE BRICE TRIO :: KYM RÖBEY & THE DEVIL'S LETTUCE :: KYRI :: KYTES OF OMAR :: L.R. MARSH :: LA FEMME LE FEVER :: LACHY BRUCE :: LADY GUNG-HO & THE ANGELS OF STRANGELOVE :: LADY STRANGELOVE :: THE LADYBEATLES :: LADYHAWKE :: LAHARA :: LANCE LAZER & TALIBAND :: LARSEN :: LAST DAYS OF KALI :: LAST DINOSAURS :: LAST THYLACINE :: THE LAST SUPPER :: LATE NIGHT LIES :: LATE NIGHT MATINEE :: LATER THAT NIGHT :: LAURA HILL :: LAURA IMBRUGLIA :: LAUREN ABINERI :: LAW & DISORDER :: LAZARO'S DOG :: LC3'S :: LEAD WORM :: LEADER CHEETAH :: LEAF & STEM :: LEFT :: LEFT ON SEEN :: LEGENDS OF MOTORSPORT :: LEIGHSTARDUST :: THE LEITMOTIF :: LEITMOTIV LIMBO :: LIVE SLUG REACTION :: LEITH JAMES :: LE GATEAU CHOCOLAT :: LEMMINGS :: LEMURIAN :: LENI :: LENIN MCCARTHY :: LEO :: LEAPING FELIX :: LES SAVY FAV :: THE LEVITATORS :: LEX MONSERRAT :: LICKITY SPLIT :: LIFE IN LETTERS :: LIGHTS :: LIKE KITES :: LIKE LEAVES :: LIL VALENTINE :: LILAC COVE :: LILY MOJITO :: LILY ROSE :: LILLY SIM :: LILLYS RADIO :: LIMB KING :: LIMBS AKIMBO :: LINE HONOURS :: LIPSMACK :: LITTLE BRIDGET :: LITTLE CAPTAIN :: LITTLE DRAGON :: LITTLE DUST :: LITTLE ICE AGE :: LITTLE PRINCE :: LITTLE TWO EYES :: THE LIZARDS :: LLAMAGEDDON :: LLEWELLYN THOMAS :: LO! :: LOADED LEOPARD :: LOCAL REVOLUTION :: LOEMAX :: THE LOFTY MOUNTAIN BAND :: LOLA :: THE LONDON ROAD POETS :: THE LONELINESS OF A MIDDLE DISTANCE RUNNER :: LONELY FIRE :: LONELYSPECK :: LONG WALK HOME :: LONI RAE :: LOOCH :: LOON LAKE :: LOOPOLE :: LORDE :: LOREN KATE :: LOS PALMS :: LOST COSMONAUT :: LOST IN TRANSLATION :: THE LOST SHOW :: LOST VALENTINOS :: LOST WOODS :: LOUIS DONNARUMMA :: LOUIS FARK :: LOUISE ADAMS :: LOUISE & THE TORNADOS :: LOUISE ADAMS & THE FRINGE DWELLERS :: LOVE CREAM :: THE LOVE JUNKIES :: LOVE OF DIAGRAMS :: LOVE STEREO :: LOVE ZOMBIES :: THE LOVES :: LUCI :: LUCINDA GRACE :: THE LUCKSMITHS :: LUCY THE BAND :: LUCY ZOLA :: LUKE ASHBY BAND :: LUKE CARLINO :: LUKE DUX :: LUKE ESCOMBE :: LUKE EYGENRAAM :: LUKE GOLDING :: THE LUKE LOUIE TRIO :: LUMENS :: LUMONICS :: MABIINA PARTY :: LYLA :: MAC DEMARCO :: MACH PELICAN :: MACKENZIE :: MAD SHAPES :: MADCLASSIC :: MADURA GREEN :: MAGGIE & LOUIS :: THE MAGGIE PILLS :: MAGIC BONES :: MAGIC MOUNTAIN :: THE MAGNETS :: MAISIE :: MAISIE B :: MAJOR SHADE :: MAKING :: MALLRAT :: MAMMAL :: MAMMOTH :: MAMMOTH LOGIC :: THE MAN HIMSELF :: MANE :: MANI NEUMEIER & THE BITCHES OF ZEUS :: MANNEQUIN DEATH SQUAD :: MANNIX :: MANOR :: MANSIONAIR :: MÄNTRÄ :: THE MARABY BAND :: MARCUS COROWA :: MARCUS WARNECKE & SAM PORTER :: MARDEN :: MARGARET LLOYD & SEB TONKIN :: MARK CURTIS :: MARK CURTIS BAND :: MARK CURTIS & THE FLANNELETTES :: MARLA SINGER :: MARY TREMBLES :: MARY WEBB :: MASEGO :: MASSIVE :: MASTER'S CURIOUS DELIRIUM :: THE MATEHS :: MATHEMATIC :: MATHIEU WERCHOWSKI :: MATT BANHAM :: MATTHEW BARLOW :: MATT HAYWARD :: MATTHEW MILES :: MATT WARD DUO :: MATT WARD & THE RISING SONS :: MATT ZENGERER :: MAUVE :: THE MAX HEADROOM :: MAX SAVAGE :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS :: MAYDAY FAIR :: MAYFIELD :: MCKISKO :: MEAKE :: MEANWELL COLLEGE :: THE MEDICS :: MEGAFAUNA :: MELLOW YELLOW :: MELTON PEACH :: MEMORY CASTLES :: MENAGERIE :: MERCY ARMS :: THE MERCY KILLS :: MERE THEORY :: THE MESS HALL :: MESSRS :: METHYL ETHEL :: METZ :: MEZZA, ROACH & HOG :: MEZZANINE :: MICHAEL STOWERS :: MICHAELA JENKE :: MICK ARMSTRONG, ANDY ARMSTRONG & STAN BASTIRAS :: THE MIDDLE EAST :: MIDDLE KIDS :: MIDNIGHT JUGGERNAUTS :: THE MIDNIGHT MARES :: THE MILTON EXPERIENCE :: MIKE MCKEON :: MIKE RADZEVICIUS :: MIKE TILBROOK :: MIKEY (EX ARTAX MISSION) :: MINDSHOWER :: MIO :: MIRRORLINE :: THE MISCHIEF :: MISCHIEF THE CAT :: MISS GOLLY GOSH :: MISS OHIO :: MISS RENEE SIMONE :: THE MISSION IN MOTION :: MM9 :: MODERN DAY RIOT :: MODERN RELICS :: MOGERLAINE :: MOLLY ROCKET :: THE MOLTING VULTURES :: MOMOKO