:: SPOZ's RANT ::

 
The Adelaide scene: to many of you it may be little more than a touring speed bump between Melbourne and Perth but to us it's a way of life. Feast within, on all its dysfunctional splendour, as we bring you the highly satirical, laughingly fictional and intellectually imbecile tales from our rock & roll wasteland...

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[::..latest blogs..::]
:: DIETER HORVAT; HEAD IN
THE OVEN, LIZARD PEOPLE,
THE KAVS, JAYNE DOE and
APOLLO LANE; 10 Years Of
Ancient World (Festival) w/
THE BAIT FRIDGE, KLAPTSTAKZ,
BITCHSPAWN and BABYTEETH

:: New Found Sound (Festival)
w/ SONS OF ZÖKU, COLDWAVE,
LOS PALMS, ALANA JAGT, NIGHT
RITES x THUNDER SPEAKS,
NAOMI KEYTE, RYAN MARTIN
JOHN and STREET LEGAL;
THE SONGS OF TOM SMITH
and JOHNNY SEAGULL & THE
HOT CHIPS; BUDDHADATTA
:: MAISIE, BUDDY J FRANCIS
and SAM PAGE; RICKY
ALBECK & THE BELAIR
LINE BAND (Single Launch)
w/ THE CONDOS and
MORTAL AMBITION
:: TUCKSHOP and
BRAVE MISTAKES; NIGHT
RITES and THE GENEVIEVES;
MODERN RELICS
(Single Launch) w/ THE MAX
HEADROOM; CARLA LIPPIS &
MONDO PSYCHO and BRIXX
:: SHODASHI, HEPÉ MATEH
and LIVE SLUG REACTION
:: HALL OF FAME ::
:: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES** :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ARTAX MISSION :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND* :: BOOSTER :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CIRCLE CLAN :: COERCE :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: CONCHILLIA :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: DOUBLE HANDED* :: THE DUNES :: EGYPT :: ENCARTA / COLONEL KERNEL** :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA FIRE!*** :: FRIENDS :: GLASS SKIES :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT* :: THE HONEY PIES** :: HORROR MY FRIEND* :: ISLE OF VISION :: JUNGLE CITY :: KAMIKAZE :: THE KEEPSAKES* :: THE KILLGIRLS*** :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: LADY STRANGELOVE** :: LEADER CHEETAH* :: LIKE LEAVES** :: LUMONICS* :: LYLA :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS*** :: MERE THEORY :: MORALS OF A MINOR* :: THE MOTIVE :: MR WEDNESDAY** :: NO THROUGH ROAD*** :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: REALIST FEW :: RIDE INTO THE SUN** :: THE SEA THIEVES* :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS* :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY*** :: SKELETONS :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE* :: SONS OF ZOKU :: SPARKSPITTER* :: SQUEAKER :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: STEERING BY STARS* :: SWIMMING :: TEA :: THE TIMBERS :: TONY FONT SHOW** :: TRACER :: THE TRANSATLANTICS** :: TWO SUNS :: TYGER TYGER* :: THE VILLENETTES* :: WEST THEBARTON BROTHEL PARTY :: WOLF & CUB** :: ZETA ::
[::..rant awards..::]
:: 2008 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2009 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2010 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2011 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
:: RECOMMENDED ::
[::..global..::]
:: NME
:: SPIN
[::..local..::]
[::..blogosphere..::]
[::..miscellaneous..::]
:: XKCD
:: SITE FEATURES ::
[::..video blogs..::]
[::..festival blogs..::]
:: Fringe Festival 2012
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2013
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2015
- 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 |
5
| 6 | 7 | 8
:: Fringe Festival 2017
- 1 |
2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
[::..b&w episodes..::]
:: A Winter Wonderland
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
:: In Limbo - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7
:: B&W July 2012 - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8
:: society intermission
- 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

