:: SPOZ's RANT ::

The Adelaide music scene: to many of you it might be little more than a touring speed bump between Melbourne and Perth but to us it's a way of life. Feast within, on all its dysfunctioning splendour, as we bring you the highly satirical, laughingly fictional and intellectually imbecile tales from our rock & roll wasteland...
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[::..latest blogs..::]
:: SUBMERGE, DOUBLE
DENIM and TIERSMAN
(Fringe Festival)
:: TORTE E MORT
(Fringe Festival)
:: THE BYZANTINES
(EP Launch) with
COSMO THUNDERCAT
(Fringe Festival)
:: BLACK CORAL, SONS
OF ZOKU, THE HOWLING
FOG, BLOOD PLASTIC
and KITCHEN WITCH
(Fringe Festival)
:: MOTHER'S CAKE,
ALITHIA, TONY
FONT SHOW and
OVERVIEW EFFECT
:: HALL OF FAME ::
:: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES** :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ARTAX MISSION :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND* :: BOOSTER :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CIRCLE CLAN :: COERCE :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: CONCHILLIA :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: DOUBLE HANDED* :: THE DUNES :: EGYPT :: ENCARTA / COLONEL KERNEL** :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA FIRE!*** :: FRIENDS :: GLASS SKIES :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT* :: THE HONEY PIES** :: HORROR MY FRIEND* :: ISLE OF VISION :: JUNGLE CITY :: KAMIKAZE :: THE KEEPSAKES* :: THE KILLGIRLS*** :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: LADY STRANGELOVE** :: LEADER CHEETAH* :: LIKE LEAVES** :: LUMONICS* :: LYLA :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS*** :: MERE THEORY :: MORALS OF A MINOR* :: THE MOTIVE :: MR WEDNESDAY** :: NO THROUGH ROAD*** :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! :: REALIST FEW :: RIDE INTO THE SUN** :: THE SEA THIEVES* :: THE SHINY BRIGHTS* :: SINCERELY, GRIZZLY*** :: SKELETONS :: SOFT WHITE MACHINE* :: SONS OF ZOKU :: SPARKSPITTER* :: SQUEAKER :: ST. MORRIS SINNERS :: STEERING BY STARS* :: SWIMMING :: TEA :: THE TIMBERS :: TONY FONT SHOW** :: TRACER :: THE TRANSATLANTICS** :: TWO SUNS :: TYGER TYGER* :: THE VILLENETTES* :: WEST THEBARTON BROTHEL PARTY :: WOLF & CUB** :: ZETA ::
[::..rant awards..::]
:: 2008 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2009 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2010 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
::
2011 - 1 | 2 | 3 ::
:: RECOMMENDED ::
[::..global..::]
:: NME
:: SPIN
[::..local..::]
[::..blogosphere..::]
[::..miscellaneous..::]
:: XKCD
:: SITE FEATURES ::
[::..video blogs..::]
[::..festival blogs..::]
:: Fringe Festival 2012
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2013
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |
11 | 12 | 13 | 14
:: Fringe Festival 2015
- 1 | 2
| 3 | 4 |
5
| 6 | 7 | 8
[::..b&w episodes..::]
:: A Winter Wonderland
- 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
:: In Limbo - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7
:: B&W July 2012 - 1 | 2 |
3
| 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8
[::..special features..::]
:: ARTIST INDEX ::