SODA :: MONA LISA OVERDRIVE :: THE MONDAYS :: MONDO PHASE BAND :: MONEY FOR ROPE :: THE MONIKERS :: MONKEY PUZZLE TREE :: THE MONSTER SOCIETY OF EVIL :: MONTES JURA :: MOODY BELLES :: THE MOON DIGITS :: MOONFAKER :: MOONHUNTER :: MORALS OF A MINOR :: THE MORNING AFTER GIRLS :: THE MORS :: THE MORS MODERN MYSTERY SEXTET :: MORTAL AMBITION :: MORTAL WOMBAT :: MOSES SUMNEY :: MOSHPIT GIRLFRIEND :: MOTHER'S CAKE :: THE MOTHERFUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS :: MOTHERSLUG :: THE MOTION BELOW :: THE MOTIVE :: MOTOWN CONNECTION :: MOUNT SELDOM :: MOUNTAIN SONGS :: MOUNTAIN STATIC :: MOUNTAIN STRANGER :: MOUNTAINS IN THE SKY :: MOUNTBATTEN :: MOURGOS GRUND :: THE MOURNING SONS :: MOVE TO STRIKE :: MOVIN' MELVIN BROWN :: M.J. TURNER :: MR. INDUSTRY :: MR ROSEWATER :: MR WEDNESDAY :: MULE :: MUM FRIENDS :: MUM THINKS BLUE :: MUMS FAVOURITE :: MUM'S TENNIS FRIENDS :: MUMFORD & SONS :: THE MUNCH :: MUNCHKIN :: MUSCLE CAR VS HIGH STAKES :: THE MUSHNIKS :: MUSTERED COURAGE :: MUTEMATH :: MY CHÉRIE :: MY DISCO :: MY SISTER THE COP :: MYLES MAYO :: MYSTERY SEA CREATURE :: N.A.S.A. :: NAKATOMI :: NANCY BATES :: NAOMI KEYTE :: NAOMI KEYTE & TANNON KEW :: NATHAN KAYE :: NATHAN MAY :: NATHANAEL ROTHWELL :: NAZZ AND THE RED PONIES :: NELD :: NEO FIX :: NEOHIP :: NEON BOGART :: NEON ELECTRIC :: NEON TETRA :: NEREEDA :: NERVOUS GERBAL :: THE NEW CABAL :: NEW LIFE ODYSSEY :: NEW PANTS :: NEW POLLUTANTS :: NEW TRANSLATION :: NEWGATE CROWD :: NICK MURPHY ::THE NEW VAGUE :: NEW WHITE SNEAKERS :: NEW YORK DOLLS :: NEWTONHEATH :: NICHOLAS ALLBROOK :: NICK OLIVERI :: NICK OLIVERI & FILTHY LUCRE :: NICK VULTURE :: NICKER TEENS :: NICŌ SAKŪRASŪKÉ :: NIGEL KOOP & STEVIE BEE :: NIGHT RITES :: NIKAI :: NIKKO :: NIKKO & SNOOKS :: NINA MCCANN :: NIPSLIP :: NITIDUS :: NO BIRDS :: NO LEMMIN :: NO NO NO NO NO :: NO THROUGH ROAD :: NO ZU :: NOBODY KNEW THEY WERE ROBOTS :: NOCTURNAL ANIMALS :: NONA MONA :: NORMAL BEHAVIOUR :: NOT FOR HUMANS :: THE NOVOCAINES :: NTH RD :: NUCLEAR FAMILY :: THE NURSERY - BABY DRAG NIGHT :: NUSEUM :: NUSSY :: NUVO :: THE NYMPHS :: O' LITTLE SISTER :: OATH OF DAMNATION :: OCEAN ALLEY :: THE OCEAN PARTY :: OCEANICS :: ODYSSEY :: THE OFFCUTS :: OH MERCY :: OH MINOR :: OH MY GUARD! :: OIL! :: OISIMA :: OKKERVIL RIVER :: OKO :: OLD MATE :: OLIVER CARR'S CARR ACCIDENT :: OLIVER TREE :: OLIVERS ARMY :: OLLIE ENGLISH :: OLLIE KABBANI :: OLLY HOLMES :: OMERTIA :: ONE THOUSAND COUPLES :: ONION :: ONLY OBJECTS :: ONNIE ART :: THE ORBWEAVERS :: ORELIA :: ORIANE & KALIOPI :: ORPHAN OF KOS :: OSCAR THE WILD :: THE OSCILLATORS :: OSH10 :: OUTSIDE LINES :: OVERVIEW EFFECT :: OWLS OF THE SWAMP :: PABLO LIBIDO & THE WHITE ROBOTS :: THE PACKETS :: PAGAN :: PAIGE RENEE COURT :: PALACE OF THE KING :: PALEFACE :: THE PANDA BAND :: PANACEA :: PANOPTIQUE ELECTRICAL :: PAPA VS PRETTY :: PAPER ARMS :: THE PAPER SCISSORS :: PAPER SNORKEL :: PAPER SUNSETS :: PARADES :: PARADISE CLUB :: PARTY :: PARTY DOZEN :: PAT THE RAT :: PATRIARCHAL DEATH MACHINE :: PATRICK SARACINO :: PAUL KELLY :: PEACH FUR :: PEACHES & HERM :: PEABODY :: PEANUT BUTTER CRACK BABIES :: PEARL TIZZIE :: PELVIS :: PEMBERTON :: PENELOPE SUICIDE :: PENNY IKINGER :: PERFECT PUSSY :: PERSIA & THE GEORGE GRIFSAS QUARTET :: PEST CONTROL :: THE PET SHOP BOYS :: PETER COMBE :: THE PHARAOHS :: PHI THEODOROS :: PHILADELPHIA GRAND JURY :: THE PHOBIAS :: PHOENIX :: PIERS DIPROSE :: PIMPIN' HORUS :: PINK DUKE :: PINK NOISE GENERATOR :: PINK WASABI :: PINKISH BLU :: PINKY BEECROFT & THE WHITE RUSSIANS :: PIPE GUY :: PIPE GUY VS BUCK IT :: PIRATE COWBOY :: PIST IDIOTS :: PISTOL SHRIMP :: THE PITS :: PITY LIPS :: PIVOT :: THE PIXIES :: PLACEBO :: PLACEMENT :: PLAGUE KEEPER :: PLANET CACTUS :: PLANET OF THE 8S :: THE PLEASURE OF BOOKS :: PLUG IN CITY :: PNAU :: POCKET ACE :: THE PODS INTERROBANG :: POETIKOOL JUSTICE :: POLADROIDS :: POLY & THE STATICS :: POND :: PONY DANCE :: PONYTAIL KINK :: THE POP-UPS :: POPY JANE :: POPEYE & OLIVE OYL :: PORCHLIGHT PARADE :: PORT HONEY :: POST DEATH POST :: POWER SPRITES :: PREHISTORIC DOUCHE :: THE PRESETS :: PRESTON'S HISTORIC PUNCH & JUDY SHOW :: PRETTY UGLY :: PRINCE RAMA :: PRINCESS ONE POINT FIVE :: PROBLEMS :: THE PRODIGY :: THE PRO-TOOLS :: THE PROPHETS OF IMPENDING DOOM :: PSYCHEDELIC P*RN CRUMPETS :: PSYCHIC 5 :: PSYCHO DEREK & THE RE-ISSUES :: THE PSYCHONAUTS :: PUBLIC HOLIDAY :: THE PUBLIC SERVANTS :: PUNK JAZZ MONORAIL :: PURÉE :: PURITY RING :: PURR :: PUT DOWNS :: PSYCHOBABEL :: QUA :: QUANTUM CHAOS :: QUARTZ PISTOL :: QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE :: QUEBEC ECHO :: QUEST :: QUESTION QUESTION :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: QUIET TRAMSTOP :: RACCOON CITY :: RACHEL CEARNS :: RACHEL CEARNS & THE VALKYRIES :: RADIANT CITY :: RADICALS :: RADIO SPECTACULAR!!! :: RADIO STAR :: RADIX :: RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE :: THE RAGING POPULATION :: RAINDROP :: RAMA RAMA :: RAPID TRANSPORT :: RAPSCALLION :: THE RAPTURE :: RAT CATCHER :: RAT TA'MANGO :: RAUCOUSTRA :: RAURY :: THE RAVEONETTES :: RAY MANTA :: THE READYMADES :: THE REAL MAC :: REALIST FEW :: REALM :: RED APPARITION :: RED COATS :: RED DESERT OCEAN :: THE RED EARTH BLUES BAND :: RED INK :: THE RED PAINTINGS :: RED SEA :: THE RED SUN BAND :: REGIONALS :: REGULAR JOHN :: REGURGITATOR :: RELYING ON LUCK :: REJUSA :: THE REMEMBERZ :: RENDEZVOUS WITH RAMA :: THE REPROBETTES :: REPTILES :: RETRIEVER :: REVERSES :: REX ORANGE COUNTY :: RICH DAVIES & AYLEEN O'HANLON :: RICH DAVIES & THE LOW ROAD :: RICHARD BECK GROUP :: RICHARD IN YOUR MIND :: RICKY ALBECK & THE BELAIR LINE BAND :: RICKY KICKONS ALLSTAR JAM :: RICOCHET PETE :: RIDE INTO THE SUN :: RIFFWRATH :: RIN MCARDLE :: RIN & THE RECKLESS :: RINCON :: RINGO STALIN :: RIOT RUNNERS :: RIPCORD :: RISEMANN :: RITES WILD :: RIVER OF SNAKES :: RMJ :: ROAD WINGS :: ROB EDWARDS :: ROBOTOSAURUS :: ROCKET SCIENCE :: THE ROCKETEERS :: ROCKY'S PRIDE & JOY :: ROGER THAT :: ROGUE ROMANTIC :: THE ROLLBACKS :: THE ROLLERCANES :: ROLLING BLACKOUTS COASTAL FEVER :: ROMANA ASHTON & THE REEDS :: RON THE OX :: THE ROOFTOPS :: ROOK :: RORY O'CONNOR :: ROSE CLOUSEAU :: ROSEMONT :: ROSS DE CHENE HURRICANES :: ROTE MARE :: ROWENA :: ROYAL BLOOD :: THE ROYAL GALA :: ROYAL HEADACHE :: THE RUBENS :: RUBY FIELDS :: RULE OF THIRDS :: THE RULES :: RUN THE JEWELS :: RUNEBILLY RATTLE :: RUNNING WITH HORSES :: RUNNING WITH SCISSORS :: RUNZELSTIRM & GURGLESTOCK :: RURU 432 :: RURU 432 & NU ARTICLE :: RUSSIA :: RUSSIAN TEAMMATE :: RYAN MARTIN JOHN :: RYAN MEEKING & THE FEW :: RYAN OLIVER :: SACRED SHRINES :: SAILMAKER :: SAILORS AND SWINE :: SAINT HUCK :: SAINT JACQUES :: SAINT JACQUES DUO :: THE SALVADORS :: SAM PAGE :: SAM WOOLFORD :: SAMPA THE GREAT :: SAN CISCO :: THE SAN SEBASTIAN :: SARAH BLASKO :: SARAH CHADWICK :: SASHA MARCH :: SASHA MARSH & THE DAWNHORSE :: SASKWATCH :: SATAN'S CHEERLEADERS :: SATIN HAREM :: SATIN SUN :: SAUL WILLIAMS :: SAVAGES :: SAVING SAVANAH :: SAWCY PAWS :: THE SCARE :: THE SCARFS :: THE SCARLET IVES :: SCHOOL OF RADIANT LIVING :: THE SCOUNDRELS :: SCREAMFEEDER :: SCREAMING GIBBON :: SE BON KI RA :: THE SEA THIEVES :: SEA URCHIN & ALLIES :: SEABASS :: SEABELLIES :: SEAMUS ANTHONY :: SEAN DESMOND :: SEAN KEMP :: SECRETS IN SCALE :: SEEKAE :: SERAPHINA SINCLAIR :: SERENDIPITY :: SERGIO MIMOSA & THE BING BANG BOOM FIVE :: THE SERRA :: SEVENTEEN FIFTY SEVEN :: SEX ON TOAST :: SEX WIZARD :: SEX UNCLE :: SEXUAL DAD :: THE SEXY BOYS BLUES BAND :: THE SHADOW LEAGUE :: THE SHADOW MINISTERS :: SHADOWQUEEN :: THE SHAHS :: THE SHAKE UP :: SHAMAN EYES :: SHAMAN SON :: THE SHAMBOLICS :: SHAME SPIRAL :: SHAME :: SHANGHAI WENDY :: SHANGRILA :: THE SHAOLIN AFRONAUTS :: SHAPES DIVIDE :: SHARK IN THE DARK :: SHE SAID YOU :: SHE'S THE BAND :: SHILOH :: THE SHINE :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS :: SHIVERS :: SHODASHI :: SHOJI HANO :: SHORT GILLIGAN :: SHY RHINO :: SIAMESE :: SIANNA LEE :: SIBERIAN TIGER :: SIDEWALKS :: S.I.G.I.T. :: SILENT DUCK :: THE SILENTS :: SIMON & JENNY :: SIMON ABERLE :: SIMPLE PLEASURES :: SIN CITY :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY :: SIR GERBIL :: SISTER ROSE :: SITARA :: THE SKATEGOATS :: THE SKELETON CLUB :: SKELETONS :: SKIES :: SKINPIN :: SKIPPING GIRL VINEGAR :: SKYBOMBERS :: SKYLA :: SKYTHIEF :: SKYE HARBOUR :: SLAMAGOTCHI :: SLAVE GIRLS FROM BEYOND INFINITY :: SLEEP PARADE :: SLEEP TALK :: SLEEPTALKER :: THE SLEEPY JACKSON :: SLICK ARNOLD :: SLICKER DRIPS :: SLINGSHOT DRAGSTER :: SLIPPERY PEOPLE :: THE SLOE RUIN :: SLOWDIVE :: SLOWMANGO :: SLOWLY SLOWLY :: SLY HATS :: SMALL AFFAIRS :: SMASHING PUMPKINS :: SMILE :: THE SMITH STREET BAND :: THE SMITHS vs RADIOHEAD :: THE SMOCKS :: SMOKE NO FIRE :: SMUDGE STAIN :: SNAKADAKTAL :: SNAP TO ZERO :: SNAPDRAGON :: THE SNOWDROPPERS :: SNOWMAN :: SO.CRATES :: ...SO YEAH :: SODA :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE :: SOJOURN :: SOMNIUM :: SOMNIUM DUO :: SOMMNIUM :: SONATINE :: THE SONGS OF TOM SMITH :: SONIC DEATH MONKEY :: SONS OF SERPENT :: SONS OF ZÖKU :: SOUR SOB :: SOURSOB BOB :: SOURSOP :: SOUTH FROM SOMEWHERE :: THE SOUTH SEASON :: SOUTHPAW :: SOUTHPOOR :: SOYLENT GREEN :: SPACE COYOTE :: SPACEY JANE :: SPANK ROCK :: SPARKSPITTER :: SPARTAK :: SPECIAL PATROL :: SPEED MACHINE :: SPIKE THE RIVER :: SPILT CITIES :: SPINDICKLE :: SPINE :: THE SPIRES :: SPORTS CAR :: SPOZ SPOZINGTON :: SQUARE :: SQUEAKER :: ST JUDES :: ST. LOKI :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: ST. VINCENT :: STABBITHA & THE KNIFEY WIFEYS :: STACY SAYS :: THE STAIN DRAINS :: STANDARD UNION :: STARS :: STARS YOUNG :: STATE LIBRARY :: THE STEADY ONS :: STEEL TIGER :: STEERING BY STARS :: STEFAN HAUK :: STELLIE :: STEREOLAB :: STEVE SMYTH :: STICKY BEAK :: THE STIFFYS :: THE STILL MOVEMENT :: STISSED :: STOKES :: STONE EYES :: STONEFIELD :: STONEGRILL :: STOP SAYING HELICOPTER :: THE STORM WILL COVER OUR TRACKS :: STORMHORSE :: STORMY-LOU :: STRAIGHT TO VIDEO :: THE STRAIGHT-JACKET TAILORS :: STRAWBRY BLONDE :: STREET LEGAL :: STREETLIGHT :: STREGA :: STRIPES. :: THE STRIPP :: STU DANIELS :: STURT AVENUE :: SUBAUDIBLE HUMM :: SUBMERGE :: SUBTRACT S :: SUBURBAN STANDOFF :: SUGAR ARMY :: SUGAR TONGUE :: SUMI :: SUMMER BLOOD :: SUMMER FLAKE :: THE SUN AND THE SKY :: THE SUNBIRDS :: THE SUNDANCE KIDS :: THE SUNDAY REEDS :: THE SUNDIALS :: THE SUNDIALS PODCAST :: SUNDOWNER :: SUNK LOTO :: SUNSET CITIES :: SUNSETTLER :: SUNSICK DAISY :: SUPER XX MAN :: SUPERBEE :: SUPERCAINE :: SUPERCAINE DUO :: SUPERCAINE DUO (with DUSTY LEE STEPHENSEN) :: SUPERDOSE GANGWAY :: THE SUPERGROUPATOOS :: SUPERGRÜÜP :: SUPERPHATASS :: SUPERSONIC TUMBLEWEED :: SURES :: SURF! TERROR! PANIC! :: SURFER ROSA :: SURVIVING SHARKS :: SUZI STAPLETON :: SWAMP KITTEH :: SWAYBACK :: SWEEPER :: THE SWEET BLUES :: THE SWEET DECLINE :: SWEET GOLD :: SWIMMING :: SWIMSUIT :: THE SWISS :: SWORD IN STONE :: SWORDS :: SXWZD :: SYCAMORE :: SYDONIA :: THE SYSTEMADDICTS :: SYSTEM OF A DOWN :: TABLOIDS :: TABULA RASA :: TALL TALL TREES :: TALVIN SINGH :: TAME IMPALA :: TANTALUM :: THE TANUKI SUIT :: TANYA FROM HR :: TAPE/OFF :: TAPLEYS HILL :: TASH SULTANA :: TAUGHT BY ANIMALS :: TEA :: TEDDY MARS :: TEDDY MARS (SOLO) :: THE TEDDY ROYALS :: TEENAGE CRIME :: TEENAGE JOANS :: TEENAGERSINTOKYO :: TELEPROMPTER :: TEMPER TRAP :: TEMPORAL LOBE :: THE TEMPS :: TERRA AXIS :: TERRA FIRMA :: TGBRANDENBURG TRIO :: THANES :: THEE OH SEES :: THELMA PLUM :: THEM PLASMS :: THEM SWOOPS :: THESE WILD ANIMALS :: THE THIEVES :: THIS CITY SUNRISE :: THIS WAY NORTH :: THOSE MAGNIFICENT SCREAMING