| 11
| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15
| 16
| 17 | 18 | 19 | 20
| 21 | 22 | 23 | 24
[::..special features..::]
:: ARTIST INDEX ::
:: !!! :: THE 1NE :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES (DUET) :: 200 MOTELS :: 4 KINGS LOUD :: 4 VOICE :: 67 SPECIAL :: THE 7.4.5. :: 78 SAAB :: A.B. ORIGINAL :: A.D.K.O.B. :: A FILM FOR THE FUTURE :: A GAZILLION ANGRY MEXICANS :: A RED DAWN :: A YOUNG MAN DRESSED AS A GORILLA DRESSED AS AN OLD MAN SITS ROCKING IN A ROCKING CHAIR FOR FIFTY-SIX MINUTES AND THEN LEAVES :: AAARRR! ALL ABOARD FOR PIRATEY VARIETY :: AARON THOMAS :: AARON THOMAS & THE HUMAN PATTERNS :: AARON THOMAS TRIO :: ABBEY HOWLETT :: ABBEY HOWLETT & THE GOLDEN REALM :: ABLACKWELL :: ABOLISHED :: ABRASKA :: ACID MOUNTAIN :: ACID WOLF :: ACROSS THE ATLAS :: ADALITA :: ADAM GEOFFREY COLE :: THE ADAM HIGGS FIELD SUPERCOLLIDER :: ADAM PAGE :: ADELAIDE'S PIPE GUY :: ADNAAN BARAKY :: ADRIAN BELEW :: ADRIAN DEUTSCH :: AFFAIRS OF MEN :: AFI :: AFTER THE FALL :: AGAPANTHER :: AIDAN J JONES :: AIRBOURNE :: ALANA JAGT :: ALANA JAGT & THE MONOTREMES :: ALARM BIRDS & THE SEA THIEVES :: ALBANY AVENUE :: ALDOUS HARDING :: ALEKSIAH :: ALEX K :: ALEX K & THE SPUTNIK SWEETHEARTS :: ALEXANDER BLACK :: ALIAS & THE JAMS :: ALISON COPPE :: ALISON COPPE & THE JANES :: ALITHIA :: ALL FLIGHT CREW ARE DEAD :: ALL MADE OF RUBIES :: ALL NIGHT GIRLS :: ALMA KALORAMA :: ALNITAK KID :: ALPEN :: ALPHA BETA FOX :: ALPHA STREET :: ALPHABETTE :: ALPINE :: ALREADY GONE :: ALRIGHT PSYCHO :: ALT. :: ALUKA :: AMBUSH MARKETING :: THE AMCATS :: AMENDS :: AMUNDSENS FLAG :: AMY SHARK :: ANCIENT DESIGN :: ANDERSON .PAAK & THE FREE NATIONALS :: ANDREW HIGGS & THE SAND CASTLE HARUM :: ANDREW MCCUBBIN feat. MELINDA KAY :: ANDREW P. STREET :: ANDY BULL :: ANDY ROBERTS :: ANGEL & THE BADMAN :: ANGEL EYES :: ANGEL OLSEN :: ANGELIK :: ANGELS OF GUNG-HO :: ANGIE HART :: ANIMAL SHADOWS :: ANIMAL TRAPS :: ANNIE BASS :: ANNIE OK :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ANNY DUFF :: ANTHONY ANT :: ANTHONY WIGNALL :: ANTI PSYCH :: ANTONY OF THE FUTURE :: ANTY! :: ANYA ANASTASIA :: ANYA ANASTASIA & THE BIRD WIZDOM CABARET :: ANYA MCNICOL-WINDRAM :: THE APE :: APHELION :: APPARITION :: APOLLO LANE :: APPOMATTOX RUN :: THE AQUARIAN MYSTERIES :: ARAKEYE :: THE ARCADE FIRE :: ARCHERS :: ARCHIE :: ARCHITECTURE IN HELSINKI :: ARE YOU DRINKING COMFORTABLY? :: ARGUS & THE LIAR :: ARIEL PINK'S HAUNTED GRAFFITI :: ARIES :: ARIES FLOW :: ARIS SPEED :: ARLO COOK :: ARMITAGE SHANKS :: ARMOUR FOU :: ARRAY :: ART OF ESCAPE :: THE ART OF FLYING KITES :: ARTAX MISSION :: AS THE PENNY DROPS :: THE ASTEROID BELT :: ASTRO ELEVATOR :: THE ATLANTIC STREET BAND :: ATLASIS & AMICA :: ATTILA MY HONEY :: ATOMIC SISTER :: ATTONBITUS :: ATTONBITUS (SOLO) :: AUBERON DANCE ACADEMY :: AUDIUM :: THE AUDREYS :: AUGUSTE :: AURA FORM :: AURORA :: THE AUTHENTIC REPLICAS :: AUXILLA :: AVANT GARDENERS :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: AWKWARD LOVE TRIANGLE :: AXE & THE IVORY :: BABES ARE WOLVES :: BABY CANDY :: BABY MO :: BABYLON BURNING :: BABYTEETH :: BACHELOR OF ARTS :: BACHELORETTE :: THE BACKYARDERS :: BACKSEAT ROMEOS :: BAD//DREEMS :: BAD LUCK CABARET :: BADBADNOTGOOD :: BADLAND CARAVAN :: THE BAIT FRIDGE :: BAKER BOY :: THE BAKER SUITE :: THE BAKER'S DIGEST :: BAKEWELL STREET :: BALL PARK MUSIC :: BANG! BANG! AIDS! :: BANJO JACKSON :: BANJO WEATHERALD :: BANOFFEE :: BARCODE :: THE BARON :: BARON VON DOODIE :: THE BARONS OF TANG :: BART'S NIGHTMARE :: BASEBALL :: THE BASKERVILLES :: A BASKET OF MAMMOTHS :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: BASTY & FRIENDS :: BASTY H :: BAT FOR LASHES :: BATHAWK :: BATPISS :: BATRIDER :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BATTLEHOUNDS :: BATTLE POPE :: BATTLES :: BEACH HOUSE :: BEACH LEECH :: BEANIE MY FRIEND :: BEAR THE MAMMOTH :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND :: THE BEARDS :: THE BEASTIE BOYS :: THE BEAUTIFUL MONUMENT :: BEC STEVENS :: BECCY ZAHO :: BED WETTER :: BEDHEAD :: THE BEDROOM PHILOSOPHER & HIS AWKWARDSTRA :: BEE PREFECT :: THE BEERBELLY BUSKERS :: BEFORE THE AFTERMATH :: THE BELAIR LIP BOMBS :: BELITTLE LEAGUE :: THE BELLE CURVE :: THE BELLRAYS :: BELOVED ELK :: BEN GEL & THE BONEYARD SAINTS :: BEN ELY'S RADIO 5 :: BEN REVI :: BEN REVI ALL-STAR REVIVAL BAND :: BEND :: BERMUDA BAY :: BETTY AIRS :: BIG BAD BARRY & THE DEAD SETS :: BIG DADDY'S DISCOTHEQUE :: BIG RICHARD INSECT :: BIG ROMANCE :: BIG SCARY :: BIG SKY THEORY :: BIG SLOE :: BIG TOWN :: BIG YAWN :: BIKE WRECK :: BILLIE EILISH :: BILLY BISHOP GOES TO WAR :: BILLY BOB'S BBQ JAM BAND :: BING GOES TO MONACO :: BINKY & THE BUNG MICS :: THE BIRD :: BIRD DETECTIVE :: BIRD WIZDOM :: BIRDS ARE SPIES :: BIRTHGLOW :: BIT BY BATS :: BITCH PREFECT :: BITCHSPAWN :: THE BITTER DARLINGS :: BITTER SWEET KICKS :: BJORK :: THE BLACK AND WHITE :: BLACK CHROME :: BLACK CORAL :: THE BLACK DOVES :: BLACK GOLD :: THE BLACK HEART DEATH CULT :: BLACK KNIGHT :: BLACK LIPS :: BLACK STONE FROM THE SUN :: BLACKCHORDS :: BLACKPENNY :: BLAKE SABAN 3 :: BLAST RHOMBUS :: THE BLEEDING FLARES :: BLEEDING KNEES CLUB :: THESE BLESSED BONES :: THE BLIND HERD :: BLISTERED PALMS :: BLOOMING :: BLOOD PLASTIC :: BLOOD SUCKING FREAKS :: BLOODHOUNDS ON MY TRAIL :: BLOODSTONE VILLAINS :: BLOW UP BETTY :: BLUE LUCY :: BLUE LUNACY :: BLUE SKY HOLIDAY :: THE BLUEBERRIES :: BLUEJUICE :: BLUSH :: BLUSH (SOLO) :: BLUSH RESPONSE :: BOB DOWNE :: BOB LOG III :: BODY HORROR :: BOHOEFFER :: THE BON SCOTTS :: BONG COFFIN :: BONOBO :: BOOBY TRAP :: A BOOGIE WIT DA HOODIE :: BOOMSKULLY :: BOOSTER :: THE BORDERLAND :: BORN LION :: BOS :: THE BOTANICALS :: THE BOTTLEROCKETS :: BOX ELDER :: THE BOX ROCKETS :: BOY YOUNG :: BRAVE MISTAKES :: BREE TRANTER :: BRENDAWG & THE DROID :: BRETT LITTLEFAIR :: BREWER :: THE BRIAN JONESTOWN MASSACRE :: BRIANNA MAHONEY :: BRIARS :: BRIDGET FAHEY :: BRIDGET FAHEY & THE BONE RATTLERS :: BRILLIG :: BRIT TRUEACK :: BRITISH INDIA :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS (DUO) :: BRIXX :: BROMHAM :: BRONZE CHARIOT :: BROKEN SOCIAL SCENE :: BROKERS :: THE BROTHERS GOON :: BROTHERSISTER :: THE BROUHAHA :: BRUNATEX :: BUCK IT :: BUDDHADATTA :: BUDDY J FRANCIS :: BUFFALO BOYFRIEND :: THE BUMBLEBEEZ :: THE BUOYS :: BURAKA SOM SISTEMA :: BURIED FEATHER :: BURJON :: BURLESQUE BEAUTIES :: BURN THE ASHES :: BURNING BRIDGES :: THE BURNING SEA :: BURNING TOWER :: BURNSIDE MUMS :: BURNT FISH :: BUSHIDO :: BUSSEYS :: BUSTER FIDEZ :: BUTTERFLY SPINE :: BYE BYE MOUNTAIN :: BYSEA :: THE BYZANTINES :: C.H.O.P. ::CABBAGE & KINGS :: CABIN CULTS :: CABLE TIES :: CAGEFLY :: CAL WILLIAMS JR :: CALIFORNIA COUSIN :: CALLERDENIGHT :: CALLING ALL CARS :: CAM GOODALL :: CAMEROM MCTERNAN :: CAMP COPE :: CAN MASTER SMASH & MOTUS COLLECTIVE :: CANDIDA :: CANIDAE :: CANIS VULPES :: CAPTAIN CLEANOFF :: CAPTAIN HELLFIRE & THE WRETCHED BRETHREN :: THE CAPTAINS OF INDUSTRY :: CAPTIVES :: CAR SEAT HEADREST :: CARL DOVER & 3 DEEP :: CARLA LIPPIS & THE MARTIAL HEARTS :: CARLA LIPPIS & MONDO PSYCHO :: CAROLINE REID :: THE CASIO BROTHERS :: CASKET CASE :: CASS McCOMBS :: CASSETTE KIDS :: CAT DOG BIRD :: CAT LUCKY :: CAT PARTY :: CAUSING HAMMOCK :: CELESTITE :: CENTAURZ :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CERES :: CESARE :: CHAMP :: CHANCERY LANE :: CHAPMAN STREET :: CHARLIE MONSOON :: CHASING GHOSTS :: CHASING LANA :: CHASING PHOENIX :: THE CHATS :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CHEESE WORLD :: CHELSEA LEE :: CHELSEA MANOR :: CHERRY GRIND :: THE CHEVRON WHORES :: CHÉRIE DE KLERK :: CHILD :: CHILDREN COLLIDE :: CHINA CRISIS :: CHINA ROSES :: CHINESE NEW YEAR :: CHRIS FINNEN :: CHRIST DISMEMBERED :: CHORAL GRIEF :: CHOOSING SIDES :: CHURCH MOMS :: CHVRCHES :: CIARAM GRANGER :: CIRCLE CLAN :: CIRCUS ARCADE :: THE CITRADELS :: CITRUS JAM :: THE CITY :: CITY CALM DOWN :: CITY FEET :: CITY RIOTS :: THE CLANGERS :: CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH :: THE CLASHING PUMPKINS :: CLAY J GLADSTONE :: CLIENT LIASON :: THE CLIQUE :: CLOUD CONTROL :: CLOUD NOTHINGS :: CLOVER :: THE CLOWNS OF DECADENCE :: CLUB LOCK :: CLUE TO KALO :: COBRA :: COCK :: C.O.F.F.I.N :: CODRA NEGRA :: COERCE :: COG :: THE COLD FIELD :: COLDWAVE :: COLLARBONES :: COLLIDE/ESCAPE :: COLLIDER :: COLONEL KERNEL :: COLORBLIND :: COLOURBLIND :: COLOURBLIND DUO :: COLOURISE :: COLTER :: COLUMBUS :: CONCHILLIA :: THE CONDOS :: THE CONFESSIONALS :: CONOR DEERY :: CONSOLE WARRIORS :: COOKIE BAKER :: COOKIE BAKER & HER SPECIAL SECRET SPELLS :: COOL JUMPER :: COOL JUMPER & TANTIVY FAIR :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: COPIOUS DRIBBLE :: CORPUS :: THE CORTEX SHIFT :: CORTEZ :: COSMIC FOSSIL :: COSMIC SHEPHERD :: COSMO BLACK :: COSMO THUNDERCAT :: COSMO THUNDERCAT (DUO) :: COUNTERFEIT TRAITOR :: COURTNEY BARNETT :: THE COURTNEY LOVES :: COVE STREET :: COY CARP :: CRACKWHORE :: THE CRAVES :: THE CRAYON FIELDS :: CREEPERS :: CROSSFIRE HURRICANE :: CRUSTY SUITCASE BAND :: THE CRYING GAME :: CRYSTAL IGNITE :: CUB SCOUTS :: CUB SPORT :: CULL - THE BAND :: CURIOUS PALMS :: CURSES :: CUT COPY :: CUT OFF YOUR HANDS :: THE DAINTY MORSELS :: THE DAIRY BROTHERS :: DAISY BUCHANAN :: DAIYE SPA :: DALLAS FRASCA :: DALLI :: DAMN ARMS :: DAMN TERRAN :: DAMNED MEN :: DAMO SUZUKI NETWORK :: DAN DEVLIN :: DAN GASKIN :: DANCE TIL YOU CAN'T SAY YEAH! :: DANDY BUZZKILLS :: THE DANGER DOLPHINS :: DANGER & PLASTIC :: DANGEROUS! :: DANIEL VARRICCHIO :: DANIELE VILELLA :: DANVERS :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DAPPLED CITIES :: THE DARDANELLES :: DARK DAZE :: THE DARK LIGHTS :: DARTS OF PLEASURE :: DAS UBBERDUNG :: DAVE PHILLIPS :: DAVID BLUMBERG :: DAVID BLUMBERG & THE MARABY BAND :: DAY RAVIES :: DAYDREAM :: THE DAYLIGHT BRAVES :: DAYSWORTH FIGHTING :: THE DEAD BELLS :: DEAD END FRIENDS :: DEAD FRENCHMEN :: DEAD JOE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: THE DEAD REGULARS :: DEAD ROO :: DEADLY ARE THE NAKED :: DEAFAULT :: DEAN FOREVER :: DEAR PLASTIC :: DEATH BY CARROT :: DECOS :: DED//WESZ :: THE DEE MAJOR MYSTERY BAND :: DEEP SEA ARCADE :: THE DEER JOHNS :: DEERHUNTER :: DEJA :: DEJA ENTENDU :: DELIA OBST :: THE DELTA RIGGS :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DENTAL JAMS & EZROH :: DESCRIBE ELIZA :: DESERT CROOKS :: DESTINEZIA :: A DEVIL AMONGST THE TAILORS :: DEVIL ELECTRIC :: THE DEVILROCK FOUR :: DEXTER JONES :: DIAMOND SINS :: DIAMOND SKIES :: DIANA SCALZI :: DICK DIVER :: DIE! DIE! DIE! :: DIESEL WITCH :: DIETER HORVAT :: DIETER HORVAT & THE $5 MYSTERY SHOTS :: DIIV :: DILATED :: DILETTANTES :: DIPLOMAT :: DIPSTONE :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: THE DIRTY MONKS :: DIRTY PAGANS :: DIRTY WOLVES :: THE DIVINE FLUXUS :: DIZZEE RASCAL :: DJ KELE OKEREKE :: DJ SHADOW :: DJ SPOZ :: DJANGO ROWE QUARTET :: DJANGO ROWE TRIO :: DMA'S :: DOC DISORDERS :: DOCTOR TREK IN SPACE :: DOE :: DOM TRIMBOLI & THE WIZARDS :: DON MORRISON :: DONNARUMMA :: DON'T BRING STACEY :: DOOM POP :: DORKZ :: DOUBLE DENIM :: DOUBLE DRAGON :: DOUBLE HANDED :: DOWN & OUT :: DOZERS :: DR SURE'S UNUSUAL PRACTICE :: DRAINING :: DRAINING (ACOUSTIC) :: DRASTIC PARK :: DRAWN FROM BEES :: DREAM WIFE :: THE DREAMBOATS :: DRESS CODE :: DREW & SEAN :: DRILLER JET ARMSTRONG :: THE DRONES :: DROPLET :: DRUID FLUIDS :: DRUID FLUIDS (DUO) :: DRUNK MUMS :: DUD PILLS :: DUKES OF WINDSOR :: DUMB EARTH :: DUNE RATS :: THE DUNES :: DUNGEN :: DUSTY LEE :: DUSTY LEE & THE ANGELS OF GUNG HO :: DUSTY LEE'S BLUES JAM BAND :: DUSTY LEE'S WASTED WANDERERS :: DUZZMERALDA :: DYSPORA :: DZ :: DZ DEATHRAYS :: EARL SWEATSHIRT :: EAST BRUNSWICK ALL GIRLS CHOIR :: EAST END VILLAINS :: ECCENTRICK - FANTASY EDITION :: ECDYSIS :: ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN :: ECHO & THE EMPRESS :: EDDY CURRENT SUPPRESSION RING :: THE EFFENDS :: EFFIE :: EGYPT :: THE EL CAMINOS :: EL COLOSSO :: EL FARINHO :: ELECTRIC EXILES :: ELECTRIC FIELDS :: ELECTRIC SEX PANTS :: ELECTRIC WIDOWS :: ELENA & AIDAN CIBICH :: ELEPHANT :: ELEPHANT HIVE :: THE ELEVENTH HOUR :: THE E.L.F. :: ELK :: ELLA ION :: ELLEN KIBBLE :: ELLI BELLE :: THE ELLIOTT JOHNSON BAND :: EL BOTTLE O' PARADISO :: EL-P :: ELSY WAMEYO :: ELVIS :: EMDEE :: EMERAULD :: EMERGENCY RULE :: EMILY DAVIS :: EMILY DAVIS TRIO :: EMILY WYATT :: EMMA HORWOOD :: EMMA JAYNE :: EMPERORS :: EMPIRE VAGABOND :: THE EMPTY SLEEPS :: THE EMPTY THREATS :: ENCARTA :: ENDLESS NAMELESS :: ENEMY OF :: ENERGY ANGEL :: ENNIS TOLA :: ENVY STREET :: ER@SER DESCRIPTION :: ERIN BUKU :: ERIN MO :: ES IST SUPER :: ETHAN HUBBARD :: ETHANOL BLEND :: ETHANOL BLEND (DUO) :: EVEN :: EVERYDAY APATHY :: EXOTIC POTION COOKIES :: EXPATRIATE :: THE EXPLODERS :: EXPLODING PLASTIC INEVITABLE :: THE EXPLOSIONING :: EYES MORE SKULL THAN EYES :: EZRA HOPE :: FACEMEAT :: FACEMEAT - A ROCK OPERA :: FAFI D'ALOUR & THE DELINQUENTS :: FAIR CALL :: FAITH NO MORE :: FAIR MAIDEN :: THE FAK :: FAKE LAKE :: FAKE TAN :: FASCINATOR :: THE FAT SACK :: FAT TAILED ANTICHINUS :: FATHER JOHN MISTY :: FAVOUR THE BRAVE :: FEAR AND LOATHING :: THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS :: FEBRUARY CLOUDS :: FEIST :: FEMME FATALES :: FERGUS O'REGAN :: FEZ FAANANA :: THE FIDDLE CHICKS :: FIGHTERPILOT :: FILTHY LUCRE :: THE FINISHING SCHOOL :: FINNEN & DAVIDSON :: THE FINNS :: FIRS :: FISHING WITH HENRY :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA, FIRE! :: FIST PUMP, FIST BUMP :: FISTFUL OF TROJANS :: FKA TWIGS :: FLAVELLA L'AMOUR :: THE FLEEING MINDS :: FLEUR GREEN :: FLEUR GREEN & THE KEEPERS :: THE FLOORS :: FLORENCE & THE MACHINE :: FLUME :: THE FLYING SQUAD DUO :: FLYYING COLOURS DUO :: THE FOLKO-OH-NOES :: FONT PLAYS FONT :: FOOL'S IDOL :: FORCES :: FOREIGN/NATIONAL :: FOREST OF GNOMES :: FORMER CHILD STARS :: FOX FAEHRMANN :: FOXX ON FIRE :: FRANKIE SUNWAGON :: FRANZ FERDINAND :: FRAUD MILLIONAIRES :: FREE DRINKS :: FREESTATE :: FRESH KILLS :: FRIDAY'S FOX :: FRIENDS :: FROM THE DEAD SEA :: FULL CONTACT SAFARI :: FULL TONE GENERATOR :: THE FUMES :: FUNK LATIN UNION :: FUNKOARS :: FUNKY C FUNKY DO :: FUTURE FARM :: FUTURE ISLANDS :: THE FYOOGS :: G FLIP :: GALAPAGOOSE :: GALAXY CAT :: GALLEON :: GALLERY ONE :: GANG OF YOUTHS :: GARDEN RUIN :: GAVIN DE ALMEIDA :: GAY PARIS :: THE GELS :: GEMINI DOWNS :: GEMMA THORNE :: GENERATION SWINE :: THE GENEVIEVES :: GEORDIE LITTLE :: GEORGE GLASS :: GEORGIA NIELSEN :: GERMEIN SISTERS :: GET SOME :: GG ALAN BINDIG :: GHOST THIEF :: GHOST WALK :: GHOUL :: GHYTI :: GHYTI (DUO) :: GHYTI & THE PHILANTHROPIC ORCHESTRA :: GINDIANA BONES AND THE SEVERAL KIDNEYS OF THE UNDERGROUND TRAIN STATION :: GINFOX VS HELLO NEWMAN :: GIRL :: GIRL TALK :: THE GIVEAWAYS :: GLASS :: GLASS DUNES :: GLASS SKIES :: GLASS TOWERS :: GLEN AVENTI :: GLENN OSMOND & THE FULLARTONES :: GLISK :: GLITORIS :: GLOWING :: GNARLS BARKLEY :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT (Lounge Set) :: GOLD BLOOM :: THE GOOD CHINA :: GOOD BOY :: GOODBYE, MOTHER LEOPARD :: GOONBOMB :: GOON WIZARRD :: GOTYE :: GRACE: THE SONGS OF JEFF BUCKLEY :: GRACE CUMMINGS :: GRACE GOODFELLOW :: GRAFTON PRIMARY :: GRAFTON STREET :: THE GRAND RAPIDS :: GRASSHOPPER & THE BUTTERFROGS :: THE GRATES :: GRAVEYARD TRAIN :: GREAT GABLE :: GREEN CIRCLES :: GREENLEAF :: THE GREETING METHOD :: GRENADIERS :: GREY DATURAS :: GRIMES :: GRIMEY :: GROOVE ARMADA :: GROUND COMPONENTS :: THE GROWL :: GUILLAUME SOLO ACOUSTIC :: GUINEAFOWL :: GUN IT :: GÜNTER & THE SAFEWORD :: GYRO :: HÄGÖL :: HAIM :: HAL BIRD :: HALCYON DRIVE :: HALFWAY TO FORTH :: HANA & JESSIE-LEE'S BAD HABITS :: HANNAH FAIRLAMB :: HANNAH YATES :: THE HAPPY ENDINGS :: HAPPY SOMETIMES :: HAR MAR SUPERSTAR :: THE HARD ACHES :: HARD RUBBISH :: HARMLESS HUNTER :: HARMONY :: HARRY FREEMAN :: HARTS :: HARTWAY :: HARVEY RUSSELL :: HAWKS OF ALBA :: HAYSTACKS CALHOON :: HAZY J & THE WASTED DAZE :: HEAD IN THE OVEN :: HEAPS GOOD FRIENDS :: HEARTLINE :: HEATH WEBER :: THE HEGGARTIES :: HEINOUS CRIMES :: HEKYL :: HELLO ENEMY :: HELLO, LOVER :: HELLO NEWMAN :: HELLS HOIST :: HELMET :: HENRY WILSON :: HEPÉ MATEH :: HESTON DROP :: HEY FEVER :: HEY HARRIETT :: HEY LADY! :: HI, I'M RECLUSIVE AUTHOR THOMAS PYNCHON :: HIDDEN INTENT :: THE HIGH BEAMERS :: HIGH STAKES :: HIGH TENSION :: HIGH VIOLET :: HIGHTIME :: HILLS & TRAINS :: HIT THE JACKPOT :: HOCKEY DAD :: HOFMANN & THE COSMONAUTS :: THE HOLD STEADY :: THE HOLIDAYS :: HOLLY HASTINGS :: HOLOGRAPHIC CHARIZARD :: HOLOGRAPHIC COLTS :: HOLY FORREST :: HOLY FUCK :: HOLY HOLY :: THE HOLY SEA :: HOLY SERPENT :: HOME COURT :: HOME FOR THE DEF :: HOMELY SMELLS :: THE HONEY PIES :: HONEYBEAM :: HORROR MY FRIEND :: HORSE LORDS :: HOSPITAL THE MUSICAL :: HOT MESS :: HOT WINGS :: HOUSE IN THE TALL GRASS :: HOUSE OF JADE :: HOWL AT THE MOON :: HOWL N' BONES :: HOWLING BELLS :: THE HOWLING FOG :: HUBRIS :: HUMBLE BEE :: HUMMINGBIRD :: HUMPHREY B. BEAR :: HUNGRY KIDS OF HUNGARY :: THE HUNTED CROWS :: HURRICANE JANE :: HURRICANES :: THE HUSHES :: HUSTLE HOUSE :: HUXLEY :: THE HYDES :: HYDROMEDUSA :: I, A MAN :: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT WEEZER :: I HEART HIROSHIMA :: I, ICARUS :: ICE ON MERCURY :: ID :: IDLY BY :: IGGY POP & THE STOOGES :: IIAH :: ILLICIT EVE :: IMMIGRANT UNION :: IMOGEN BRAVE :: IMPARTIAL :: THE IMPOSSIBLE QUICHE :: THE INCHES :: INDIAGO :: INSOMNICIDE :: INSTITUT POLAIRE :: INTERCOOLER :: INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF MOJO :: THE INTERNET :: INTERPOL :: INTERSECTION :: INTERZONE EXPRESS :: INTROVERT :: INUETTE :: INWOODS :: IRAAN SANADZADEH :: IRIDIUM :: IRIE KNIGHTS :: THE IRRESPONSIBLES :: ISAAC THOMAS :: ISLE OF CAPRI :: ISLE OF VISION :: IT'S A HOAX :: IT'S A HOAX (INSTRUMENTAL) :: IT'S NOT A PHASE :: IT'S WARSAW :: IVORY :: THE JAY WALKERS :: J-LO BIAFRA :: J-WAH :: JACK HARLON & THE DEAD CROWS :: JACK LONDON :: JACKSON FIREBIRD :: JACKULSON :: JAMES HICKEY :: JAMES PARRY :: JANE'S ADDICTION :: JAPAM :: JAPANDROIDS :: JAPANTHER :: JARVIS :: JARVIS COCKER :: JASON KATSARAS :: JASON SIMON (DEAD MEADOW) :: JAY WALKER AND THE PEDESTRIANS :: JAYNE-ANNE POWER :: JAYNE DOE :: JEFF MARTIN & TEREPAI RICHMOND :: JESS DAY :: JESS JOHNS :: JESS KENT :: JESS PORTER :: JESSE DAVIDSON :: JESSE DAVIDSON BAND :: JESSE FRANCIS :: JESSICA RAE :: JESUS CHRIST POSSE :: JETTISON :: THE JEZABELS :: JIKA :: JIMMY & THE MIRRORS :: JIMMY EAT WORLD :: JIMMY MARIN :: JIMMY MOUNTAIN :: JIMMYBAY :: JIMMYBAY & OLLIE KABBANI :: JODECI & SAM :: JOE MCKEE :: JOEL STERN :: JOEL STERN, CURED PINK & TIMOTHY TATE :: THE JOHN STEEL SINGERS :: JOHNNY AMERICAN HORSE :: JOHNNY SEAGULL & THE HOT CHIPS :: JON ADDAMS :: JON ANN :: JON MARCO :: JON MORTIMER :: JONGO BONES & THE BAREFOOT BANDITS :: JONNY BLIZZARD :: JORDAN TITO :: JOSH CALLIGEROS :: JOSHUA JAMES MORPHETT :: JOURNEY WELL SPACE WIZARD :: JOY & SPARKS :: JP COE & THE DELEGATES :: JUDGE MENTAL :: JULIETTE SEIZURE & THE TREMOR DOLLS :: JUMP OVER FENCES :: JUMP! YOU REVOLUTIONARY :: JUNGLE CITY :: JUNGLEMIRE :: JUNIOR V :: JUPITER :: JUPITER (DUO) :: JUPITER LEAD :: JUST DESSERTS :: KAB SAVVY :: KACEY STEPHENSEN :: KAHL WALLIS :: KÁLI SAVILL :: KAMIKAZE :: KAMIKAZE TRIO :: KANGAROO SKULL :: KARL MELVIN :: KASABIAN :: KASAVETT :: KATE VIGO & THE UNDERGROUND ORCHESTRA :: KATIE BRIANNA :: KATIE MILLER :: KATIE POMERY :: KAURNA CRONIN :: THE KAVS :: KAZKARIV :: THE KEEPSAKES :: KELLIE LLOYD :: KELLY MENHENNETT :: KELSHY :: KEMP BROTHERS :: KETTERING :: KHAN :: KIAN :: KICKASS COWGIRLS :: KID SAM :: KIDS IN CULTS :: KIDS WITH TEETH :: KIKUYU :: THE KILL DEVIL HILLS :: KILLED BY CUPID :: KILLER BIRDS :: THE KILLBOT FACTORY :: THE KILLGIRLS :: KILLING CENTRE :: KING DADDY :: KING GIZZARD & THE LIZARD WIZARD :: KING JEFF & THE HOW ARE YOUS :: KING KRILL :: KING KRULE :: KING OF THE NORTH :: KINGS WITHIN :: KINGSTON DOWNES :: KINGSWOOD :: KINS :: KIRK SPECIAL :: KIRK WATT :: KITCHEN WITCH :: KITTEN KONG :: KITTYHAWK :: KLAPTSTAKZ :: KLLO :: KOI CHILD :: KOLEH :: KORAL :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: KOSHER SALAMI :: KOTARA :: KRIS WANDERS :: KRISTINA MILTIADOU :: KUČKA :: KURRULTA PARK :: KURT VILE :: KYLE CHARLES HALL :: KYLIE BRICE TRIO :: KYM RÖBEY & THE DEVIL'S LETTUCE :: KYRI :: KYTES OF OMAR :: L.R. MARSH :: LA FEMME LE FEVER :: LACHY BRUCE :: LADY GUNG-HO & THE ANGELS OF STRANGELOVE :: LADY STRANGELOVE :: THE LADYBEATLES :: LADYHAWKE :: LAHARA :: LANCE LAZER & TALIBAND :: LARSEN :: LAST DAYS OF KALI :: LAST DINOSAURS :: LAST THYLACINE :: THE LAST SUPPER :: LATE NIGHT LIES :: LATE NIGHT MATINEE :: LATER THAT NIGHT :: LAURA HILL :: LAURA IMBRUGLIA :: LAUREN ABINERI :: LAW & DISORDER :: LAZARO'S DOG :: LC3'S :: LEAD WORM :: LEADER CHEETAH :: LEAF & STEM :: LEFT :: LEFT ON SEEN :: LEGENDS OF MOTORSPORT :: LEIGHSTARDUST :: THE LEITMOTIF :: LEITMOTIV LIMBO :: LIVE SLUG REACTION :: LEITH JAMES :: LE GATEAU CHOCOLAT :: LEMMINGS :: LEMURIAN :: LENI :: LENIN MCCARTHY :: LEO :: LEAPING FELIX :: LES SAVY FAV :: THE LEVITATORS :: LEX MONSERRAT :: LICKITY SPLIT :: LIFE IN LETTERS :: LIGHTS :: LIKE KITES :: LIKE LEAVES :: LIL VALENTINE :: LILAC COVE :: LILY MOJITO :: LILY ROSE :: LILLY SIM :: LILLYS RADIO :: LIMB KING :: LIMBS AKIMBO :: LINE HONOURS :: LIPSMACK :: LITTLE BRIDGET :: LITTLE CAPTAIN :: LITTLE DRAGON :: LITTLE DUST :: LITTLE ICE AGE :: LITTLE PRINCE :: LITTLE TWO EYES :: LIZARD PEOPLE :: THE LIZARDS :: LLAMAGEDDON :: LLEWELLYN THOMAS :: LO! :: LOADED LEOPARD :: LOCAL REVOLUTION :: LOEMAX :: THE LOFTY MOUNTAIN BAND :: LOLA :: THE LONDON ROAD POETS :: THE LONELINESS OF A MIDDLE DISTANCE RUNNER :: LONELY FIRE :: LONELYSPECK :: LONG WALK HOME :: LONI RAE :: LOOCH :: LOON LAKE :: LOOPOLE :: LORDE :: LOREN KATE :: LOS PALMS :: LOST COSMONAUT :: LOST IN TRANSLATION :: THE LOST SHOW :: LOST VALENTINOS :: LOST WOODS :: LOUIS DONNARUMMA :: LOUIS FARK :: LOUISE ADAMS :: LOUISE & THE TORNADOS :: LOUISE ADAMS & THE FRINGE DWELLERS :: LOVE CREAM :: THE LOVE JUNKIES :: LOVE OF DIAGRAMS :: LOVE STEREO :: LOVE ZOMBIES :: THE LOVES :: LUCI :: LUCINDA GRACE :: THE LUCKSMITHS :: LUCY THE BAND :: LUCY ZOLA :: LUKE ASHBY BAND :: LUKE CARLINO :: LUKE DUX :: LUKE ESCOMBE :: LUKE EYGENRAAM :: LUKE GOLDING :: THE LUKE LOUIE TRIO :: LUMENS :: LUMONICS :: MABIINA PARTY :: LYLA :: MAC DEMARCO :: MACH PELICAN :: MACKENZIE :: MAD SHAPES :: MADCLASSIC :: MADURA GREEN :: MAGGIE & LOUIS :: THE MAGGIE PILLS :: MAGIC BONES :: MAGIC MOUNTAIN :: THE MAGNETS :: MAISIE :: MAISIE B :: MAJOR SHADE :: MAKING :: MALLRAT :: MAMMAL :: MAMMOTH :: MAMMOTH LOGIC :: THE MAN HIMSELF :: MANE :: MANI NEUMEIER & THE BITCHES OF ZEUS :: MANNEQUIN DEATH SQUAD :: MANNIX :: MANOR :: MANSIONAIR :: MÄNTRÄ :: THE MARABY BAND :: MARCUS COROWA :: MARCUS WARNECKE & SAM PORTER :: MARDEN :: MARGARET LLOYD & SEB TONKIN :: MARK CURTIS :: MARK CURTIS BAND :: MARK CURTIS & THE FLANNELETTES :: MARLA SINGER :: MARY TREMBLES :: MARY WEBB :: MASEGO :: MASSIVE :: MASTER'S CURIOUS DELIRIUM :: THE MATEHS :: MATHEMATIC :: MATHIEU WERCHOWSKI :: MATT BANHAM :: MATTHEW BARLOW :: MATT HAYWARD :: MATTHEW MILES :: MATT WARD DUO :: MATT WARD & THE RISING SONS :: MATT ZENGERER :: MAUVE :: THE MAX HEADROOM :: MAX SAVAGE :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS :: MAYDAY FAIR :: MAYFIELD :: MCKISKO :: MEAKE :: MEANWELL COLLEGE :: THE MEDICS :: MEGAFAUNA :: MELLOW YELLOW :: MELTON PEACH :: MEMORY CASTLES :: MENAGERIE :: MERCY ARMS :: THE MERCY KILLS :: MERE THEORY :: THE MESS HALL :: MESSRS :: METHYL ETHEL :: METZ :: MEZZA, ROACH & HOG :: MEZZANINE :: MICHAEL STOWERS :: MICHAELA JENKE :: MICK ARMSTRONG, ANDY ARMSTRONG & STAN BASTIRAS :: THE MIDDLE EAST :: MIDDLE KIDS :: MIDNIGHT JUGGERNAUTS :: THE MIDNIGHT MARES :: THE MILTON EXPERIENCE :: MIKE MCKEON :: MIKE RADZEVICIUS :: MIKE TILBROOK :: MIKEY (EX ARTAX MISSION) :: MINDSHOWER :: MIO :: MIRRORLINE :: THE MISCHIEF :: MISCHIEF THE CAT :: MISS GOLLY GOSH :: MISS OHIO :: MISS RENEE SIMONE :: THE MISSION IN MOTION :: MM9 :: MODERN DAY RIOT :: MODERN RELICS :: MOGERLAINE :: MOLLY ROCKET :: THE MOLTING VULTURES :: MOMOKO SODA :: MONA LISA OVERDRIVE :: THE MONDAYS :: MONDO PHASE BAND :: MONEY FOR ROPE :: THE MONIKERS :: MONKEY PUZZLE TREE :: THE MONSTER SOCIETY OF EVIL :: MONTES JURA :: MOODY BELLES :: THE MOON DIGITS :: MOONFAKER :: MOONHUNTER :: MORALS OF A MINOR :: THE MORNING AFTER GIRLS :: THE MORS :: THE MORS MODERN MYSTERY SEXTET :: MORTAL AMBITION :: MORTAL WOMBAT :: MOSES SUMNEY :: MOSHPIT GIRLFRIEND :: MOTHER'S CAKE :: THE MOTHERFUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS :: MOTHERSLUG :: THE MOTION BELOW :: THE MOTIVE :: MOTOWN CONNECTION :: MOUNT SELDOM :: MOUNTAIN SONGS :: MOUNTAIN STATIC :: MOUNTAIN STRANGER :: MOUNTAINS IN THE SKY :: MOUNTBATTEN :: MOURGOS GRUND :: THE MOURNING SONS :: MOVE TO STRIKE :: MOVIN' MELVIN BROWN :: M.J. TURNER :: MR. INDUSTRY :: MR ROSEWATER :: MR WEDNESDAY :: MULE :: MUM FRIENDS :: MUM THINKS BLUE :: MUMS FAVOURITE :: MUM'S TENNIS FRIENDS :: MUMFORD & SONS :: THE MUNCH :: MUNCHKIN :: MUSCLE CAR VS HIGH STAKES :: THE MUSHNIKS :: MUSTERED COURAGE :: MUTEMATH :: MY CHÉRIE :: MY DISCO :: MY SISTER THE COP :: MYLES MAYO :: MYSTERY SEA CREATURE :: N.A.S.A. :: NAKATOMI :: NANCY BATES :: NAOMI KEYTE :: NAOMI KEYTE & TANNON KEW :: NATHAN KAYE :: NATHAN MAY :: NATHANAEL ROTHWELL :: NAZZ AND THE RED PONIES :: NELD :: NEO FIX :: NEOHIP :: NEON BOGART :: NEON ELECTRIC :: NEON TETRA :: NEREEDA :: NERVOUS GERBAL :: THE NEW CABAL :: NEW LIFE ODYSSEY :: NEW PANTS :: NEW POLLUTANTS :: NEW TRANSLATION :: NEWGATE CROWD :: THE NEW VAGUE :: NEW WHITE SNEAKERS :: NEW YORK DOLLS :: NEWTONHEATH :: NICHOLAS ALLBROOK :: NICK MURPHY ::NICK OLIVERI :: NICK OLIVERI & FILTHY LUCRE :: NICK VULTURE :: NICKER TEENS :: NICŌ SAKŪRASŪKÉ :: NIGEL KOOP & STEVIE BEE :: NIGHT RITES :: NIGHT RITES X THUNDER SPEAKS :: NIKAI :: NIKKO :: NIKKO & SNOOKS :: NINA MCCANN :: NIPSLIP :: NITIDUS :: NO BIRDS :: NO LEMMIN :: NO NO NO NO NO :: NO THROUGH ROAD :: NO ZU :: NOBODY KNEW THEY WERE ROBOTS :: NOCTURNAL ANIMALS :: NONA MONA :: NORMAL BEHAVIOUR :: NOT FOR HUMANS :: THE NOVOCAINES :: NTH RD :: NUCLEAR FAMILY :: THE NURSERY - BABY DRAG NIGHT :: NUSEUM :: NUSSY :: NUVO :: THE NYMPHS :: O' LITTLE SISTER :: OATH OF DAMNATION :: OCEAN ALLEY :: THE OCEAN PARTY :: OCEANICS :: ODYSSEY :: THE OFFCUTS :: OH MERCY :: OH MINOR :: OH MY GUARD! :: OIL! :: OISIMA :: OKKERVIL RIVER :: OKO :: OLD MATE :: OLIVER CARR'S CARR ACCIDENT :: OLIVER TREE :: OLIVERS ARMY :: OLLIE ENGLISH :: OLLIE KABBANI :: OLLY HOLMES :: OMERTIA :: ONE THOUSAND COUPLES :: ONION :: ONLY OBJECTS :: ONNIE ART :: THE ORBWEAVERS :: ORELIA :: ORIANE & KALIOPI :: ORPHAN OF KOS :: OSCAR THE WILD :: THE OSCILLATORS :: OSH10 :: OUTSIDE LINES :: OVERVIEW EFFECT :: OWLS OF THE SWAMP :: PABLO LIBIDO & THE WHITE ROBOTS :: THE PACKETS :: PAGAN :: PAIGE RENEE COURT :: PALACE OF THE KING :: PALEFACE :: THE PANDA BAND :: PANACEA :: PANOPTIQUE ELECTRICAL :: PAPA VS PRETTY :: PAPER ARMS :: THE PAPER SCISSORS :: PAPER SNORKEL :: PAPER SUNSETS :: PARADES :: PARADISE CLUB :: PARTY :: PARTY DOZEN :: PAT THE RAT :: PATRIARCHAL DEATH MACHINE :: PATRICK SARACINO :: PAUL KELLY :: PEACH FUR :: PEACHES & HERM :: PEABODY :: PEANUT BUTTER CRACK BABIES :: PEARL TIZZIE :: PELVIS :: PEMBERTON :: PENELOPE SUICIDE :: PENNY IKINGER :: PERFECT PUSSY :: PERSIA & THE GEORGE GRIFSAS QUARTET :: PEST CONTROL :: THE PET SHOP BOYS :: PETER COMBE :: THE PHARAOHS :: PHI THEODOROS :: PHILADELPHIA GRAND JURY :: THE PHOBIAS :: PHOENIX :: PIERS DIPROSE :: PIMPIN' HORUS :: PINK DUKE :: PINK NOISE GENERATOR :: PINK WASABI :: PINKISH BLU :: PINKY BEECROFT & THE WHITE RUSSIANS :: PIPE GUY :: PIPE GUY VS BUCK IT :: PIRATE COWBOY :: PIST IDIOTS :: PISTOL SHRIMP :: THE PITS :: PITY LIPS :: PIVOT :: THE PIXIES :: PLACEBO :: PLACEMENT :: PLAGUE KEEPER :: PLANET CACTUS :: PLANET OF THE 8S :: THE PLEASURE OF BOOKS :: PLUG IN CITY :: PNAU :: POCKET ACE :: THE PODS INTERROBANG :: POETIKOOL JUSTICE :: POLADROIDS :: POLY & THE STATICS :: POND :: PONY DANCE :: PONYTAIL KINK :: THE POP-UPS :: POPY JANE :: POPEYE & OLIVE OYL :: PORCHLIGHT PARADE :: PORT HONEY :: POST DEATH POST :: POWER SPRITES :: PREHISTORIC DOUCHE :: THE PRESETS :: PRESTON'S HISTORIC PUNCH & JUDY SHOW :: PRETTY UGLY :: PRINCE RAMA :: PRINCESS ONE POINT FIVE :: PROBLEMS :: THE PRODIGY :: THE PRO-TOOLS :: THE PROPHETS OF IMPENDING DOOM :: PSYCHEDELIC P*RN CRUMPETS :: PSYCHIC 5 :: PSYCHO DEREK & THE RE-ISSUES :: THE PSYCHONAUTS :: PUBLIC HOLIDAY :: THE PUBLIC SERVANTS :: PUNK JAZZ MONORAIL :: PURÉE :: PURITY RING :: PURR :: PUT DOWNS :: PSYCHOBABEL :: QUA :: QUANTUM CHAOS :: QUARTZ PISTOL :: QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE :: QUEBEC ECHO :: QUEST :: QUESTION QUESTION :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: QUIET TRAMSTOP :: RACCOON CITY :: RACHEL CEARNS :: RACHEL CEARNS & THE VALKYRIES :: RADIANT CITY :: RADICALS :: RADIO SPECTACULAR!!! :: RADIO STAR :: RADIX :: RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE :: THE RAGING POPULATION :: RAINDROP :: RAMA RAMA :: RAPID TRANSPORT :: RAPSCALLION :: THE RAPTURE :: RAT CATCHER :: RAT TA'MANGO :: RAUCOUSTRA :: RAURY :: THE RAVEONETTES :: RAY MANTA :: THE READYMADES :: THE REAL MAC :: REALIST FEW :: REALM :: RED APPARITION :: RED COATS :: RED DESERT OCEAN :: THE RED EARTH BLUES BAND :: RED INK :: THE RED PAINTINGS :: RED SEA :: THE RED SUN BAND :: REGIONALS :: REGULAR JOHN :: REGURGITATOR :: RELYING ON LUCK :: REJUSA :: THE REMEMBERZ :: RENDEZVOUS WITH RAMA :: THE REPROBETTES :: REPTILES :: RETRIEVER :: REVERSES :: REX ORANGE COUNTY :: RICH DAVIES & AYLEEN O'HANLON :: RICH DAVIES & THE LOW ROAD :: RICHARD BECK GROUP :: RICHARD IN YOUR MIND :: RICKY ALBECK & THE BELAIR LINE BAND :: RICKY KICKONS ALLSTAR JAM :: RICOCHET PETE :: RIDE INTO THE SUN :: RIFFWRATH :: RIN MCARDLE :: RIN & THE RECKLESS :: RINCON :: RINGO STALIN :: RIOT RUNNERS :: RIPCORD :: RISEMANN :: RITES WILD :: RIVER OF SNAKES :: RMJ :: ROAD WINGS :: ROB EDWARDS :: ROBOTOSAURUS :: ROCKET SCIENCE :: THE ROCKETEERS :: ROCKY'S PRIDE & JOY :: ROGER THAT :: ROGUE ROMANTIC :: THE ROLLBACKS :: THE ROLLERCANES :: ROLLING BLACKOUTS COASTAL FEVER :: ROMANA ASHTON & THE REEDS :: RON THE OX :: THE ROOFTOPS :: ROOK :: RORY O'CONNOR :: ROSE CLOUSEAU :: ROSEMONT :: ROSS DE CHENE HURRICANES :: ROTE MARE :: ROWENA :: ROYAL BLOOD :: THE ROYAL GALA :: ROYAL HEADACHE :: THE RUBENS :: RUBY FIELDS :: RULE OF THIRDS :: THE RULES :: RUN THE JEWELS :: RUNEBILLY RATTLE :: RUNNING WITH HORSES :: RUNNING WITH SCISSORS :: RUNZELSTIRM & GURGLESTOCK :: RURU 432 :: RURU 432 & NU ARTICLE :: RUSSIA :: RUSSIAN TEAMMATE :: RYAN MARTIN JOHN :: RYAN MEEKING & THE FEW :: RYAN OLIVER :: SACRED SHRINES :: SAILMAKER :: SAILORS AND SWINE :: SAINT HUCK :: SAINT JACQUES :: SAINT JACQUES DUO :: THE SALVADORS :: SAM PAGE :: SAM WOOLFORD :: SAMPA THE GREAT :: SAN CISCO :: THE SAN SEBASTIAN :: SARAH BLASKO :: SARAH CHADWICK :: SASHA MARCH :: SASHA MARSH & THE DAWNHORSE :: SASKWATCH :: SATAN'S CHEERLEADERS :: SATIN HAREM :: SATIN SUN :: SAUL WILLIAMS :: SAVAGES :: SAVING SAVANAH :: SAWCY PAWS :: THE SCARE :: THE SCARFS :: THE SCARLET IVES :: SCHOOL OF RADIANT LIVING :: THE SCOUNDRELS :: SCREAMFEEDER :: SCREAMING GIBBON :: SE BON KI RA :: THE SEA THIEVES :: SEA URCHIN & ALLIES :: SEABASS :: SEABELLIES :: SEAMUS ANTHONY :: SEAN DESMOND :: SEAN KEMP :: SECRETS IN SCALE :: SEEKAE :: SERAPHINA SINCLAIR :: SERENDIPITY :: SERGIO MIMOSA & THE BING BANG BOOM FIVE :: THE SERRA :: SEVENTEEN FIFTY SEVEN :: SEX ON TOAST :: SEX WIZARD :: SEX UNCLE :: SEXUAL DAD :: THE SEXY BOYS BLUES BAND :: THE SHADOW LEAGUE :: THE SHADOW MINISTERS :: SHADOWQUEEN :: THE SHAHS :: THE SHAKE UP :: SHAMAN EYES :: SHAMAN SON :: THE SHAMBOLICS :: SHAME SPIRAL :: SHAME :: SHANGHAI WENDY :: SHANGRILA :: THE SHAOLIN AFRONAUTS :: SHAPES DIVIDE :: SHARK IN THE DARK :: SHE SAID YOU :: SHE'S THE BAND :: SHILOH :: THE SHINE :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS :: SHIVERS :: SHODASHI :: SHOJI HANO :: SHORT GALLIGAN :: SHY RHINO :: SIAMESE :: SIANNA LEE :: SIBERIAN TIGER :: SIDEWALKS :: S.I.G.I.T. :: SILENT DUCK :: THE SILENTS :: SIMON & JENNY :: SIMON ABERLE :: SIMPLE PLEASURES :: SIN CITY :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY :: SIR GERBIL :: SISTER ROSE :: SITARA :: THE SKATEGOATS :: THE SKELETON CLUB :: SKELETONS :: SKIES :: SKINPIN :: SKIPPING GIRL VINEGAR :: SKYBOMBERS :: SKYLA :: SKYTHIEF :: SKYE HARBOUR :: SLAMAGOTCHI :: SLAVE GIRLS FROM BEYOND INFINITY :: SLEEP PARADE :: SLEEP TALK :: SLEEPTALKER :: THE SLEEPY JACKSON :: SLICK ARNOLD :: SLICKER DRIPS :: SLINGSHOT DRAGSTER :: SLIPPERY PEOPLE :: THE SLOE RUIN :: SLOWDIVE :: SLOWMANGO :: SLOWLY SLOWLY :: SLY HATS :: SMALL AFFAIRS :: SMASHING PUMPKINS :: SMILE :: THE SMITH STREET BAND :: THE SMITHS vs RADIOHEAD :: THE SMOCKS :: SMOKE NO FIRE :: SMUDGE STAIN :: SNAKADAKTAL :: SNAP TO ZERO :: SNAPDRAGON :: THE SNOWDROPPERS :: SNOWMAN :: SO.CRATES :: ...SO YEAH :: SODA :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE :: SOJOURN :: SOMNIUM :: SOMNIUM DUO :: SOMMNIUM :: SONATINE :: THE SONGS OF TOM SMITH :: SONIC DEATH MONKEY :: SONS OF SERPENT :: SONS OF ZÖKU :: SOUR SOB :: SOURSOB BOB :: SOURSOP :: SOUTH FROM SOMEWHERE :: THE SOUTH SEASON :: SOUTHPAW :: SOUTHPOOR :: SOYLENT GREEN :: SPACE COYOTE :: SPACEY JANE :: SPANK ROCK :: SPARKSPITTER :: SPARTAK :: SPECIAL PATROL :: SPEED MACHINE :: SPIKE THE RIVER :: SPILT CITIES :: SPINDICKLE :: SPINE :: THE SPIRES :: SPORTS CAR :: SPOZ SPOZINGTON :: SQUARE :: SQUEAKER :: ST JUDES :: ST. LOKI :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: ST. VINCENT :: STABBITHA & THE KNIFEY WIFEYS :: STACY SAYS :: THE STAIN DRAINS :: STANDARD UNION :: STARS :: STARS YOUNG :: STATE LIBRARY :: THE STEADY ONS :: STEEL TIGER :: STEERING BY STARS :: STEFAN HAUK :: STELLIE :: STEREOLAB :: STEVE SMYTH :: STICKY BEAK :: THE STIFFYS :: THE STILL MOVEMENT :: STISSED :: STOKES :: STONE EYES :: STONEFIELD :: STONEGRILL :: STOP SAYING HELICOPTER :: THE STORM WILL COVER OUR TRACKS :: STORMHORSE :: STORMY-LOU :: STRAIGHT TO VIDEO :: THE STRAIGHT-JACKET TAILORS :: STRAWBRY BLONDE :: STREET LEGAL :: STREETLIGHT :: STREGA :: STRIPES. :: THE STRIPP :: STU DANIELS :: STURT AVENUE :: SUBAUDIBLE HUMM :: SUBMERGE :: SUBTRACT S :: SUBURBAN STANDOFF :: SUGAR ARMY :: SUGAR TONGUE :: SUMI :: SUMMER BLOOD :: SUMMER FLAKE :: THE SUN AND THE SKY :: THE SUNBIRDS :: THE SUNDANCE KIDS :: THE SUNDAY REEDS :: THE SUNDIALS :: THE SUNDIALS PODCAST :: SUNDOWNER :: SUNK LOTO :: SUNSET CITIES :: SUNSETTLER :: SUNSICK DAISY :: SUPER XX MAN :: SUPERBEE :: SUPERCAINE :: SUPERCAINE DUO :: SUPERCAINE DUO (with DUSTY LEE STEPHENSEN) :: SUPERDOSE GANGWAY :: THE SUPERGROUPATOOS :: SUPERGRÜÜP :: SUPERPHATASS :: SUPERSONIC TUMBLEWEED :: SURES :: SURF! TERROR! PANIC! :: SURFER ROSA :: SURVIVING SHARKS :: SUZI STAPLETON :: SWAMP KITTEH :: SWAYBACK :: SWEEPER :: THE SWEET BLUES :: THE SWEET DECLINE :: SWEET GOLD :: SWIMMING :: SWIMSUIT :: THE SWISS :: SWORD IN STONE :: SWORDS :: SXWZD :: SYCAMORE :: SYDONIA :: THE SYSTEMADDICTS :: SYSTEM OF A DOWN :: TABLOIDS :: TABULA RASA :: TALL TALL TREES :: TALVIN SINGH :: TAME IMPALA :: TANTALUM :: THE TANUKI SUIT :: TANYA FROM HR :: TAPE/OFF :: TAPLEYS HILL :: TASH SULTANA :: TAUGHT BY ANIMALS :: TEA :: TEDDY MARS :: TEDDY MARS (SOLO) :: THE TEDDY ROYALS :: TEENAGE CRIME :: TEENAGE JOANS :: TEENAGERSINTOKYO :: TELEPROMPTER :: TEMPER TRAP :: TEMPORAL LOBE :: THE TEMPS :: TERRA AXIS :: TERRA FIRMA :: TGBRANDENBURG TRIO :: THANES :: THEE OH SEES :: THELMA PLUM :: THEM PLASMS :: THEM SWOOPS :: THESE WILD ANIMALS :: THE THIEVES :: THIS CITY SUNRISE :: THIS WAY NORTH :: THOSE MAGNIFICENT SCREAMING BASTARDS :: THOM LION :: THOM LION & THE TAMERS :: THOMA & THE HUMBUGS :: THOMAS CAPOGRECO :: THRASHBOARD :: THROWAWAY :: THUNDER SPEAKS :: THUNDERCLAW :: TIAN HANCOCK :: TIERSMAN :: TIGER CHOIR :: TIGER ET GHOST :: TIL THE BREAK :: TILES :: TILLARY :: TIM KOCH :: THE TIM MCMILLAN BAND :: TIM MOORE :: THE TIMBERS :: THE TIMBERS TRIO :: TIMBERWOLF :: TINY CONSPIRACY :: TINY SPIDERS :: THE TITS :: TKAY & BADCOP :: TKAY MAIDZA :: TODD FOGARTY :: TODD SIBBIN :: TODD SIBBIN & THE ACADIAN DRIFTWOOD :: TODD SIBBINS & THE OPPOSITE ENDS :: TOKYO CITY SEX SHOOTERS :: DJ TOM LOUD :: TOM CAPOGRECO & DUNCAN CAMPBELL :: TOM SMITH :: TOM WEST :: TOM WEST & TODD SIBBIN :: TOM THUM :: TOM UGLY :: TOMORROW IS :: TONES AND I :: TONY FONT SHOW :: TOOB SCOOTS :: TOOL :: TORK :: THE TORRENS :: TORTE E MORT :: THE TOSS :: TOTALLY UNICORN :: THE TOUCH :: TOUGH BOYS :: TOUGH UNCLE :: TOWNHOUSE :: TOWNS :: TOXIC SHOCK :: TRACER :: THE TRAFALGARS :: THE TRANSATLANTICS :: TRANSPORT :: TRASH CITY :: TRAVELLER & FORTUNE :: TREEHOUSE CASINO :: TREEHOUSES :: TREETOPS :: TRENT WORLEY :: TRICIA CATFORD :: TRICK SHOT :: THE TRIPPING LILIES :: TRIS BEAUMONT :: TRIXIE PLAIN :: TROLDHAUGEN :: TRUCE :: TRUCE & THE COLONEL :: TRUCKFIGHTERS :: TRUE HOLIDAY :: TRUTH CORRODED :: TTTDC :: TUCKSHOP :: THE TULLAMARINES :: TULSA :: TUMBLEWEED :: TUSCADERO :: TV THERAPY :: TWICE LICHEN :: TWIN DECOY :: TWINE :: TWITCH :: THE TWOKS :: TWO SUNS :: TWO WAY RADIO :: TXMX :: TY ALEXANDER :: TYCHO :: TYGER TYGER :: TYMPANO :: TYRESWANS :: TZU :: THE UGLY KINGS :: UK SPECIAL :: UKULELE DREAM GIRL :: UNCLE CHUNK :: UNCUT WHITE NOISE :: UNKLE :: UNKNOWN MORTAL ORCHESTRA :: UNPAID DEPT :: THE UNSET :: UNSPOKEN THINGS :: URBAN YOUTH :: URTEKK :: USER :: UTE ROOT :: THE VAINS :: VALENTIINE :: VALIANT JONES :: VALKYRIES :: THE VAMPIRE PROJECT :: VAN CLEEF :: VAN SHE :: VANE OF BARBS :: VANILLA ICE :: THE VANITY CURE :: VANITY ERA :: VARLIIBA :: THE VASCO ERA :: VELVET CHASE :: VELVET SNOW :: VELVET VOID :: VENICE QUEENS :: THE VENICE WHALERS :: VENTILATION EPISODE :: VENTOLIN :: VENTOLYN :: VERONA LIGHTS :: VERZANSKI :: THE VILLENETTES :: THE VILLENETTES (DUO) :: THE VINES :: THE VIOLET CRAMS :: VIOLET HARLOT :: VIOLENT SOHO :: VIRTUE :: VNB :: THE VOLUME :: VOLUME = COLOUR :: VOWEL MOVEMENT :: VOXANGELICA :: WAGONS :: WALKING WITH THIEVES :: WANDERERS :: WALTER MARSH :: THE WAR ON DRUGS :: WAR ROOM :: WARPAINT :: THE WARRING SIGHS :: THE WARSAW FLOWERS :: THE WARSAW PACT :: WASHINGTON :: THE WATERSLIDES :: WAYNE'S LUMBER :: WE ALL WANT TO :: WE AS ART, WE AS ARTISTS :: WE GROW UP :: WEED CAPITAL :: WEEKEND RAGE :: THE WEEVILS :: WEST THEBARTON :: WHAT SO NOT :: WHERE WERE YOU AT LUNCH :: THE WHISKEY GO GO'S :: THE WHISPERERS :: WHITE LUNG :: WHITE RHINO :: THE WHITE STRIPES :: WHITE SUMMER :: WILD OATS :: WILD ROCKET :: THE WILD THINGS :: WILEY RED FOX :: WILLIAM LEE :: THE WILLIAM STREET STRIKERS :: WILLIE MCRAE BAND :: WILLIS DRUMMOND :: WINDOW SHOPPING :: WING DEFENCE :: WINGFIELD :: THE WINTER GYPSY :: THE WINTER GYPSY TRIO :: WINTER MOON :: WINTER'S LAMENT :: WINTERCOATS :: WINTERMILD :: WIREHEADS :: THE WITCH :: WITCH HATS :: WITCH HUNT :: WITCH SPIT :: WOE :: WOLF & CHAIN :: WOLF & CUB :: WOLF ALICE :: WOLFMOTHER :: WOMEN MOVING FURNITURE :: WONDERWALLS JAM BAND REVIVAL BAND :: THE WOOHOO REVUE :: THE WOOLCOCKS :: WORLD WILD :: WREN & THE RESTLESS FEW :: WREN BELLETTE TRIO :: WYLDE THROE :: THE X O EXES :: XANGO :: XL VISION :: THE XX:: YANKEE MACHINE :: THE YARBLES :: YEASAYER :: THE YELLOW WALLPAPER :: YO :: YOSSARIAN :: YOUNG AND RESTLESS :: YOUNG HEARTS FAIL :: YOUNG LIONS :: YOUNG OFFENDERS :: YOUNG RIVER & THE VULTURES OF VIRTUE :: YOUR LOYAL HEARTLESS :: YOUR MOTIVE FOR :: YOUTH & WONDER :: YUSUKE AKAI :: YVES KLEIN BLUE :: ZAC EICHNER :: ZEAL :: ZEEQUIL :: ZEN PANDA :: ZETA :: ZOE BEHAN :: ZOE SALT ::