:: !!! :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES :: 20TH CENTURY GRADUATES (DUET) :: 200 MOTELS :: 4 KINGS LOUD :: 4 VOICE :: 67 SPECIAL :: 78 SAAB :: A.B. ORIGINAL :: A BASKET OF MAMMOTHS ::A.D.K.O.B. :: A RED DAWN :: AARON THOMAS :: ABBEY HOWLETT :: ABBEY HOWLETT & THE GOLDEN REALM :: ABLACKWELL :: ACID MOUNTAIN :: ACROSS THE ATLAS :: ADALITA :: ADAM PAGE :: ADELAIDE'S PIPE GUY :: ADNAAN BARAKY :: ADRIAN BELEW :: ADRIAN DEUTSCH :: AFFAIRS OF MEN :: AFI :: AFTER THE FALL :: AIRBOURNE :: ALANA JAGT :: ALARM BIRDS & THE SEA THIEVES :: ALIAS & THE JAMS :: ALITHIA :: ALL FLIGHT CREW ARE DEAD :: ALL MADE OF RUBIES :: ALL NIGHT GIRLS :: ALMA KALORAMA :: ALPEN :: ALPHA BETA FOX :: ALPHABETTE :: ALPINE :: ALUKA :: AMBUSH MARKETING :: THE AMCATS :: AMUNDSENS FLAG :: ANDREW HIGGS & THE SAND CASTLE HARUM :: ANDREW P. STREET :: ANDY BULL :: ANDY ROBERTS :: ANGEL & THE BADMAN :: ANGEL EYES :: ANGEL OLSEN :: ANGELIK :: ANGELS OF GUNG-HO :: ANGIE HART :: ANIMAL SHADOWS :: ANIMAL TRAPS :: ANNIE BASS :: ANNIE SIEGMANN :: ANNY DUFF :: ANTHONY ANT :: ANTHONY WIGNALL :: ANTONY OF THE FUTURE :: ANYA ANASTASIA :: ANYA ANASTASIA & THE BIRD WIZDOM CABARET :: ANYA MCNICOL-WINDRAM :: THE APE :: APHELION :: APPOMATTOX RUN :: ARAKEYE :: THE ARCADE FIRE :: ARCHERS :: ARCHIE :: ARCHITECTURE IN HELSINKI :: ARGUS & THE LIAR :: ARIEL PINK'S HAUNTED GRAFFITI :: ARLO COOK :: ARMOUR FOU :: ARRAY :: ART OF ESCAPE :: THE ART OF FLYING KITES :: ARTAX MISSION :: AS THE PENNY DROPS :: THE ASTEROID BELT :: THE ATLANTIC STREET BAND :: ATLASIS & AMICA :: AUBERON DANCE ACADEMY :: AUDIUM :: THE AUDREYS :: AUGUSTE :: AURA FORM :: AURORA :: THE AUTHENTIC REPLICAS :: AUXILLA :: AVANT GARDENERS :: THE AVES :: AVIATOR LANE :: AWKWARD LOVE TRIANGLE :: BABES ARE WOLVES :: BABYLON BURNING :: BAD//DREEMS :: BACHELOR OF ARTS :: BACHELORETTE :: BACK$EAT ROMEOS :: THE BAKER SUITE :: THE BAKER'S DIGEST :: BAKEWELL STREET :: BALL PARK MUSIC :: BANG! BANG! AIDS! :: BANJO JACKSON :: BANJO WEATHERALD :: BANOFFEE :: BARCODE :: THE BARON :: THE BARONS OF TANG :: BASEBALL :: THE BASKERVILLES :: BASTARD SONS OF RUINATION :: BAT FOR LASHES :: BATPISS :: BATRIDER :: THE BATTERY KIDS :: BATTLEHOUNDS :: BATTLE POPE :: BATTLES :: BEACH HOUSE :: BEANIE MY FRIEND :: BEARDED GYPSY BAND :: THE BEARDS :: THE BEASTIE BOYS :: BED WETTER :: BEDHEAD :: THE BEDROOM PHILOSOPHER & HIS AWKWARDSTRA :: THE BEERBELLY BUSKERS :: BEFORE THE AFTERMATH :: BELITTLE LEAGUE :: THE BELLE CURVE :: THE BELLRAYS :: BELOVED ELK :: BEN GEL & THE BONEYARD SAINTS :: BEN ELY'S RADIO 5 :: BEN REVI :: BEN REVI ALL-STAR REVIVAL BAND :: BETTY AIRS :: BIG BAD BARRY & THE DEAD SETS :: BIG DADDY'S DISCOTHEQUE :: BIG RICHARD INSECT :: BIG SCARY :: BIG SKY THEORY :: BIG YAWN :: BILLY BISHOP GOES TO WAR :: BILLY BOB'S BBQ JAM BAND :: BING GOES TO MONACO :: BINKY & THE BUNG MICS :: THE BIRD :: BIRD WIZDOM :: BIRTHGLOW :: BIT BY BATS :: BITCH PREFECT :: THE BITTER DARLINGS :: BITTER SWEET KICKS :: BJORK :: BLACK GOLD :: BLACK LIPS :: BLACKCHORDS :: THE BLACK AND WHITE :: BLACK CORAL :: THE BLACK DOVES :: BLACK KNIGHT :: BLAKE SABAN 3 :: BLAST RHOMBUS :: BLEEDING KNEES CLUB :: THESE BLESSED BONES :: THE BLIND HERD :: BLISTERED PALMS :: BLOOD PLASTIC :: BLOODHOUNDS ON MY TRAIL :: BLOW UP BETTY :: THE BLUEBERRIES :: BLUEJUICE :: BLUSH RESPONSE :: BOB DOWNE :: BOB LOG III :: BODY HORROR :: BOHOEFFER :: THE BON SCOTTS :: BOOSTER :: THE BORDERLAND :: BOS :: THE BOTTLEROCKETS :: BOX ELDER :: THE BOX ROCKETS :: THE BRIAN JONESTOWN MASSACRE :: BRENDAWG & THE DROID :: BRIANNA MAHONEY :: BRIARS :: BRILLIG :: BRITISH INDIA :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS :: THE BRITISH ROBOTS (DUO) :: BRONZE CHARIOT :: BROKEN SOCIAL SCENE :: BROKERS :: BROTHERSISTER :: THE BROUHAHA :: BRUNATEX :: BUFFALO BOYFRIEND :: THE BUMBLEBEEZ :: BURAKA SOM SISTEMA :: BURIED FEATHER :: BURLESQUE BEAUTIES :: BURN THE ASHES :: THE BURNING SEA :: BURNING TOWER :: BURNSIDE MUMS :: BUSHIDO :: BUSTER FIDEZ :: BYE BYE MOUNTAIN :: THE BYZANTINES :: CABBAGE & KINGS :: CABIN CULTS :: CAL WILLIAMS JNR :: CALIFORNIA COUSIN :: CALLERDENIGHT :: CALLING ALL CARS :: CAM GOODALL :: CAMEROM MCTERNAN :: CAMP COPE :: CANDIDA :: CANIDAE :: CANIS VULPES :: CAPTAIN CLEANOFF :: CAPTAIN HELLFIRE & THE WRETCHED BRETHREN :: THE CAPTAINS OF INDUSTRY :: CAPTIVES :: CAR SEAT HEADREST :: CARLA LIPPIS & THE MARTIAL HEARTS :: THE CASIO BROTHERS :: CASKET CASE :: CASS McCOMBS :: CASSETTE KIDS :: CAT DOG BIRD :: CAT PARTY :: CENTAURZ :: CENTRAL DELI BAND :: CERES :: CESARE :: CHAPMAN STREET :: CHARLIE MONSOON :: CHASING PHOENIX :: CHEER ADVISORY COUNCIL :: CHERRY GRIND :: THE CHEVRON WHORES :: CHÉRIE DE KLERK :: CHILD :: CHILDREN COLLIDE :: CHRIS FINNEN :: CHORAL GRIEF :: CHVRCHES :: CIARAM GRANGER :: CIRCLE CLAN :: CIRCUS ARCADE :: THE CITRADELS :: CITRUS JAM :: CITY CALM DOWN :: CITY RIOTS :: CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH :: THE CLIQUE :: CLOUD CONTROL :: CLOUD NOTHINGS :: THE CLOWNS OF DECADENCE :: CLUE TO KALO :: COBRA :: COCK :: COERCE :: COG :: COLLARBONES :: COLLIDE/ESCAPE :: COLLIDER :: COLONEL KERNEL :: COLORBLIND :: COLOURISE :: CONCHILLIA :: CONSOLE WARRIORS :: COOKIE BAKER :: COOKIE BAKER & HER SPECIAL SECRET SPELLS :: COOL JUMPER :: COOL JUMPER & TANTIVY FAIR :: COOPS & THE BIRD :: CORPUS :: CORTEZ :: COSMO BLACK :: COSMO THUNDERCAT :: COSMO THUNDERCAT (DUO) :: COUNTERFEIT TRAITOR :: COY CARP :: CRACKWHORE :: THE CRAYON FIELDS :: CREEPERS :: CRUSTY SUITCASE BAND :: THE CRYING GAME :: CUB SCOUTS :: CURSES :: CUT COPY :: CUT OFF YOUR HANDS :: THE DAIRY BROTHERS :: DAISY BUCHANAN :: DAIYE SPA :: DALLAS FRASCA :: DALLI :: DAMN ARMS :: DAMN TERRAN :: DAMNED MEN :: DAMO SUZUKI NETWORK :: DAN DEVLIN :: DANCE TIL YOU CAN'T SAY YEAH! :: DANGER & PLASTIC :: DANGEROUS! :: DANIEL VARRICCHIO :: DANIELE VILELLA :: DANVERS :: DANVERS & GHOST KNIFE :: DAPPLED CITIES :: THE DARDANELLES :: THE DARK LIGHTS :: DAS UBBERDUNG :: DAVE PHILLIPS :: DAY RAVIES :: DAYDREAM :: THE DAYLIGHT BRAVES :: DAYSWORTH FIGHTING :: THE DEAD BELLS :: DEAD END FRIENDS :: DEAD FRENCHMEN :: DEAD JOE :: DEAD POPES OF THE VATICAN :: DEADLY ARE THE NAKED :: DEAFAULT :: DEAR PLASTIC :: DEEP SEA ARCADE :: THE DEER JOHNS :: DEERHUNTER :: DEJA :: DEJA ENTENDU :: DELIA OBST :: THE DELTA RIGGS :: DELUSIONS OF GRANDMA :: DESCRIBE ELIZA :: DESERT CROOKS :: A DEVIL AMONGST THE TAILORS :: THE DEVILROCK FOUR :: DEXTER JONES :: DIAMOND SINS :: DIANA SCALZI :: DICK DIVER :: DIE! DIE! DIE! :: DIESEL WITCH :: DIIV :: DIPLOMAT :: DIPSTONE :: DIRT PLAYGROUND :: THE DIRTY MONKS :: DIRTY WOLVES :: THE DIVINE FLUXUS :: DIZZEE RASCAL :: DJ KELE OKEREKE :: DJ SHADOW :: DJ SPOZ :: DJANGO ROWE TRIO :: DMA'S :: DOE :: DON MORRISON :: DONNARUMMA :: DOUBLE DENIM :: DOUBLE DRAGON :: DOUBLE HANDED :: DOZERS :: DRAWN FROM BEES :: THE DREAMBOATS :: DRILLER JET ARMSTRONG :: THE DRONES :: DROPLET :: DRUID FLUIDS :: DRUNK MUMS :: DUD PILLS :: DUKES OF WINDSOR :: DUMB EARTH :: DUNE RATS :: THE DUNES :: DUNGEN :: DUSTY LEE :: DUSTY LEE & THE ANGELS OF GUNG HO :: DUSTY LEE'S WASTED WANDERERS :: DZ :: DZ DEATHRAYS :: EAST END VILLAINS :: ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN :: ECHO & THE EMPRESS :: EDDY CURRENT SUPPRESSION RING :: EGYPT :: THE EL CAMINOS :: ELECTRIC WIDOWS :: THE ELEVENTH HOUR :: THE E.L.F. :: EL-P :: ELECTRIC EXILES :: ELEPHANT :: ELLEN KIBBLE :: ELVIS :: EMDEE :: EMERGENCY RULE :: EMILY DAVIS :: EMPERORS :: EMMA HORWOOD :: EMPIRE VAGABOND :: ENCARTA :: ENDLESS NAMELESS :: ENEMY OF :: ENNIS TOLA :: ENVY STREET :: ES IST SUPER :: EVEN :: EXPATRIATE :: THE EXPLODERS :: EXPLODING PLASTIC INEVITABLE :: EZRA HOPE :: FACEMEAT :: FAITH NO MORE :: FAIR MAIDEN :: THE FAK :: FAKE LAKE :: FAKE TAN :: FASCINATOR :: THE FAT SACK :: FAT TAILED ANTICHINUS :: FAVOUR THE BRAVE :: FEAR AND LOATHING :: THE FEARLESS VAMPIRE KILLERS :: FEIST :: FEMME FATALES :: FERGUS O'REGAN :: FEZ FAANANA :: FIGHTERPILOT :: A FILM FOR THE FUTURE :: FILTHY LUCRE :: THE FINISHING SCHOOL :: FINNEN & DAVIDSON :: THE FINNS :: FIRS :: FISHING WITH HENRY :: FIRE! SANTA ROSA, FIRE! :: FIST PUMP, FIST BUMP :: FISTFUL OF TROJANS :: FLEUR GREEN :: FKA TWIGS :: THE FLEEING MINDS :: THE FLOORS :: FLORENCE & THE MACHINE :: FLUME :: THE FOLKO-OH-NOES :: FONT PLAYS FONT :: FORCES :: FOREIGN/NATIONAL :: FOREST OF GNOMES :: FORMER CHILD STARS :: FOX FAEHRMANN :: FOXX ON FIRE :: FRANZ FERDINAND :: FRAUD MILLIONAIRES :: FREESTATE :: FRESH KILLS :: FRIDAY'S FOX :: FRIENDS :: FROM THE DEAD SEA :: FULL CONTACT SAFARI :: THE FUMES :: FUNK LATIN UNION :: FUNKOARS :: FUTURE FARM :: FUTURE ISLANDS :: THE FYOOGS :: GALAPAGOOSE :: GALAXY CAT :: GALLEON :: GAVIN DE ALMEIDA :: GAY PARIS :: THE GELS :: GEMINI DOWNS :: GENERATION SWINE :: GEORDIE LITTLE :: GERMEIN SISTERS :: GG ALAN BINDIG :: GHOST WALK :: GHOUL :: GHYTI :: GHYTI (DUO) :: GHYTI & THE PHILANTHROPIC ORCHESTRA :: GINFOX VS HELLO NEWMAN :: GIRL TALK :: THE GIVEAWAYS :: GLASS :: GLASS DUNES :: GLASS SKIES :: GLASS TOWERS :: GLISK :: GNARLS BARKLEY :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT :: GOD GOD DAMMIT DAMMIT (Lounge Set) :: GOLD BLOOM :: THE GOOD CHINA :: GOOD BOY :: GOON WIZARRD :: GOTYE :: GRACE GOODFELLOW :: GRAFTON PRIMARY :: THE GRAND RAPIDS :: THE GRATES :: GRAVEYARD TRAIN :: THE GREETING METHOD :: GRENADIERS :: GREY DATURAS :: GRIMES :: GRIMEY :: GROOVE ARMADA :: GROUND COMPONENTS :: THE GROWL :: GUILLAUME SOLO ACOUSTIC :: GUINEAFOWL :: GUN IT :: GÜNTER & THE SAFEWORD :: GYRO :: HAIM :: HAL BIRD :: HALCYON DRIVE :: HALFWAY TO FORTH :: THE HAPPY ENDINGS :: HAPPY SOMETIMES :: HAR MAR SUPERSTAR :: THE HARD ACHES :: HARMLESS HUNTER :: HARMONY :: HARRY FREEMAN :: HARTS :: HAWKS OF ALBA :: HAYSTACKS CALHOON :: HEATH WEBER :: HEKYL :: HELLO, LOVER :: HELLO NEWMAN :: HELMET :: HESTON DROP :: HEY FEVER :: HEY LADY! :: HI, I'M RECLUSIVE AUTHOR THOMAS PYNCHON :: HIGH STAKES :: HIGH TENSION :: HIGH VIOLET :: HIGHTIME :: HILLS & TRAINS :: HIT THE JACKPOT :: THE HOLD STEADY :: THE HOLIDAYS :: HOLOGRAPHIC CHARIZARD :: HOLOGRAPHIC COLTS :: HOLY FUCK :: HOLY HOLY :: THE HOLY SEA :: HOLY SERPENT :: HOME FOR THE DEF :: THE HONEY PIES :: HORROR MY FRIEND :: HOSPITAL THE MUSICAL :: HOT WINGS :: HOUSE OF JADE :: HOWL AT THE MOON :: HOWL 'N BONES :: HOWLING BELLS :: THE HOWLING FOG :: HUMBLE BEE :: HUMMINGBIRD :: HUNGRY KIDS OF HUNGARY :: THE HUNTED CROWS :: HURRICANE JANE :: HURRICANES :: THE HUSHES :: HUXLEY :: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT WEEZER :: I HEART HIROSHIMA :: I, A MAN :: ICE ON MERCURY :: ID :: IGGY POP & THE STOOGES :: IIAH :: ILLICIT EVE :: IMMIGRANT UNION :: IMOGEN BRAVE :: IMPARTIAL :: THE IMPOSSIBLE QUICHE :: THE INCHES :: INDIAGO :: INSTITUT POLAIRE :: INTERCOOLER :: INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF MOJO :: THE INTERNET :: INTERPOL :: INTERZONE EXPRESS :: INTROVERT :: INUETTE :: INWOODS :: IRAAN SANADZADEH :: IRIDIUM :: IRIE KNIGHTS :: THE IRRESPONSIBLES :: ISLE OF CAPRI :: ISLE OF VISION :: IT'S A HOAX :: IT'S A HOAX (INSTRUMENTAL) :: IT'S WARSAW :: IVORY :: J-LO BIAFRA :: J-WAH :: JACK LONDON :: JACKSON FIREBIRD :: JAMES PARRY :: JANE'S