BASTARDS :: THOM LION :: THOM LION & THE TAMERS :: THOMA & THE HUMBUGS :: THOMAS CAPOGRECO :: THRASHBOARD :: THROWAWAY :: THUNDER SPEAKS :: THUNDERCLAW :: TIAN HANCOCK :: TIERSMAN :: TIGER CHOIR :: TIGER ET GHOST :: TIL THE BREAK :: TILES :: TILLARY :: TIM KOCH :: THE TIM MCMILLAN BAND :: TIM MOORE :: THE TIMBERS :: THE TIMBERS TRIO :: TIMBERWOLF :: TINY CONSPIRACY :: TINY SPIDERS :: THE TITS :: TKAY & BADCOP :: TKAY MAIDZA :: TODD FOGARTY :: TODD SIBBIN :: TODD SIBBIN & THE ACADIAN DRIFTWOOD :: TODD SIBBINS & THE OPPOSITE ENDS :: TOKYO CITY SEX SHOOTERS :: DJ TOM LOUD :: TOM CAPOGRECO & DUNCAN CAMPBELL :: TOM SMITH :: TOM WEST :: TOM WEST & TODD SIBBIN :: TOM THUM :: TOM UGLY :: TOMORROW IS :: TONES AND I :: TONY FONT SHOW :: TOOB SCOOTS :: TOOL :: TORK :: THE TORRENS :: TORTE E MORT :: THE TOSS :: TOTALLY UNICORN :: THE TOUCH :: TOUGH BOYS :: TOUGH UNCLE :: TOWNHOUSE :: TOWNS :: TOXIC SHOCK :: TRACER :: THE TRAFALGARS :: THE TRANSATLANTICS :: TRANSPORT :: TRASH CITY :: TRAVELLER & FORTUNE :: TREEHOUSE CASINO :: TREEHOUSES :: TREETOPS :: TRENT WORLEY :: TRICIA CATFORD :: TRICK SHOT :: THE TRIPPING LILIES :: TRIS BEAUMONT :: TRIXIE PLAIN :: TROLDHAUGEN :: TRUCE :: TRUCE & THE COLONEL :: TRUCKFIGHTERS :: TRUE HOLIDAY :: TRUTH CORRODED :: TTTDC :: TUCKSHOP :: THE TULLAMARINES :: TULSA :: TUMBLEWEED :: TUSCADERO :: TV THERAPY :: TWICE LICHEN :: TWIN DECOY :: TWINE :: TWITCH :: THE TWOKS :: TWO SUNS :: TWO WAY RADIO :: TXMX :: TY ALEXANDER :: TYCHO :: TYGER TYGER :: TYMPANO :: TYRESWANS :: TZU :: THE UGLY KINGS :: UK SPECIAL :: UKULELE DREAM GIRL :: UNCLE CHUNK :: UNCUT WHITE NOISE :: UNKLE :: UNKNOWN MORTAL ORCHESTRA :: UNPAID DEPT :: THE UNSET :: UNSPOKEN THINGS :: URBAN YOUTH :: URTEKK :: USER :: UTE ROOT :: THE VAINS :: VALENTIINE :: VALIANT JONES :: VALKYRIES :: THE VAMPIRE PROJECT :: VAN CLEEF :: VAN SHE :: VANE OF BARBS :: VANILLA ICE :: THE VANITY CURE :: VANITY ERA :: VARLIIBA :: THE VASCO ERA :: VELVET CHASE :: VELVET SNOW :: VELVET VOID :: VENICE QUEENS :: THE VENICE WHALERS :: VENTILATION EPISODE :: VENTOLIN :: VENTOLYN :: VERONA LIGHTS :: VERZANSKI :: THE VILLENETTES :: THE VILLENETTES (DUO) :: THE VINES :: THE VIOLET CRAMS :: VIOLET HARLOT :: VIOLENT SOHO :: VIRTUE :: VNB :: THE VOLUME :: VOLUME = COLOUR :: VOWEL MOVEMENT :: VOXANGELICA :: WAGONS :: WALKING WITH THIEVES :: WANDERERS :: WALTER MARSH :: THE WAR ON DRUGS :: WAR ROOM :: WARPAINT :: THE WARRING SIGHS :: THE WARSAW FLOWERS :: THE WARSAW PACT :: WASHINGTON :: THE WATERSLIDES :: WAYNE'S LUMBER :: WE ALL WANT TO :: WE AS ART, WE AS ARTISTS :: WE GROW UP :: WEED CAPITAL :: WEEKEND RAGE :: THE WEEVILS :: WEST THEBARTON :: WHAT SO NOT :: WHERE WERE YOU AT LUNCH :: THE WHISKEY GO GO'S :: THE WHISPERERS :: WHITE LUNG :: WHITE RHINO :: THE WHITE STRIPES :: WHITE SUMMER :: WILD OATS :: WILD ROCKET :: THE WILD THINGS :: WILEY RED FOX :: WILLIAM LEE :: THE WILLIAM STREET STRIKERS :: WILLIE MCRAE BAND :: WILLIS DRUMMOND :: WINDOW SHOPPING :: WING DEFENCE :: WINGFIELD :: THE WINTER GYPSY :: THE WINTER GYPSY TRIO :: WINTER MOON :: WINTER'S LAMENT :: WINTERCOATS :: WINTERMILD :: WIREHEADS :: THE WITCH :: WITCH HATS :: WITCH HUNT :: WITCH SPIT :: WOE :: WOLF & CHAIN :: WOLF & CUB :: WOLF ALICE :: WOLFMOTHER :: WOMEN MOVING FURNITURE :: WONDERWALLS JAM BAND REVIVAL BAND :: THE WOOHOO REVUE :: THE WOOLCOCKS :: WORLD WILD :: WREN & THE RESTLESS FEW :: WREN BELLETTE TRIO :: WYLDE THROE :: THE X O EXES :: XANGO :: XL VISION :: THE XX:: YANKEE MACHINE :: THE YARBLES :: YEASAYER :: THE YELLOW WALLPAPER :: YO :: YOSSARIAN :: YOUNG AND RESTLESS :: YOUNG HEARTS FAIL :: YOUNG LIONS :: YOUNG OFFENDERS :: YOUNG RIVER & THE VULTURES OF VIRTUE :: YOUR LOYAL HEARTLESS :: YOUR MOTIVE FOR :: YOUTH & WONDER :: YUSUKE AKAI :: YVES KLEIN BLUE :: ZAC EICHNER :: ZEAL :: ZEEQUIL :: ZEN PANDA :: ZETA :: ZOE BEHAN :: ZOE SALT ::

