TYGER TYGER + BAKEWELL STREET + THE TRAFALGARS
LIVE @ ROCKET BAR / Thursday January 17th 2008
This is a photo of a drumkit. A photo of a blue drumkit. A photo of a mild mannered blue drumkit gently grazing in thoughtful silence under low lights at Rocket Bar on a lazy Thursday night, placed here to distract you from the glaring fact that I can't think of a fiendishly clever opening gambit for this episode of Spoz's Rant. Seriously, has it come to this? Of all the things I could talk shit on and here I am making fun of a blue drumkit? Fucking hell, nobody deserves this! It's probably got a wife and kids at home: a cowbell, a tambourine and a few ride cymbals trying to make ends meet and here I am poking fun at it? What has this blog come to? Wars, famine, drought, death and disease and here I am writing opening lines about a fucking blue drumkit? Surely I've gone mad. If only it was a red drumkit we wouldn't be in this mess. Still, before I can surepticiously make off with this blue drumkit in effort to swap it for a red one, I'm interrupted by three live bands. Damn, why does that always happen to me!? Oh yeah that's right, I'm running a live music blog, how could I possibly forget? ROCK 'N ROLL!! WOOOO!THE TRAFALGARS
Perhaps you remember a pissy little UK britpop band by the name of Oasis? Big in the mid 90's, kinda shit ever since? Brothers Liam and Noel Gallagher still beating each other stupid with that blunt end of a whisky bottle, drunk in a gutter at 5AM? That same damn song from their first album "Definitely Maybe" played beyond projectile vomiting point on commercial radio? All that bragging that they're bigger than The Beatles? Noel Gallagher still rubbishing fellow UK bands in NME in the mistaken belief people still give a shit? Aaaaah so many memories! Or what about Jet? Everyone loves Jet don't they? They're everyone's favourite Australian rock band! Whoaaa, OK OK! take your finger OFF that trigger and put DOWN that shotgun! *cough* Yeah, beats me why I just mentioned all that? The Trafalgars sound nothing like them! They're nothing but sweet 60's mod guitars, goofy harmonies, catchy britpop hooks and everything you loved about The Beatles before they got into all the LSD, sitars, walruses 'n shit. Fuck yeah!
Wow and who'd think I could last an entire review of The Trafalgars without once making fun of the drummer for looking like Ralph Wiggum from the Simpsons? YEAS!! (oh fuck, nevermind!).BAKEWELL STREET
Despite what you may think, this next band is not named after one of many infamous back alleys from The Crown & Anchor where people periodically duck off to "in search of wookies". They're also not to be confused with fellow Adelaide band Special Patrol (as Miles from Special Patrol frequently wears an entirely different hat). Still, comparisons and confusions are more than understandable as Bakewell Street have been known to cause similar symptoms in their fans: blurring of vision, short term memory loss, uncontrollable fits of laughter, distortions in space and time, slowed reaction times, an increased appreciation in wildlife documentaries, short term memory loss, bloodshot eyes, increased appetite and short term memory loss. Yup, that's Bakewell Street (wait, did i mention short term memory loss?). They're the hearts on your sleeve stoner pub rock cliche everyone loves on a Sunday afternoon: hair of the dog droopy eared and howling on the porch, hunchbacks with acoustic guitars, pint glasses swinging in the air, a chorus of broken yodels as you sing along; yet surprisingly mixed up with a frenetic rhythm section channeling Franz Ferdinand and The Strokes (weird!). Still, as hungover as this all sounds, it is not without it's blissfully easy going charm. Light one up and funk on out yo!TYGER TYGER
In covering this final headlining act for tonight, I believe a public service announcement is in order. Travis Williamson: lead singer of Tyger Tyger, formerly of Adelaide band Unspoken Things, has an ego that must be destroyed. Use all means necessary: small pox, snipers, orbital ICBM platforms, a well placed banana peel into an open sewer, fuckit it doesn't matter. I call upon you my ever faithful audience to get this job done with maximum expediency. For those of you who still doubt, dare I mention: Global warming? Travis' ego. Rising interest rates, petrol prices and plummeting stockmarkets worldwide? Travis' ego. American foreign policy? Travis' ego. Tom Cruise? dwarfed by Travis' ego. The gravitational anomolies in the orbits of Uranus and Neptune as rumoured to be caused by an as yet undiscovered "planet X"? Travis' ego. And for those of you who haven't seen the movie "Cloverfield", I apologise if this is a spoiler, but the monster that destroys New York? yup you guessed it, Travis' ego. That self righteous little c*nt of a crap weasel must die! *cough* still that being said, he sure knows how to front one FUCK of a live band! Not since the wreckage wrought by the combined forces of Central Deli Band, Tony Font Show and No Through Road has an Adelaide band been this damn near life threatening. They're the Arctic Monkeys and The Strokes with a "fuck you" lyrical belligerency, 80's band Wall Of Voodoo, Dave Graney 'N The Coral Snakes and a seriously confused Latin swing. Yup, as much as it pains me to inflate Travis' ego even more than it already is, this may very well be THE Adelaide band to assemble a lynch mob against in 2008. You have been warned!
And that's my Thursday night done and dusted. Of course I could go on to explain the deeper meaning behind why I chose those blue drums as my opening image (instead of simply targeting that same old desk lamp by the front bar for the six billionth time) but lets face it, nothing about me drinking myself retarded till 3AM on a Thursday night in January ever makes a lick of sense (and I don't doubt we must be all feeling infinitely richer because of it.. woooooo!).
Previously on Spoz's Rant: The Devilrock Four + Booster + Steel Tiger