ADDICTION :: JAPAM :: JAPANDROIDS :: JAPANTHER :: JARVIS :: JARVIS COCKER :: JASON SIMON (DEAD MEADOW) :: JAY WALKER AND THE PEDESTRIANS :: JAYNE-ANNE POWER :: JEFF MARTIN & TEREPAI RICHMOND :: JESS KENT :: JESS PORTER :: JESSE DAVIDSON :: JESSE FRANCIS :: JESUS CHRIST POSSE :: THE JEZABELS :: JIKA :: JIMMY & THE MIRRORS :: JIMMY EAT WORLD :: JIMMY MARIN :: JIMMY MOUNTAIN :: JOE MCKEE :: JOEL STERN :: JOEL STERN, CURED PINK & TIMOTHY TATE :: THE JOHN STEEL SINGERS :: JON ADDAMS :: JON MARCO :: JON MORTIMER :: JONNY BLIZZARD :: JORDAN TITO :: JOSH CALLIGEROS :: JOURNEY WELL SPACE WIZARD :: JOY & SPARKS :: JP COE & THE DELEGATES :: JUDGE MENTAL :: JUMP! YOU REVOLUTIONARY :: JUNGLE CITY :: JUNGLEMIRE :: JUPITER :: JUPITER (DUO) :: JUPITER LEAD :: KAB SAVVY :: KAHL WALLIS :: KAMIKAZE :: KAMIKAZE TRIO :: KANGAROO SKULL :: KARL MELVIN :: KASABIAN :: KASAVETT :: KATE VIGO & THE UNDERGROUND ORCHESTRA :: KAURNA CRONIN :: KAZKARIV :: THE KEEPSAKES :: KELLIE LLOYD :: KELLY MENHENNETT :: KELSHY :: THE KEMP BROTHERS :: KHAN :: KID SAM :: KIDS IN CULTS :: KIDS WITH TEETH :: KIKUYU :: THE KILL DEVIL HILLS :: KILLER BIRDS :: THE KILLBOT FACTORY :: THE KILLGIRLS :: KING DADDY :: KING GIZZARD & THE LIZARD WIZARD :: KING KRILL :: KING KRULE :: KING OF THE NORTH :: KINGSTON DOWNES :: KINGSWOOD :: KINS :: KIRK SPECIAL :: KIRK WATT :: KITCHEN WITCH :: KITTEN KONG :: KITTYHAWK :: KOI CHILD :: KORAL :: KORAL & THE GOODBYE HORSES :: KRIS WANDERS :: KRISTINA MILTIADOU :: KURT VILE :: KYLIE BRICE TRIO :: KYRI :: KYTES OF OMAR :: LA FEMME LE FEVER :: LADY GUNG-HO & THE ANGELS OF STRANGELOVE :: LADY STRANGELOVE :: THE LADYBEATLES :: LADYHAWKE :: LAHARA :: LANCE LAZER & TALIBAND :: LARSEN :: LAST DAYS OF KALI :: LAST DINOSAURS :: THE LAST SUPPER :: LATE NIGHT MATINEE :: LATER THAT NIGHT :: LAURA HILL :: LAURA IMBRUGLIA :: LAW & DISORDER :: LAZARO'S DOG :: LC3'S :: LEADER CHEETAH :: LEFT :: LEGENDS OF MOTORSPORT :: LEIGHSTARDUST :: THE LEITMOTIF :: LEITMOTIV LIMBO :: LE GATEAU CHOCOLAT :: LEMURIAN :: LENIN MCCARTHY :: LEO :: LEAPING FELIX :: LES SAVY FAV :: THE LEVITATORS :: LIFE IN LETTERS :: LIGHTS :: LIKE KITES :: LIKE LEAVES :: LIL VALENTINE :: LILY MOJITO :: LILLY SIM :: LILLYS RADIO :: LINE HONOURS :: LIPSMACK :: LITTLE BRIDGET :: LITTLE CAPTAIN :: LITTLE DRAGON :: LITTLE ICE AGE :: LITTLE PRINCE :: LITTLE TWO EYES :: THE LIZARDS :: LO! :: LOADED LEOPARD :: LOCAL REVOLUTION :: LOEMAX :: THE LONDON ROAD POETS :: THE LONELINESS OF A MIDDLE DISTANCE RUNNER :: LONELY FIRE :: LONG WALK HOME :: LONI RAE :: LOON LAKE :: LORDE :: LOST COSMONAUT :: THE LOST SHOW :: LOST VALENTINOS :: LOST WOODS :: LOUIS DONNARUMMA :: LOUISE ADAMS :: LOUISE & THE TORNADOS :: LOUISE ADAMS & THE FRINGE DWELLERS :: LOVE CREAM :: THE LOVE JUNKIES :: LOVE OF DIAGRAMS :: LOVE STEREO :: LOVE ZOMBIES :: THE LUCKSMITHS :: LUKE ASHBY BAND :: LUKE CARLINO :: LUKE DUX :: LUKE ESCOMBE :: LUKE EYGENRAAM :: LUKE GOLDING :: THE LUKE LOUIE TRIO :: LUMONICS :: LYLA :: MAC DEMARCO :: MACH PELICAN :: MACKENZIE :: MAD SHAPES :: MADCLASSIC :: MAGGIE & LOUIS :: MAGIC BONES :: THE MAGNETS :: MAKING :: MAMMAL :: MAMMOTH :: MAMMOTH LOGIC :: MANE :: MANI NEUMEIER & THE BITCHES OF ZEUS :: MANOR :: MARCUS COROWA :: MARK CURTIS BAND :: MARCUS WARNECKE & SAM PORTER :: MARDEN :: MARGARET LLOYD & SEB TONKIN :: MARK CURTIS :: MARLA SINGER :: MARY TREMBLES :: MARY WEBB :: MASSIVE :: MASTER'S CURIOUS DELIRIUM :: MATHEMATIC :: MATHIEU WERCHOWSKI :: MATT BANHAM :: MATTHEW BARLOW :: MATT HAYWARD :: MATTHEW MILES :: MAX SAVAGE :: MAX SAVAGE & THE FALSE IDOLS :: MAYDAY FAIR :: MAYFIELD :: MCKISKO :: MEAKE :: MEANWELL COLLEGE :: THE MEDICS :: MEGAFAUNA :: MENAGERIE :: MERCY ARMS :: MERE THEORY :: THE MESS HALL :: MESSRS :: METHYL ETHEL :: METZ :: MEZZANINE :: MICHAEL STOWERS :: MICK ARMSTRONG, ANDY ARMSTRONG & STAN BASTIRAS :: THE MIDDLE EAST :: MIDNIGHT JUGGERNAUTS :: THE MILTON EXPERIENCE :: MIKE MCKEON :: MIKE RADZEVICIUS :: MIKE TILBROOK :: MIKEY (EX ARTAX MISSION) :: MINDSHOWER :: MIO :: MIRRORLINE :: THE MISCHIEF :: MISCHIEF THE CAT :: MISS GOLLY GOSH :: MISS RENEE SIMONE :: THE MISSION IN MOTION :: MM9 :: MOGERLAINE :: THE MOLTING VULTURES :: MOMOKO SODA :: MONA LISA OVERDRIVE :: MONDO PHASE BAND :: MONEY FOR ROPE :: THE MONIKERS :: MONKEY PUZZLE TREE :: THE MONSTER SOCIETY OF EVIL :: MOODY BELLES :: MOONFAKER :: MOONHUNTER :: MORALS OF A MINOR :: THE MORNING AFTER GIRLS :: MOTHER'S CAKE :: THE MOTHERFUCKING MOTHERFUCKERS :: MOTHERSLUG :: THE MOTIVE :: MOTOWN CONNECTION :: MOUNTAIN STATIC :: MOUNTAIN STRANGER :: MOUNTAINS IN THE SKY :: MOUNTBATTEN :: MOURGOS GRUND :: THE MOURNING SONS :: MOVE TO STRIKE :: MOVIN' MELVIN BROWN :: MR ROSEWATER :: MR WEDNESDAY :: MUM'S TENNIS FRIENDS :: MUMFORD & SONS :: MUNCHKIN :: MUSCLE CAR VS HIGH STAKES :: MUSTERED COURAGE :: MUTEMATH :: MY DISCO :: MY SISTER THE COP :: MYLES MAYO :: N.A.S.A. :: NAKATOMI :: NAOMI KEYTE :: NAOMI KEYTE & TANNON KEW :: NATHAN KAYE :: NAZZ AND THE RED PONIES :: NEO FIX :: NEOHIP :: NEON BOGART :: NEON ELECTRIC :: NEREEDA :: NERVOUS GERBAL :: THE NEW CABAL :: NEW PANTS :: NEW POLLUTANTS :: NEW TRANSLATION :: NICK MURPHY :: THE NEW VAGUE :: NEW WHITE SNEAKERS :: NEW YORK DOLLS :: NEWTONHEATH :: NICHOLAS ALLBROOK :: NICKER TEENS :: NIGEL KOOP & STEVIE BEE :: NIKAI :: NIKKO :: NIKKO & SNOOKS :: NITIDUS :: NO BIRDS :: NO THROUGH ROAD :: NO ZU :: NOBODY KNEW THEY WERE ROBOTS :: THE NOVOCAINES :: NUVO :: THE NYMPHS :: O' LITTLE SISTER :: THE OCEAN PARTY :: OCEANICS :: ODYSSEY :: THE OFFCUTS :: OH MERCY :: OH MINOR :: OH MY GUARD! :: OISIMA :: OKKERVIL RIVER :: OLD MATE :: OLIVERS ARMY :: OLLIE ENGLISH :: OLLY HOLMES :: ONE THOUSAND COUPLES :: ONION :: ONLY OBJECTS :: ONNIE ART :: THE ORBWEAVERS :: ORELIA :: THE OSCILLATORS :: OSH10 :: OVERVIEW EFFECT :: OWLS OF THE SWAMP :: PABLO LIBIDO & THE WHITE ROBOTS :: PAIGE RENEE COURT :: PALACE OF THE KING :: PALEFACE :: THE PANDA BAND :: PANOPTIQUE ELECTRICAL :: PAPA VS PRETTY :: PAPER ARMS :: THE PAPER SCISSORS :: PARADES :: PARTY :: PATRIARCHAL DEATH MACHINE :: PATRICK SARACINO :: PEACHES & HERM :: PEABODY :: PENELOPE SUICIDE :: PENNY IKINGER :: PERFECT PUSSY :: PERSIA & THE GEORGE GRIFSAS QUARTET :: THE PET SHOP BOYS :: PETER COMBE :: THE PHARAOHS :: PHILADELPHIA GRAND JURY :: THE PHOBIAS :: PHOENIX :: PIMPIN' HORUS :: PINK NOISE GENERATOR :: PINKY BEECROFT & THE WHITE RUSSIANS :: PISTOL SHRIMP :: THE PITS :: PIVOT :: THE PIXIES :: PLACEBO :: THE PLEASURE OF BOOKS :: PLUG IN CITY :: PNAU :: POCKET ACE :: POETIKOOL JUSTICE :: POLY & THE STATICS :: POND :: PONY DANCE :: PONYTAIL KINK :: THE POP-UPS :: POPY JANE :: POPEYE & OLIVE OYL :: PORCHLIGHT PARADE :: POST DEATH POST :: THE PRESETS :: PRESTON'S HISTORIC PUNCH & JUDY SHOW :: PRINCE RAMA :: PRINCESS ONE POINT FIVE :: PROBLEMS :: THE PRODIGY :: THE PRO-TOOLS :: THE PROPHETS OF IMPENDING DOOM :: PSYCHEDELIC P*RN CRUMPETS :: THE PSYCHONAUTS :: PUNK JAZZ MONORAIL :: PURITY RING :: PUT DOWNS :: QUA :: QUANTUM CHAOS :: QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE :: QUEST :: QUESTION QUESTION :: QUIET CHILD :: QUIET IN THE LAB! 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:: Sunday, June 18, 2006