:: Tuesday, October 14, 2008

COLONEL KERNEL + ZETA + THE BATTERY KIDS
LIVE @ JIVE / Friday October 10th 2008

It explains everything. Well actually it doesn't. I mean what the FUCK am I on about this week? First it was Schrödinger's cat and now THIS shit!? It's called "Neoteny". It's not the sum total of Keanu Reeve's acting ability (or lack thereof) in all three of The Matrix movies. It's not something that you'd be fluent in if the only published journals you ever read up on are ones that feature a "style police". No it's a scientific term, look it up bitches it'll explain everything! Or better yet I'll simply explain it FOR you (and rather badly at that) and then YOU can sneak it into your next dinner party conversation and pretend YOU'RE all educated 'n shit. "Neoteny: also called juvenilization, is the retention, by adults in a species, of traits previously seen only in juveniles". It's how we evolved from the chimpanzee. It's our fascination with fire. It's our creative drive. It's how we can STILL be lactose tolerant well into our adulthood. It's everything we love about rock & roll. When the (blue) chips are down and it's fight or flight time, "Neoteny" is what gets us in and out of trouble. It is both the cure and disease that created our humanity. It's WWI followed by the "Roaring 20's", it's WWII followed by the "Swinging 60's", it's WWIII and the here and now, it's our genes spawning a memetic cascade that'll lead to all those freaky little space aliens with the giant bulbous heads that we all know is secretly US in a few thousands years. We invented the "teenager". We invented binge eating, drinking, capitalism and the nanny state. Now thanks to Jerry Seinfeld and Mick Jagger we can live like wide-eyed imbeciles our entire lives!



When our elected "adults" are fucking things up, when the apocalypse is nigh on our doorstep, when our nightly news simply adds another log to that fire. What better way to over react than to revert to our childhood!? Head in the sand, crawl back into our shells, duck and cover and wait for the bombs to drop. Terrorism, Climate Change, Famine, Drought, The Obesity Epidemic, Economic Collapse and Sarah (fucking) Palin!? We could've sworn there was only meant to be four of them; but now we've got a stampede. Let's watch it all burn. Let's toast those marshmellows. Let's party like there's no tomorrow. And where else would you want to be than right here at Jive to celebrate it? Like a giant block of blue lego with its shiny primary colours and it's cartoon stars: this is our "Romper Room" for adults, this is where we can hide!



THE BATTERY KIDS (****) myspace ::
Which from the looks of it, is a moment that this opening band has been waiting their entire lives to end for. The Battery Kids. Yup, if ever you wanted a pint sized Adelaide act to be the pure synthesis of Muse, Silverchair and Panic! At The Disco as performed by an anorexic, a manic depressive, an epilectic and a clockwork psychotic wailing and shrieking inches from your face (aka: Shannon Juvan on leads, Bowl Lipson on keys, Tom Krieg on bass and Shannon Simpson on drums respectively) then it would definitely be this one. They ARE the end of the world. They even wrote a song about it, it's called "Waiting For The End Of The World" and if ever I got stuck in an elevator with all four of them playing it, I might just want to end it all too. It's Shannon Juvan on leads wailing in an effeminate voice halfway between a lisp and a growl (or rather like Daniel John's entire music career as acted out by a stick of asparagus). It's Bowl Lipson on keys stabbing out that same note punctuated in time with Shannon Simpson, hacking and slashing on drums rather like a Hitchcockian ode to a shower knifing. It's Tom Krieg on bass continuously chasing his own tail. It's a jarring mix, made no less apparent when all four of them choose to break the tension by breaking into nonsensical acapella and even weirder when they bust a follow up number fuck full of shitcrazy tango rhythms. Still, in a time and place like this, their music is only all the MORE insanely relevant. The Battery Kids: your time is now!












As such with all four of them up on stage, wailing and weeping like infants tonight and with all of us packed into a venue that's feeling increasingly claustrophobic and decreasingly oxygenated by the minute: I'm reminded less of a pissy little band playing a pissy little opening set on a Friday night to next to no-one and more of Muse's "Stockholm Syndrome" with an entire TV audience breaking into song as a kitchen sink of existential shit gets blown to fuck around them (and while we're on the subject very much relating to it's namesake in the living of it as well.. yeeeouch!). The Battery Kids. They're a difficult customer but they DO grow on you, and tonight with all that's been going on in the world, I'm very much digging this shit. For when that "ship" finally sinks below those waves: who else but THESE guys would you ever want to have around!?



Our next band tonight is briefly interrupted by THIS guy: who for want of a better name I'll simply call "doucebag MC". They're a rarity at any live gig and for good reason: for nothing quite spoils the mood than some dingbat, wingnut or arseclown attempting to whip up a crowd with a "hey! hey! can we get a cheer for The Battery Kids!?", followed by the even lamer "no really with FEELING this time!?", when we'd much rather stare into our beers and look utterly ambivalent to be here. I mean how ELSE are we meant to maintain a slacker sense of cool!? Still, it could be worse: we could've been treated to a repeat performance from THIS douchebag MC from MTV's Kickstart instead (and yes, we're still having nightmares about that shit!).



ZETA (****1/2) myspace ::
Speaking of nightmares involving MTV Kickstart: the last time I saw this band was when I found THIS poor bastard stuck outside of Rocket Bar (moments after they played that night) arguing in vain with the doorbitch in effort to be let back in, only to be told the venue was at "capacity" (only to be dragged away by security moments later when he attempt to make a "run for it"). This is Sascha, lead singer of Zeta. Sascha rides a skateboard. Sascha has aggressively flared sinuses. Sascha bleeds all over his guitar. Sascha won't live past the age of 27 and will likely become one of those sadsack tragic "antiheroes" that pathetic teenage girls will swoon over for all the wrong reasons (disturbingly quite a few already do!). Sascha is also a political script writer: we can't say for sure which politician he writes for (or for which party) but it may possibly explain a LOT of the insane gibberish he spewed forth for this interview with Fasterlouder. To quote: "We’re basically keen to just get heaps famous and sleep with Hollywood starlets, like Mischa Barton. She apparently wanted to do that guy from Wolfmother so I reckon I could have a shot.". Yup, that's Sascha. He's equal measure masochist and bullshit artist. He's a whiny little bitch with a girl's name. He's everything that's wrong with Zeta and everything that makes this band all the more hilarious to write about this week. What an idiot. What a legend!