:: Monday, March 05, 2007

CLUBBED TO DEATH

I've come to the conclusion of late.. lo these many years culminated in pissing on the ashes of rock, lo these many years of utter self destruction and damn near killing myself rotten night after night in countless seedy venues, pubs and nightclubs with all you 24 hour party people in service to the howler monkeys on stage only to be reborn again and again so squeaky clean like WILE E COYOTE that I may indeed be in possession of freakingly awesome superpowers.. sure they may not be one of those fancypants superpowers all them cool kids are fucking about with these days.. wot with all the stopping of the bullets midair, the leaping off of tall buildings and the shooting of the laserbeams out've their arses.. they may very well be really really marginal superpowers, more or less utterly fucking useless for saving the planet or holding me own in a bar fight.. but I still think they're still pretty freakingly awesome all the same.. I mean shit, how else do I explain my inhumane ability to kamikaze headfirst into the nine planes of hell that constitute this live music scene and yet come out the other end with barely a scratch on me? a happy accident with the microwave or a rapidly diminishing IQ? who the fuck knows? all I DO know is that I can no longer be killed by conventional weapons and I may very well not be of this earth, I walk amongst you, I live amongst you, I look and sound just like you but I am not one of you.. and yet despite our differences I shall forever endeavor to use these awesome beer soaking powers to serve the forces of good and NEVER for evil (although considering how much mischief I cause around here, this whole "EVIL" thing tends to be a bit of a grey region ;) )

but of course like any self respecting ubermensch, I couldn't possibly do all this without some wicked cool gadgets to fuck about with.. and as we all know the most infamous in my service would hafta be my ever faithful sidekick.. my digital camera.. my CANON IXUS v3.. in over 4 years I never did give it a name, never really felt the need to, but for the sake of all you sentimental twits who DO.. lets call her "SPARKY" - built like a fucking cockroach and able to withstand an atomic bomb, there is no less a weapon I would ever chose to go into battle with..



but of course, living as we all do in this fast-paced post industrial and post apocalyptic world of accelerative advances and increasing perils to our life, love and liberty, we've gotta constantly update and upgrade or be put 6ft under by the next diabolical flesh eating zombie that comes our way.. a 3 megapixel camera, no matter how bomb proof cannot hope to serve me forever.. and so, it is with this grim purpose of survival in mind that I've finally come to upgrade my camera with this brand new photographic gizmo - the SONY CYBERSHOT DSC-W70.. again, I haven't given it a name.. but for those who do like to give things names I shall henceforth christen her as "FRISBEE" after it's miraculous flying abilities as displayed in the CROWN N ANCHOR this FRIDAY at 2AM (how it didn't shatter on the dancefloor into a million pieces is anyone's guess?)



I wont bore you with the maddening details of how I came to acquire this device, as I went to no store and no cash ever changed hands in it's acquisition (and chances are you wouldn't even believe me if I told you the full scope of it anywaze) suffice to say.. being as it is the new acolyte to the fold, for all the promise this FRISBEE holds, for all it's awesome power.. it's mettle must be tested.. and what better a weekend in bowel evacuating terror than this one to truly put this camera to the challenge.. can it go toe to toe with a battle hardened lunatic like me and survive to tell the tale? we shall see kiddies.. oh yes.. we shall see indeed! MUHAHAHAHAHA!! ;)


THURSDAY NIGHT
our journey begins humbly enough here at the GARDEN OF UNEARTHLY DELIGHTS at 9PM.. yup, just when you thought it was gone for good it has once again rather covertly erupted itself back onto the east parklands moonscape like a foul hallucination fresh from the worst of BAZ LUHRMANN's wildest fantasies, just one week before our official FRINGE opening and looking for trouble.. oh may the ever vengeful sky demons have mercy upon our spleens!



you may remember this place from last year.. you may remember just like the PERSIAN GARDENS it was host to so much infamy and retarding mischief in one month that they had to shut it down and pack it away in boxes lest the rising tide of anarchy engulf this city whole..



this year, however it serves a duel purpose.. for not only does it attract all manner of free thinking anarchists to revel in the wild decadence of artistic depravity this place affords, but also in opening a week early it has formed a rather effective forcefield to fend off all the petrol sniffing zombie hoards in HOLDEN team shirts and fluffy mullets who've descended upon this fair city for the rubber burning fury of the CLIPSAL 500 races this weekend..



if you look carefully, you can almost see them hovering near the freshold, sniffing at the great divide.. attempting to breach this near impenetrable forcefield, only to shriek like chimps when their fingers get zapped.. "AUAUAGHH!! ART AND CULTURE!! IT BURNS!! IT BUURRRNS!!"



of course, as much as culture vultures like to go a wet patch over how wondrous it is to have this place back.. really it's not a fuck of a lot different from last year - there's that same ferris wheel, that same carousel, the same food stalls, the same chips in a cone, that same bigtop venue.. sure the trapeze has been replaced by an altogether different trampoline harness, the SPIEGELTENT has been swapped for an open air dancefloor and there's this new funky shipping container venue stuffed in a corner somewhere.. but really, it's all the same shit from last year, only with a slightly different smell.. where's the novelty I ask's ya, where's the innovation?



but why think such lofty matters when like any self respecting alcoholics there's more important things to do.. and so, soaking up the ambience with overpriced beers ($6 for a TOOHEYS and $7 for a HEINEKEN!? eeeesh!) we whiled away the next few hours watching all the colourful freaks pass us by as we thought up new and more mischevious pranks we could inflict upon Adelaide in the name of art.. aaaaaaah the FRINGE FESTIVAL, it's good to be back! ;)



but, being as this is my pitiful excuse for a live music blog, my rest and relaxation is shortlived as my self destructive impulses drives me to do battle here at the land of eternal twilight, THE ELECTRIC LIGHT HOTEL at 10:30PM..



TRIXIE PLAIN
first up on the menu, we have TRIXIE PLAIN on stage in a hissy fit of smashing percussion, deranged shrieking, fuzzy punk guitars and stoner keyboard flourishes.. coming off altogether like what an exceptionally ugly domestic dispute would sound like if mixed with THE HIVES.. a brilliant display in anger management (as always) and their song "CIRCULAR VIEW" was a particular highlight (hey, they mention my name in the lyrics.. woooo!) but if I listened to this for far too long with a hangover, I swear my head would explode (so remember.. as always kiddies, enjoy TRIXIE PLAIN in moderation.. this shit could kill ya!)







yup, you know this band's asking for trouble when THIS is their setlist.. yeeeouch!



KAMIKAZE
up next at 11:30PM, we have the infamous fuckoff punk act KAMIKAZE.. who've dug a rather deep hole for themselves as far as this blog is concerned as I doubt they'd ever be able to top the a-grade a-bomb performance they unleashed at the CRANKA back in august last year without damn near killing themselves in the process.. who could forget the splattering cows heart? the gashed and bleeding head injuries off the cymbals? the stagedives off the speaker stacks? the howling incoherance? aaaaah.. such memories.. still as much as any other performance would pale in comparison, these monkeys still gave it their all with their own peculiar brand of chainsaw buzzing demolision punk that ended in DICK DALE the singer and YUKKIE the bassist coming to blows on the floor back of stage.. messy as all fuck but like fuck did it rock :)









after the gig I spend the next hour or so pissing it up with LAKEN and SAM from ANGELIK (as they tried to convince me to go on tour with them in SYDNEY at the end of this month.. hmmm?) till the bouncers rather unceremoniously threw us out at 12:30PM..



and so its back to the UNEARTHLY GARDENS to continue to drink myself into a coma.. the misadventures of which wouldn't normally merit much mention in closing this night.. except for a rather surreal moment when I not only accidently crossed paths with KAV TEMPERLEY from ESKIMO JOE, but also witnessed a female singer from local band (who's name I wont mention *cough*) turn up, chat him up and promptly leave with him.. heh, trippy ;)



either way, by about 2:30AM and swirling into incoherancy it was time I bid goodbye to my fellow alcoholics EMMA (the welsh midget), SCOTTY, that crazy chick with the tutu and all the other carnival freaks and get me a taxi the fuck home.. granted, it's not a massive effort by anyone's measure, but something tells me this weekend is only gonna get a whole lot messier from here on in ;)


FRIDAY NIGHT
shuffling back to this mortal plane no worse for wear from last night's misadventures and with my new camera still ready to do battle.. I return once more to the fray, arriving here at the JADE MONKEY at 9PM to see what foul sorcery was afoot..



as per the norm of any given night, I was planning on my usual heavy dosing prescription of COOPERS PALE as supplied by ZAC the psychic bartender (whodafunkit he has his own band too!? freaaaky!) but it appears someone else has altogether different plans for my annihilation tonight..



enter the ever infamous STONER ANDY, who, looking for more refined levels in alcholic debauchery tonight opts for a bottle of red wine instead.. but only on the condition that I also drink 1/2 of it meself.. and so there I am, looking at my still near full COOPERS, looking back at the offered glass of wine.. back and forth.. lost in thought at this befuddling predicament..



aaaaah fuckit.. why not do both? what possible harm could come of this? ;)



not to let STONER ANDY off the hook so easily, I got him mixing it up as well.. clearly if I'm gonna sink to a watery grave, I'm sure as fuck gonna take this mischevious bastard to hell with me.. (we all know this couldn't possibly end well, but who are we not to try this shit at least once?)