DESTROY EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH

each and every week, more and more people are choosing to read SPOZ's RANT over other publications to get their weekend fill of the crazy going's on in and around this 'ere steaming crapholio of Adelaide.. dont believe me? well, why not read some of our (highly fictionalised) glowing testimonials that are flooding into our email inbox on a daily basis and judge for y'self!

NEW YORK TIMES - "I dont know who this is, but I'm changing the locks!"
THE UK DAILY TELEGRAPH - "you suck! no, really.. come around sometime, we got $50! sucky sucky!"
NME - "we love you, no.. wait.. we HATE YOU!.. no.. we LOVE YOU! wait.. who are YOU again?"
SYDNEY MORNING HERALD - "Adelaide? hahaha.. where the FUCK is that? no really.. we're asking?"
THE MELBOURNE AGE - "we highly disapprove of your low brow pedestrian filth! begone you foul wretch!!"
MIXMAG - "duuuuuuuuuude... hahahaha.. I'm so HIGH right now!"
THE ADELAIDE ADVERTISER - "my cat smells like cat food! :)"
SPIN - "you spin me right round baby right round like a record baby right right right round.. uuuugh shit I'm gonna be sick *BLEEAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!*"
BONO - "do you wanna see THE EDGE cry!? do YOU!? coz that's wot yer making him do.. arse!"
ANGELINA JOLIE - "shit.. um, duude? I think we need to talk.. this baby kinda looks a LOT like you!"
THE POPE - "FOR THE ONE MILLIONTH TIME!! there's NO FREAKIN' LEPRECAUNS in the VATICAN!!"
AL JAZEERA - "SPOZ's RANT.. you crack me up! ha ha ha! oh, and DEATH TO ALL AMERICANS!"
GEORGE W BUSH - "uh ee oh.. I did me a poopee poo in me peepee pants *WAAAUUAHH!!*"
TV GUIDE - "we're giving you 4 stars upside the head, bitch!"
ROLLING STONE MAGAZINE - "la la la weeee're not listeeeninnnng! :)"

yup, as you can clearly see.. 9 out've 10 people agree this website should be bombed to the ground, sprinkled with holy water, heavily salted, busted in with sledgehammers and crowbars, doused in petrol, filled in with concrete, dragged thru the streets of London behind 4 horses, drowned, shot at, poisoned and filled with a mixture of birdseed, styrofoam, dessicated coconut and ball bearings and thrown off the nearest tall building into oncoming traffic lest it breed and curse the world to 1000 years of darkness.. such is the unholy terror that is SPOZ's RANT! feaaar the beaaaast!! (oh, and tell yer friends.. cuz we wuv each and wev'wee wun of yuz awwwwww :)


FRIDAY NIGHT
I originally had plans to go see MIRRORLINE, MR WEDNESDAY and DR INVISIBLO (some wackyarse band from Melbourne) cook up a bong load of howling chihuahua rock and stoner ecclectism at JADE MONKEY tonight.. a damn fine plan to be sure (and a plan I normally wouldn't second guess) till, at the last minute I was offered an even BETTER plan tonight to go see BIT BY BATS, STRAIGHT TO VIDEO, ARTAX MISSION and some fuckarse bizarre band from Melbourne called BASEBALL at ROCKET BAR.. go figure?

so, before you could've dropped acid to JEFFERSON AIRPLANE's "WHITE RABBIT" I wuz here at ROCKET BAR.. 9PM, $12 at the door.. and up 2 very steep flights of stairs to sink me first few beers at the bar..