Zeta. They're also more than the sum of their parts. Not just for Sascha and his glaring immaturity but for many more reasons; even if they're down one tonight thanks to the glaring absence of their regular drummer Tom. Some claim it's the flu, herpies, Creutzfeldt-Jakob or lyme disease but we all know that's simply a cover story. What he's really doing is spending a "quiet one" up in his hillside retreat honing his sniple rifle skills. Laugh you may but one day we will thank him for his tireless service to the continuing survival of humanity (and likely that day will be "soon"). Replacing him instead is Luke from The Waterslides: who, although not nearly as passive aggressive as Tom usually behind the kit HAS got his signature look "between quiet desperation and suicidal boredom" pretty much nailed. Besides this (very minor) difference, Zeta tonight are pretty much the exact same band you loath (and secretly love) that sounds rather like a snuff film involving Brian Molko, Billy Corgan and Paul McCartney pissing in a circle whilst Paul Dempsey from Something For Kate gets strangled with piano wire; except for a few awkward moments where Anthony complains about his foldback being "much too loud" only to realise it's coming from his shirt. Oh and as much as I would love to make fun of Clemi on bass too, I won't because insanely cute chicks on bass guitar are the most awesome ever (and let's face it despite it being THE indie cliche #1, there's never nearly enough of them to go around!).












Yup that's Zeta. They're a mastercraft in songwriting. They're firing it up tonight like there's no tomorrow. They're the bawling infant in us all crying for mother nature to wipe the slate clean. They're also one of the best damn EP releases of the year! so much so that the Independent Weekly proudly proclaimed it as being: "nothing more than a maddeningly poor, pointless and self-indulgent excuse for an album.". Oh yes! they're a freaking gift to gonzo photojournalism! Take Sascha's guitar for instance. That same guitar I zoom into in this video with dementing glee. That same guitar STILL covered in flecks of blood. It used to belong to his fellow band member Anthony but after Sascha kept bleeding all over it Anthony sold it to him! That's how ridiculously awesome this band is! When everything's gone to shit, they're showing us exactly how we feel! (and providing me with endless material to mock them with). FUCK YEAH!



Such is the mad buzz that this band is beginning to build in the local scene that moments after Sascha pulls a "stigmata" on his guitar in the last song, turns white and collapses on stage (only for the rest of the band to play on like it was nothing out of the ordinary); a small procession of fangirls (who would otherwise frown upon such an act of sheer idiocy), appear out front to give him his last rites and burial with a funeral waltz all of their own.. hmmm creepy!




Only for them to swarm upon me in overwhelming numbers and deliver me as "human sacrifice" in case that scruffy little shitweasel should ever "rise again", discover a newfound fondness for human blood, a shaved head, muu-muu's and shittyarse 12 minute guitar solos (or the less we speak of Billy Corgan's career post "Mellon Collie And The Infinite Sadness".. the better!).



Only for them to be sent scurrying back into the shadows from whence they came by this douchebag again (in probably his ONLY welcome appearance of the night.. duuude I owe you one!), in effort to whip the crowd up into a lamearse frenzy for the final headlining band..



COLONEL KERNEL (*****) myspace ::
Let's face it, we all know we're going to hell in a handbasket (especially me for writing this shit every week). We're past the tipping point. We're over the event horizon. We're spiralling into the sun. It's all over. We're done. The human race is finished. Bring in the monkeys, the chimps, the crumbling Statue Of Liberty and Charlton Heston on the ground banging his fists and shrieking "YOOOU MANIACS!! YOU BLEW IT UP!!". It was fun while it lasted, Matt Bellamy was right all along! Still, it's not ALL bad news. Thanks to the thousand and one moodswings of our support acts: we've gone through all the denial, anger, bargaining and depression and now comes the fun part: acceptance. Everything's fucked, LET'S PARTY! And this is JUST the band to bring that party to us tonight. Colonel Kernel. They're shit hot. You've read it here. You could probably stop here. Then again it wouldn't be a review on Spoz's Rant if we DID. Colonel Kernel. They're seven members and one short of an octopus ensemble thrashing out an insane mariachi madjam that sounds like a cross between the slow bossa nova grooves of Faith No More's "King For A Day / Fool For a Lifetime", the retarding horn section hysteria of The Cat Empire, the drilling jazz funk of Red Snapper and the ecclectic mindfuck of TV On The Radio (and not just because Frank Morris Jnr on the saxaphone has a fuckoff afro that'd put Kype Malone's to shame). In a world rapidly going pear shaped, they're the only "mature response". They're also one of the most fuckoff awesome reasons to totally lose your shit out on a dancefloor..









The majority of their set is simply a continuous instrumental spacejam shredded out under low lights, interspersed by the occassional noodling guitar slowpoint, sparse on the vocal, even sparser on actual discernable lyrical content but never short of the heat and the energy. It also helps that unlike next to every OTHER three to four piece that crawls out of a Centrelink office and onto a live stage in this city; they also dress the part. Sure it's their CD launch tonight (so you'd expect them to go to a little extra effort), but considering how at ease they are blasting our innards in this mad getup tonight I'd almost expect to find them dressed JUST like this whilst waiting in line at the ATM, in the supermarket, in the park, or pretty much in that same dole queue with the rest of those yammering drug addicts, alcoholics and university dropouts that make up this Adelaide music scene. Colonel Kernel. Oh yes! This band means business!