200 MOTELS
first band of the night, 200 MOTELS hits the stage at 9:30PM.. and in watching tonight, altogether swirly on wine and beer.. I remember many moons ago when they first started, like fluffy little deer facing the uncoming headlights with their big brown doe eyes, unaware of the impending doom coming to smear them across the tarmac, like a tiny fragile yet cute chick rock mix between PJ HARVEY and THE HOWLING BELLS all nervous and eager.. but now with an EP under their belt, and a bunch of new songs well on the way.. these dudes are downright scary.. they're primal, they're freaking animals maaaan.. that new song, "TALK IS CHEAP"? with all these fuckoff diabolical tribal pounding drums and this terrorist guitar and bass grind that sounds like the demonic summoning of MAYNARD KEENAN.. and that other new concotion, "TO THE GROUND".. it's pure fucking filth.. it freaking eats people and spits out bones maaan! this BAMBI's come to FUCK YOU UP MAN!! WOOOO!! YEAAAAH!! ROCK!!! (either that, or I'm just taking the piss.. coz dammit that 1st animation is so freaking insane! bwahahahahaha! :) )









with 200 MOTELS finished, and with the splintering wreckage of their instruments hosed off the stage for the next band, I decide to make a quick detour across the square and down the road to the CRANKA.. to catch another band already in session..



KASAVETT
as I arrive at 10:20PM to catch the 2nd half of KASAVETT's set.. short, sharp, gnashing terrier tinged british style punk rock.. just like the pissy aggression of THE HIVES, the indie pop-hooks of mid 90's UK act ASH and snarly microphone inhaling sounds of GREENDAY in their prime before they sold out and utterly sucked balls with their latest emo opus "AMERICAN IDIOT".. yup, they're scrawny little fuckers (well, except for the drummer who kinda looks like HUMPHREY B BEAR with a hangover) but damn can they bash out a good tune.. well worth the brief detour methinks :)







arriving back at JADE MONKEY at 10:45PM I finish off the last of that bottle of red.. only to be greated by a 2nd bottle of wine.. and so, not to be outdone.. I front up with another beer..



TOKYO CITY SEX SHOOTERS
TOKYO CITY SEX SHOOTERS are already in full swing on stage.. cooking up a blissful swirling incoherancy in space cadet 60's funk and SESAME STREET tinged psychedelia that rather well compliments the blurring incoherancy and hooting braindamage I've reached in my furthering intoxicant'cy tonight (check it out, I just invented me a word there!).. all the swirling gonzo keyboard melodies, the fuzzing and buzzing riffs, the nursery rhyme lyrics, the theatrical masks, that wacky robot drummer in lights.. it's all making perfect sense to my brain.. like TENACIOUS D meets 60's PINK FLOYD in all their childish SYD BARRET brilliance.. it may sound like a car crash on paper.. but when yer sliding blissfully down that slippery slope of alcoholism into one helluva skull splitting migraine come tomorrow.. this shit is GOLD baby, GOLD!! :)






QUIET CHILD
next band.. QUIET CHILD at 11:45PM materialises as if from nowhere, perhaps they were there all along hiding in the shadows like creeping executioners.. perhaps I'm totally out've me fucking gourde.. all I do know is that the 2nd bottle of wine is already gone, I'm back on the beers again and reality is nowhere to be seen.. sonically the band are like the melodic melancholy of THE DEFTONES mixed the brooding creep of TOOL, sprinkled sporadically and made occassionally fluffy and light by all these noodling lighter songs reminiscent of TEAM SLEEP (just not nearly as wanky).. they're technically flawless, freaking brilliant musicians and yet me and STONER ANDY are still barking insane and heckling them between songs.. somehow they don't seem to mind.. sure we may be pissed out've our eyeballs and acting like dumbarse giggling dickheads.. but at least we appear to be an appreciative audience none-the-less..






with QUIET CHILD dissolving into the darkness that spawned them, JADE MONKEY slowly emptying out close to 1AM.. and with us idiots nowhere near close to ending this misadventure anytime soon, we next make our way down to the CRANKA..



making our way to what would normally be a spilling wreckage in uncoordinated flailing and projectile vomiting on the dancefloor.. we are altogether surprised when we stumble upon some familiar faces in an altogether uncharacteristic peaceful and tranquil moment of repose.. hmmmmm.. perhaps we've found them in their true natural state.. perhaps their characteristic and infamous slapstick lunacy is merely a ruse? or is JOE BLOGS here attempting to catch up on months of unpublished backlog blogs using nothing but the power of his brain? the mind boggles :P



not one to appear out've place and infinitely more attuned to the multidimensional swirling bong frequencies that only he understands.. STONER ANDY blends in with the silent gathering..



aaaaaaaw, how cute.. look at KATE and EZZ, so happy, so tranquil, so at peace with the inner flow of the universe.. can we take them home? huh? huh!?? can we!? :P



this peace of course is soon shattered when this retarded baboon comes stumbling in thru the door and fucks up everything in his path with his hyperactive dance-moves.. "WEEEE!! WAAA!! WOOO!! WOOO!!" as quite like a tornado.. SPOZ on the piss destroys all who dares stand before him! (note: for best result try playing this animation to CHEMICAL BROTHER's "DIG YOUR OWN HOLE".. it'll freaking melt your face off... woooooo!)



or at least he does before ultimately crashing to floor and taking several unwitting victims like SIMONE here with him (coz obviously I'm perfectly in control and the forces of gravity are at fault!)



yup, trust a goofyarse idiot like me to bust up a perfectly good bit of 1AM meditation and inner reflection at the CRANKA with my piss minder antics (and seriously, who the FUCK put that plastic cup on my head like a teeny hat damnit!!?? grrrrr..)



and so, with my corrupting influence, it's all rapidly downhill spiralling into oblivion from here..



although oblivion can look rather appealing.. hmmmmmmm.. where DID my brain go!? ;)



yup, we're class acts all the way baby! all the way to where exactly I wouldn't know (but something tells me wherever it goes, it wouldn't be able to navigate it's way thru the befuddling conundrum of whether the exit is a PUSH or PULL door.. *ow, smacked me head again!*)



and yet still as much as we're having so much fun resetting our brains to the gurgling level of a baked potato, after a few hours of this we'd clearly had enough and were seriously in need of a quick escape that won't require a confusing doorknob to navigate..



and so intellectually fulfilled, culturally enriched, and altogether vibrating at the same frequencies as the 11th dimensional quantum string filaments that hold this universe in cohesion.. we depart from our hooting monkey cage like conquering heroes disappearing into the shadows of the night, as I leave at 3:30AM and off to my late night bus home..



thus bringing to a close another chapter in my contemplative and empirical study towards uncovering the many varied cultural flavours and nuances of our post modern 21st century human condition *burp* whoaaa.. that last beer burp taste like wine.. eeeeeeeeeeeeee! I'm a goldfish! I'm a goldfish! *walls spinning.. unconciousness*


SATURDAY NIGHT
despite any and all available documented lore and word-of-mouth rumour that would claim otherwise, knocking off what amounted to an entire bottle of red and 4-5 COOPERS PALES (sometimes even at the same time.. and yes, once even gargled like mouth wash in the same gulp) did not eventuate in the mother of all hangovers today.. there was no splitting migraine, no seasick churning stomach, no furry tongue.. dammit, it was like I woke up today a clean slate.. like nothing happened.. like I somehow did indeed possess freakingly awesome yet incredibly marginal superpowers.. even more surprising still.. my new camera, aka: FRISBEE, which I christened as such after having it tossed to me across the dancefloor of the CRANKA last night only to miss my hands entirely to smack into the stage floor while it's LENS was still extended (thus leading to much frantic popping of the lens back INTO place for the next 5 minutes till it would retract) is still surprisingly (with a bit of physical therapy) fully operational and ready for round 3 of carnage I'll inflict on it tonight.. as I arrive here at the ROCKET BAR at 9:30PM..



LADY STRANGELOVE
first up tonight at 10PM, we have the welcome return of the psychedelic wingnuts LADY STRANGELOVE.. who last melted the faces of many way back in DECEMBER.. since disappeared to dimensions unknown for a few months.. only to return once more tonight, fresh and stinky with pungent mushroom spores to irradiate the air, reign in the pulsating chromatic folds of the infinite and spit it all out in kaleidoscopic cascades like frosty fruit loops to our malfunction senses.. (hmmmm.. shit, come to think of it, reading that last sentence I think that red wine really DID destroy my brain last night.. oh well, doubt anyone will notice) and since it's been a few months between nibbling the peyote cactus.. their sound is more direct and obvious tonight, I can actually recognise elements, even quite possibly coherant lyrics.. it's like I've had a rare moment to peer behind the wizard's curtain to see the midget pulling those wires and everything's too distinct and linear.. and yet, after a few beers and my accumilative weekend dementia, the effect still works.. even a little raw they still fuck you up good n proper ;)









PIVOT
up next following LADY STRANGELOVE at 11:30PM, and headlining tonight we have PIVOT from SYDNEY.. a tripped out ambient / downtempo breaks act similar to MELBOURNE act MOUNTAINS IN THE SKY who last played here back in OCTOBER, and like their interstate contemporaries they're primarly a 2 piece act (although mysteriously only until recently they were actually a 5 piece) one member on drums, the other alternating on guitars and keys.. you could almost consider them clones.. except these guys do seem to come off as more jazzy, minimal, contemplative, spikey and skeletal in their percussion groove.. there's elements of DJ SHADOW's "PRIVATE PRESS" album in here and the visuals are altogether trippy.. but after a while your senses do tend to drift a bit.. still as a loungy listening experiences go, it's quite cool to nod your head and bug out to ;)








after the gig, I continue to piss on.. momentarily bumping into JOSH the AFRO EXPERIENCE from LADY STRANGELOVE and the two dudes from PIVOT.. likely lost in conversation over the intricate hydroponic and engineering skills required to effectively design a triple barreled gravity bucket bong that encompases your entire house whilst also acting as a backlit hamster run (although clearly I've just misheard a few words in passing, so don't quote me on this..)



for cheap retarding shits n giggles I next challenge JOSH and the drummer from PIVOT to a battle of the AFROs.. I dont think there was any clear winner in the first round since they both seem to possess spectularily large fro-domes, but after the 2nd round with the spastic rubber-necked chicken dance off, it was all too clear who was gonna claim ultimate victory tonight..



however with the time ticking over 1AM, and with my IQ dipping dangerously below that which would be required to safely navigate the stairs to the exit without making a piano accordian of myself.. I thought a change of scenery was in order.. and so I bid my farewell to my fellow technicolour cosmonauts and floated out've the door for journeys beyond.. journey's to the east.. journey's to further my explorations in the nuance of beer.. aaaaaaaah beeer :)



it was somewhere in the CRANKA that I soon bumped into JOE BLOGS, apparently still alive after last night's misadventures, although from all appearances considerably less mentally coherant.. apparently we were embarking on a mission to the UNEARTHLY GARDENS to seek out SIMONE.. not that you would ever know from this display in human origami as JOE BLOGS proceeded to jump off and into a series of industrial objects time and time again like an oversized lemming..



as it turns out when we collected her, SIMONE was even more howlingly drunk than JOE BLOGS was, as she'd earned her stripes this evening by spending the entire night drinking every single one of her lesser colleagues under the table at some work function.. she told us many a strange thing in our travels from the GARDENS.. such as how originally she had a matching gold cowboy hat to this themed outfit, that hat got mysteriously stolen, only to be swapped for silver tie she nicked off a gay guy, before he ducked off to get lucky, before a striptease pole dancing routine she performed on the carousel to the amusement of many passers by.. the rest of what she says gets lost in translation, but I do remember her nearly getting run over by a passing car whilst telling her story on the way to the ATM and shrieking ever so hilariously "NOOO!! NOOO!!, YOU CAN'T RUN ME OVER!! I'M EVER SO PRETTY!!" aaaah yes, SIMONE.. you do so very much rock! :)



obviously in dealing with these fine fools, and with my brain rapidly sinking into the same grinning oblivion myself.. there was only one thing for it.. and so, in a repeat performance of last night, we ended up at the CRANKA once more to fuck shit up..



it is here that we gathered a growing army of fellow idiots around us (hmmmm, this really doesn't look promising for our collective sanity but at least we've got safety in numbers.. right? riiight? ;) )



before finally deciding in our ultimate wisdom to make an early appearance at SHOTZ at 2:30AM.. how the hell they ever let fools like us thru the door is anyone's guess (although clearly if they were to refuse people like us at a time like this, this place would whistling on empty most SATURDAY nights.. thank fuck for the comedic power of alcohol aye? ;) )



upon breaching the entry, like kamikaze twits we all swarmed over the dancefloor..



along the way experimenting with such avante-garde routines as THE WHEELBARROW here..



only to be completely upstaged by this guy, who in his ultimate display of retro niche 80's dance moves, busts out with the YO-YO funk jam (oh yes.. mark my words, just like all yo-yo crazes before it, walk in here next week and you'll find y'self upto your armpits in this shit.. hahaha!)



