TAUGHT BY ANIMALS + DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA
LIVE @ THE GRACE EMILY / Friday August 31st 2007
LIVE @ FAD CAFE / Saturday September 1st 2007
It has become a well established fact here on SPOZ's RANT that I am in possession of freakingly awesome yet entirely marginal super human powers. Sure they're not really useful for society at large; they don't save lives, they don't allow me to leap tall buildings in a single bound, they don't let me outrun bullets, nor will they ever prove to be the cornerstone for a ridiculously successful film or television franchise but for the sake of this laughable excuse for a blog they're damn near essential. How else could I possibly explain my bullet proof liver? my ability to survive weeks on end without sleep? my uncanny knack for writing line upon line of aimless twaddle without a single hint of punctuation? or how I could be standing here at The Grace Emily and also be at Rocket Bar catching Former Child Stars and The City Riots all on the SAME night!? Woweeee!! how I'm not crushing this arseclown of a city under my iron fist right now is anyone's guess!?
Of course there's any number of valid reasons for why I'm really in two places at once this night. Most I've clearly since forgotten. So with no better means to explain myself out of this hole (or segwey into the next bit of my blog without appearing brain damaged) here's some entirely random hamster shots of guitar pedals, synths, drums and guitars to entertain you with..
hey look kids, it's a sparkly reindeer sticker! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! :)TAUGHT BY ANIMALS
A coincidence that brings me here just in time for a late night experimental jazz set by Delusions Of Grandma. Imagine a blender. Imagine an oversized blender. Imagine an oversized blender large enough to throw a herd of elephants into. Throw in Primus, Red Snapper, 80's Pink Floyd, The Chemical Brothers and Coltrane and then an entire herd of elephants. Drop 2 tabs of acid. Wash it down with 2 bottles of red wine. Now switch it on the blender. Watch as all 4 corners of the room get coated by the blast. Suddenly remember that you forgot to put the lid on. Refrain the urge to lick the walls. Now imagine all that mess being scraped off those walls, collected into buckets, seasoned to taste and delivered to a high class restaurant. Imagine it being prepared by a world class chef. Imagine it serving 4-6 people. Imagine 5 of those people dying from food poisoning. That is Delusions of Grandma: the flavours, the sounds, the face melting psychedelic shitstorm and all the headspins in between. More accurately they could easily be renamed as Creutzfeldt-Jakob and act as soundtrack to one of those freaky late night foreign movies on SBS with the puppets and the full frontal nudity, either way I'm frightened.. eeeeeeee!
So it's just as well they provide intermission with this band otherwise I'd be experiencing the closing scenes of 2001 Space Odyssey right about now. Breathe. Take a moment to recollect my scattered thoughts sent scurrying like rats into the cracks in the walls..
before pissing the last of my mind away when I make the foolish mistake of heading upstairs to experience THIS fuckoff bizarre art exhibition..
The exact identity of the artist is unknown (gee.. guess who forgot to look it up on the night?) but from the looks of the extensive collection found both upstairs and downstairs and the newly painted walls and ceilings to accompany it, it appears they're a popular one..
The theme (as much as my sleep deprived brain can handle right now) appears to be an extreme mashup between 1940's pinup girl, WW2 propaganda, the cult of celebrity, capitalist greed, soft porn, Frida Kahlo, Andy Warhol and what happens if you accidently break the "saturation" knob on your television set (oh, and bonus points too if you happen to find the subliminal "penis" shot in one of the background paintings from the Delusions of Grandma set weeeeee!). Yup this shit sure ain't for the squeamish and it'd take a truly insane person to want to hang THESE up in their house, but still you gotta appreciate the insane humour of it all :)
With my audiovisual senses effectively violated from all angles it's now back downstairs for Delusions of Grandma's second set: featuring leisurely light noodling honkytonk piano, a tripped out drum n bass jam somewhat reminiscent of LTJ Bukem, a tagteam jam with those mini keyboarded mouth organs thingies (that seem to be all the rage these days) and all the wall licking extremes in between. Yup all in all, this would hafta be one of the coolest things I've seen in FAD since Artax Mission blew the roof off this crap-shack back in April
.. nice one! :)
With their last set closing at 2AM and with the venue rapidly emptying out into the night, I could've continued this mad journey like I always do on a Saturday night: onward and eastward to familiar oblivion as found amongst the baboons at my usual haunts: The Cranka and Shotz..
but instead I went home.
"WTF 2AM!? home already!? duuuuude you've changed maaan, you used to be cool!"
Yeah, I know.. I readily admit it's harder to live up to my own insane standards now that I'm running the hamster wheels like the rest of you. It sure as fuck kills me to write this blog non-stop every weeknight to keep up the pace and I've barely had an hour's break since a month ago when I chose this mess in the first place. So what now? Surely this is the end riiight? Surely it's all over? Surely I've capitulated? Surely I've raised that little white flag, bowed down and admitted a crushing defeat to the 9 to 5? Oooooh no kiddies, you ain't seen nothing yet!
This weekend is FAR from over..
Previously on Spoz's Rant: The City Riots + Former Child Stars