And if ever we needed proof of their potency tonight, it would be in the crowd that greeted them with open arms and howled for more. From the first note they swarmed to fill every available choking point. A shifting sea of shuffling feet and swaying arms. A veritable shit magnet of fangirls in a feeding frenzy and ground zero to that unique freak species of (impossibly flexible) dredlocked hippy chick that sways in and out of the rhythms like flowing water, in alternating tones of brown and granola that you'd damn near sell your high octane carnivorous diet down the river for JUST to be a part of.. ooooh yeaaaah! They were out there! They were out there in droves. I wasn't photographing them for fear I would frighten them all away but in between being inadvertently mauled to death by one of them (hi Koral!) and weaving in and out of the arms and legs in between I did manage to record THIS video instead. Yup, to be in the thick of here tonight, here at Jive, here at the end of the world.. duuuuude I could've died happy! :)



And then just as predicted it happened. The apocalypse. The end of days. The rapture. They stormed in through those red gates: the living dead, the first of many "signs" of what is yet to come (or quite possibly just a mad stampede of obssessed Smashing Pumpkins fans come to kill me, offended by all those Billy Corgan jokes I made earlier) and there's nary a shotgun, flamethrower, chainsaw, cricket bat or lawnmower in sight to defeat them. Thankfully they weren't here for to feast on my brain (as let's face it I lost mine years ago) no they were simply here for Colonel Kernel's encore; here to bask in the last light that still shone bright in this ever darkening age, here to party hard for hours on end as the band kept on playing well into the night.. aaaah it was a thing of beauty to behold! (even as the band feared for their lives on stage) until eventually the army and the airforce were called in to carpet bomb us all to oblivion.



Thus we dedicate this untimely (and utterly fictional) demise to yet another live gig in the Adelaide music scene to Frank Morris Jnr: saxophanist for Colonel Kernel, occassional alcoholic at The Grace Emily, living legend. He's not actually dead, I'm sure he simply made his "escape" moments before those bombs dropped, I'm sure he's out there still for that one fateful day in the not too distant future when he'll be called upon for the George Romero sequel (or quite possibly THIS Friday night at The Crown & Sceptre) but if not? here's to you ya shitcrazy loon! You were a freak folicle abomination! you were a force of nature! and the world sure as fuck could've used a lot more of you. Fuck, I SO wish I could grow a fuckoff afro just like him.. shit don't we all?



2:16AM - In following I originally planned a nonsensical trip to The Ed Castle. I mean shit, just because it's the end of life as we know it doesn't mean we can't still have some fun with it (it IS Adelaide afterall!). Mysteriously however The Ed was already closed down for the night. Even more mysteriously all their windows and doors had since been boarded up too. I took one look at the charred corpses of the recently (un)deceased and dismembered who dared breach their walls, I ducked the buckshot fired from several sets of beady eyes peering out from the darkness within and I made my way to the east end ghetto. For no trip bordering on the increasingly hallucinogenic is ever complete of late without some misguided multiple "homicide" at this end of town. Although from the look of Producers Bar tonight it appears no amount of garbage bags, mangrove swamps, deep sea trenches, barrels of acid, pig farms or Micky D "happy meals" is EVER going to clean up this emo mess anytime too soon. Still, I find it never hurts to try..



3:32AM - Much unspeakable carnage later and I find myself here at The Crown & Anchor: the solution (and cause) for most of the world's problems. I'm also beginning to suspect all this "apocalypse" nonsense tonight was simply a false alarm (or quite possibly the "end product" of a little too much chilli added to my mi-goreng); but hey when you're upto your armpits in duct tape and fridge magnets, fending off gun toting mutants and mohawked militia firing up chainsaws (and even if you're not and simply tripping balls) where ELSE would you go!?



3:37AM - Speaking of malformed freaks, it's not long before I'm set upon by one of Tyger Tyger's many hired goons; although for a change of pace it's actually not Nick, but bass player Tim instead. Which lends to proof to the insane theory (that I've only just thought up now) that Nick from Tyger Tyger, Frank from Colonel Kernel AND Frawley from Marla Singer are in actual fact the SAME person. And now that one of them has since "died" in a freak zombie accident at Jive, all three have now since ceased to exist (and I have of course deleted ALL other photographic evidence I actually took of Nick here tonight as proof that I'm right!)



3:51AM - I attempt to further explain this insane theory to Tim: how there's been a whole "afro conspiracy" stretching right back to the Nixon administration, how Andrew Stockdale is really the Antichrist, how it's all leading to this point, only for him to point out the many glaring holes in my argument, only for me to panic, stuff his head inside this impenetrable force field of pint glasses: "HA! take that science!", before making my mad escape out those exit doors..



4:23AM - Fearing the worst has finally come, I seek sanctuary here at Supermild. I've got my alcohol, I've got my food, I've got my stockpile of weapons. Flesh eating zombies, killer tornados, climate change, terrorism and Guy Sebastian be damned! I'm gonna ride out this storm! and when that dust clears, this whole world is going to be mine, ALL MINE!! WAAAHAHAhaHA!!



4:50AM - Only to realise the one hideously fatal flaw in my genius plan. I have to repopulate the Earth with THIS freak "OH DEAR GAWD WHAT THE HELL HAVE WE DONE!!?" Although wait.. we're living in desperate times, surely we shouldn't discount this shit outright! I mean look at him! it could work right!? we're in a field of daisies, it's a warm spring day, he's twirling around, his floral dress flapping in the breeze, our eyes meet as if from a distance, we run up to meet each other, his thin weedy moustache twinkling in the sunlight.. aaaand excuse me while I just go throw up. Whoaaaa.. what were we talking about? oh that's right, I'm fucking insane!



5:57AM - I could possibly explain what followed when I came to that horrible realisation, followed by a sizeable memory blank of what I had to do to get out of there, followed by me screaming hysterically as I run out of Supermild and into the pale moon light. I could also possibly explain where the hell I ended up an hour later STILL drinking well into the bullet riddled remains of the night; but some things (especially THESE photos) are best left unsaid..



Duuuude I so should've gone home hours ago.. what the fuck have we just unleashed!? Is this the new world order? is this the new world disorder? and how (and where) the fuck do we keep FINDING all these freaks (or worse still, how do they keep finding ME). If only I knew!?



Yup, when the world's going totally tits up, down the drain and blowing fire out of it's arse: who needs laws? who needs rules? who needs all of this insane responsibility? who needs generations upon generations of degenerate thinking to lead us all astray? I say fuck it all! I say let it all burn! I say let's toast those marshmallows! Let's party like there's no tomorrow! Let's start it all over again! We're already building our own army: sure we're nothing but a mad cult of the immature, the misguided and the misfit few, but we sure as fuck couldn't do any worse out there! It's evolution. It's the way of the future. It's the end of the world! Who's with me? :)

Previously on Spoz's Rant: Fire! Santa Rosa Fire! + Kytes Of Omar

:: Spoz 2:34 PM |
...

Bookmark and Share