SEAN KEMP accidently stumbles upon the scene of the crime somewhere around 3AM..



and as always, then proceeds to mug for every single photo opportunity that he can (lets just be thankful he at least wasn't near drunk enough to get his moonbeams out tonight.. eeeeeeee!)



in fact half the time I didn't even realise the crafy bastard was there hiding out in the background till after I took the photo, spoiling this otherwise ever so stylish shot.. grrrrr.. dammit ;)



around 4AM things then took a particularly novel and mischevious twist into the surreal when SARA and SIMONE both collectively bought themselves a tray of 5 shots each.. hmmmm?



only to collectively melt the faces off of everyone around them as they indulged in a little bit.. of.. *gulp*.. oh crap.. I can't.. type.. can't look away.. yup, if the hilarious stunned goldfish expression on ZOOTROY's face in the background could say one thing.. it'd be.. "whooaaaaaaaa.a.a.aa.. duuuuuuu..uu..uu..ude.. this is soooooooo freaaaking aaaa...a.aaa.aaawesome!"



*phew* that was so damn hot, I think SIMONE actually burnt herself.. yeeeouch!



and whilst the rest of us collect our jaws that've dropped to the floor, collect the tongues that've rolled out like tickertape, the hearts pounding cartoon style metre's out've our chest and the eyeballs bouncing like ping-pong balls to the ends of the venue.. SARA and SIMONE piss themselves laughing at all the carnage they unleashed in the last 5 minutes and continue to frolick like mischevious imps.. *ahem* yeah.. I think, maybe for the saftey of everyone out there with weak heart conditions who've just died from witnessing that, it may be best for all of us if we leave the rest of the night here untold.. eeeeeeeeee!



since seriously, what good ever comes from SHOTZ at 5AM I ask's ya? especially not for JOE BLOGS who had the grand misfortune of being called by emergency SMS to his work, as apparently their computer server was punching above 28 degrees and close to suffering a critical meltdown (near critical meltdown? obviously, there's a message in there for all of us.. hmmmmm ;) )



suffice to say.. after somehow extricating ourselves from that fullmoon pheremone sweat pit.. after staggering all the way down RUNDLE MALL in an incoherant blur.. we miraculously found our way safely to waiting taxis and the hell out've there.. most of us probably none the wiser the next day of what really transpired that night.. eeeeeeee! :)


SUNDAY NIGHT
after what I've survived upto this point I should be glassy eyed and licking windows with nothing but a test pattern and a 800 Hz signal noise ringing in the empty chasm that once contained my brain.. I should be gargling peanut butter in a pile of leaves.. I should be beached somewhere on the west coast of AUSTRALIA with a lost expression on my face whilst a team of volunteers splash water on me and figure how the fuck to throw me back in the ocean.. what the hell am I doing still alive? and why oh WHY am I going out for the 4th night in a row? clearly I'm not of this earth.. I walk amongst you, I live amongst you, but by now I look and sound like a PICASO painting set to polka music.. and after the things I have seen and heard this weekend I'm very much surprised my skull hasn't shattered like paper thin porcelain china.. and yet here I am.. squinting into the sun on an unforgiving SUNDAY evening at 7PM in what I hope like hell is the final chapter of my journey.. with a new camera that still works in spite of all the incomprehensible chaos it's captured on it's tiny fragile lens..



first stop, I grab some dinner at AUSSIE PIZZAHOUSE on HINDLEY.. curiously enough with a pizza served up by no other than the former drummer of UNSPOKEN THINGS.. weeeird.. either I'm tripping balls something fierce, or this insane live music shit is starting to follow me everywhere I go now (seriously it's bad enough I get recognised off freaking MYSPACE!) regardless of this all.. my combo 12'' all meat / chicken asparagus pizza serves me well and gives me more than enough vague nutrience and fried ooze to keep me in the game without bursting into flames and collapsing into a foaming puddle of ants anytime too soon.. or at least I don't think that would happen? (checks boxers to see if they're flame retarded :P )



anyhoo, the final destination in the longest journey of my weekend, is JIVE at 7:30PM..



and telling from all the banners plastered to ridiculous overload and covering every available square inch with sponsors, promo and logos tonight.. it appears I've found myself at an MTV event - "KICKSTART YOUR ROCKSTAR CAREER".. which, in as much as you could call this a "battle of the bands" event, if you cut thru the bullshit, it all roughly translates to the live music equivalent of a speed dating event whoring for the affection of a multinational media network with a golden paycheck.. now you may be wondering? why would an otherwise cheesy and commercial event interest someone like me on the tail-end of the apocalypse? well.. not only are the 5 bands featured tonight actually worth their mustard in the live arena.. but since each are limited to a setlist of only 3 songs and are looking to impress, we're set to see some freakingly hilarious overblown rock moves captured for our amusement :)



as befits an event such as this (and quite uncharacteristic of a SUNDAY) the venue is packed to the gills tonight.. I would like to think that all of these people present are the collective rent-a-crowd faithful as gathered by all 5 bands to cheer them on and to serve the cause.. but I can't help but suspect that at least some of these people, especially the more exciteable and frisky grooving to the DJ between songs are merely some of MTV's idiotic cheer squad (they're just a little TOO frisky for a hungover SUNDAY like this to be believable.. but hey, maybe that's just me.. we weren't all near stupid enough to attempt what I did in the last 3 nights, riiiight?)



BLOW UP BETTY
first band off and running at 7:45PM is the ridiculously frenetic all girl punk explosion of BLOW UP BETTY.. shredding out a howling disscord in screaming, gnashing teeth, hammering 2-tone fuzz riffs, spastic drumming and repetive head injury sing along melodies.. quite like if you got THE SPAZZY's vs THE DONNA's in a fuckoff bar brawl of hair pulls and fingernail scratchings (only funky!).. of course, due to the very nature of their 2-minute-noodle songcraft (and admitted by the band themselves) this set is pretty much over even before they've started.. but you still gotta hand it to them tho', even in that short hiccup of time they still managed to blow my eardrums clean out my skull and splattered over the walls.. fuckit, all punk gigs should be like this.. hit n run, bash me over the head with a whisky bottle. and I'm good to go :)









MORALS OF A MINOR
with barely a pause to sneeze and it's MORALS OF A MINOR turn on stage, and as much as I would hate to eat the ever so brilliantly crafted shit-kicking words I spat at them over that DUNGEN gig played many moons ago (read the infamous review here if you want a cheap laugh).. I gotta say, over those last 9 months these dudes have come a freaking LONG way.. this set today - an explosive paisely space-cadet snakehip freakjam of early 80's U2 and INXS mixed with THE POLICE, the vocals stylings of MATT BELLAMY from MUSE and some kinda pagan 60's acid shit you'd expect JIM MORRISON to deflower groupies to.. absolutely blows everything out've the water tonight.. everyone I talk to is pretty much thinking right there and then that these guys will win.. everyone else could go home now.. it's all over.. game over maaan! game over! such is the diabolical fury of this set.. and since it's presented in such condensed form, it effectively cuts out all the slow boring bits that drove me nuts during their BIG DAY OUT set (yup, I just had to taunt you guys at the end didn't I? ;) )









ILLICIT EVE
with barely a moment to turn left and cough, it's now time for ILLICIT EVE to take their turn on the podium.. and as entertaining as it is here to listen to their ever so fluffy pink pastel bubblegum pop harmonies as they're shredded and corrupted and throttled to within an inch of their lives like a satanic sacrificial ritual at a cheerleader pep rally gone horribly wrong.. or like the howling 70's guitar doom of LED ZEPPELIN tearing the SUGARBABES and ALL SAINTS limb by limb in a mashup that'd make those BELGIAN mad scientists 2 MANY DJ's wish they'd thought of it first.. the real entertainment (for us photographers at least) is getting as many silly photos of lead vocalist EMILY SMART looking like a confused goldfish and FLISS FREEMAN going beserk with the fluffy labradoodle as insanely possible in the space of 15 minutes.. (sure, we all like to think this blog is about the music.. but really it's all about me making fun of people) all wacky theatrics aside tho', this still makes for a damn rocking set :)









SPECIAL PATROL
next to the sacrificial altar we have SPECIAL PATROL.. a band that I'm awfully surprised I've never photographed before.. I mean shit, I swear I'd seen them play a few years ago (back in the "dark" ages before I had a camera), I've heard mention of them everywhere from every dickhead and dog, heard them spun into high rotation on TRIPLE J countless times, missed sets by mere minutes as I sprinted from one venue to another in my maddening quest to bag another "trophy head" for my photographic collection, had one particular friend of mine foam on about them at every available opportunity and yet it takes a silly event like this to finally catch them.. still, if there is anyone tonight who could challenge MORALS OF A MINOR for the trophy, it'd be these guys.. cooking up the ever so effortlessly catchy, blissfully hungover scruffy pop-rock that you'd get from cheerful UK gits like GOMEZ or the lighter hazier moments of BLUR, they're speaking volumes to every braindamaged casualty in the crowd tonight (and I'm just about fucked up and damaged enough from my misadventures to be a freaking tuning fork to this shit) sure, it's a little too tweed and hair of the dog to be the full fisted fury you'd think would appeal to these MTV judges tonight.. but damn, for all it's cheerfully cheesy likeable melodies and fuzz, it's still really fucking solid..









MUNCHKIN
and finally, at long last at 9PM, the final act to our firing squad arrives in the form of last minute entry MUNCHKIN, recent replacements for FIRE! SANTA ROSA FIRE! who pulled out at the last minute.. recently back to being a 3 piece again after their new (and now ex) drummer MATT mysteriously went MIA.. and since they're the last band on the bill, you just know they wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of going toe to toe with the flawless attack of SPECIAL PATROL or MORALS OF A MINOR.. and yet don't these plucky little electro-pop midgets give it a red hot go anyway.. tearing up the PA with their spikey metronome beats, electro booty grooves, pogo riffs and bass and lead singer KALIAH in that freakingly hot orange cocktail dress near burning up in a human fireball.. whoaaaaa, you almost forget they're actually playing music as she pulls every smouldering and slinky lounge bar move in the book short of doing a MICHELLE PFEIFFER over the laptop and crooning.. it's probably one of the best performances I've yet seen these dudes play (it appears finishing an album after all these months really agrees with them), but could they possibly hope to pull the ultimate underdog and win a ROCK award as an electronica act tonight? who knows?










and so after MUNCHKIN have cleared off stage, and after about 10-15 minutes of dicking about.. one of the judges (a member of THE LIVING END) makes an appearances at the mic.. makes some jokes about how hard the decision is (although it's probably obvious to most of us that they already decided the winner in the taxi ride over tonight) and then announces that the winner of the $20,000 cash prize, a performance slot at the MTV AMA's and a professionally produced music video clip (or something along those lines) is.. SPECIAL PATROL.. a surprise winner (most of us seriously had MORALS OF A MINOR pegged), highly deserving all the same (after playing countless years on the live circuit it's nice to finally catch a break) but still an interesting choice for a "ROCK" winner, as SPECIAL PATROL rather jokingly play up to in receiving the award.. they really can't quite believe their luck either..



with the ceremony now over at 10PM, the DJ kicking into high gear in and all the MTV cheer squad buring up the dancefloor like there's no tomorroww.. I finally think about throwing my twitching carcass into a nice well cushioned pine box the fuck outta here..



sure, I could've continued the adventure tonight, there was an MTV afterparty kicking on at ZHIVAGO's till the wee hours of the morning that I could've attended (cheers for the invite ILLICIT EVE :) ), but clearly even someone as near insane as myself couldn't possibly push this boulder up that hill any longer.. and so, very much satisfied that I had done more than enough in this weekend to put 3-4 lesser weekends to shame, I sought my bus home for sleep at last.. for surely I'd deserve a grinning coma, a tropical island paradise and a total heart, kidney and liver transplant after what I put myself thru (and lets just forget the next sleepless 24 hours of frenetic activity it's taken for me to process these photos and publish it on the web just so all you monkeys could read it?) and yet also forwarned in the knowledge that this madness all starts anew whether I'm ready or not this COMING weekend.. seriously, why did I ever agree to this crap!!? hahahaha.. if I'm not dead by morning.. kill me now, this shit's gone too far! ;)



and yet, thru all of this.. thru 13 live bands, the asphyxiating stench of the CRANKA dancefloor, SHOTZ at it's most drunken, disorderly and disorienting.. the unholy trinity of full moon, the dawn of the FRINGE and the CLIPSAL 500 all coming to bear.. this gizmo lives thru it all without a scratch..



yup, if ever there was a camera stress test for SPOZ's RANT, this would be it.. the fact that I don't have a pile of crunched up plastic beads, silicon, glass and metal fragments forming a small pyramid in my wastepaper basket means that perhaps there's hope yet for this FRISBEE, and the fact that my freakingly awesome (yet utterly marginal) superpowers came to the fore once more and prevented me from keeling over dead at the end of it is all the more miraculous.. could my camera survive 4 more years of this? could I survive 4 more years of this? who knows? only the next weekend could possibly begin to hope in answering that.. join me if you dare! :)

Previously on Spoz's Rant: Six Million Ways To Die

:: Spoz 11:57 PM |
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