ARTAX MISSION
so, here's the first band for tonight, ARTAX MISSION..



cooking up a witch's brew of swirling psychedelia, howling distortion, lunatic delay pedal screaming, chugging bongrock freakouts and cascading brown notes to the accompanyment of obscure lyrics of existentialist angst and hurricane drumming..



or imagine if you will the unholy love child between WOLFMOTHER and the YEAH YEAH YEAH's (with perhaps a dash of SONIC YOUTH for good measure) delivered to you in a burning brown paper bag at your doorstep by this crazy guitarist / lead singer dude with the AFRO..



and this shrieking priestess of face melting weirdness (also doubling as the bassplayer) as, with the drummer they send you spiraling into the 9th plane of hell.. but, y'know.. in a really really cool way :)



watch as the crazy afro guitarist spins his swirly shit with the guitar forming wave after wave of feedback and cascading riffs to crash around your ears..



be hypnotized by the hypnotic gnashing percussion spiralling out've this most unholy of drumkits..



whilst the female bassplayer totally loses her shit and vibrates out've this dimension..



yup.. it's been a few times now that I've seen these guys play live.. and yet, no matter how many times I see them they never seem to get any less freaking bizarre :)



now that ARTAX MISSION have taken their fill of human sacrifices and melted into the inky blackness of the night, it's time to hit the bar for a few more beers..



STRAIGHT TO VIDEO
as the next band for the night, STRAIGHT TO VIDEO hit the stage..



which in a night of exceptionally mind melting tripped out bands, had the misfortune of having to act as the "straight guys" for tonight..



sure, don't get me wrong, they had it all going for 'em.. they had that uber indie cool UK / NYC shit going for 'em.. sounding equal parts like INTERPOL, BLOC PARTY, THE EDITORS or an extra chirpy JOY DIVISION.. and on any other night they would've totally rocked the dog's bollocks..



but with the sublime line up of circus freaks on offer tonight.. the impact of the wacky hammering indie guitar wuz kinda lost on me.. hmmmm.. perhaps in another setting and another time I'd be more than curious to check ya shit out.. so, like.. hit me up with some promo when ya next gig's coming up.. cool?



with another band done for the night.. it's time to go back to the bar for more beers and also time to soak up some of the ambient weirdness that is the ROCKET BAR..

so here we have a desklamp that also doubles as a DALI'esque pretzel on a CHERNOBYL killing spree.. hmmmmm.. frightening.. angular.. and yet also, indeed most illuminating!



BASEBALL
and now up on stage we have the next band for the night, BASEBALL..



now, I couldn't possibly explain WHY the fuck they were called "BASEBALL"..



or why they had THIS dude on lead vocals near about destroy a violin like he wuz trying to saw his own devil possessed arm off in a pilled out frenzy..



or explain why the crazy music they spewed forth sounded like a mix between a fiddle contest against SATAN and a 15 year old chronic masturbator, the instrumentalist act THE DIRTY THREE on crack, NICK CAVE's old band THE BIRTHDAY PARTY and a whisky soaked bar brawl in a b-grade western..



but holy SHEEiiT wuz it freakin' out've control! and definitely the highlight of the night to see a band like this treat the violin not just as some tacked on cliche.. but work it like a madman would shred a guitar apart strings to fretboard in a gnashing inferno of screaming intensity.. absolute freaking carnage! :)



with the band now finished, it's back to the bar to soak up more beers and to sample some more of ROCKET BAR's weird artistic ambience.. with this brass sculpture I'd like to call "Duck Whistles Vs International Illegal Arms Trade"..

hmmmmm.. indeed most abstractly quasi-political and thought provoking..



BIT BY BATS
and now with my brain sufficiently crawling up the walls after the combined efforts of the last 3 bands, it's time for the headliner act BIT BY BATS to deliver the final killing blow..



BIT BY BATS were formerly (albeit possibly brief) denizens of the Adelaide music scene, having now since moved to Melbourne to terrorise more unsuspecting ears interstate.. but every once and a while they still like to return back to Adelaide to fuck shit up with these crazy gigs.. and for that we are eternally grateful (although, quite possibly our livers will be hating on you the next day)



these guys for the most part are a deadringer for THE CURE, only minus all the wimpy pirate shirt action and the retarded sappy love ballads.. and multiplying on all the thrashing 80's postpunk intensity..



and yet, not only do they feature the indie 80's throwback essentials of icey synths..



all those wacky cascading 80's style guitars set to repeat with reverb and delay into a riffing hurricane..



and them bodypopping angular bass riffs and more than enough pendulum swinging wacky dancepunk beats to drive all them indie art kids into a frenzy on the dancefloor..



but they also happened to feature a lead singer who sounds a deadringer for ROBERT SMITH at his early 80's best who likes to fuck shit up with a theramin.. I mean, shit, how can ya go wrong with a band that has a theramin? it can make ANY tragic pack of nerds sound tragically cool.. just ask PORTISHEAD ;)



sure.. this may've been full blown 80's new romantic cheese at it's finest.. and I might've been seriously drunk by this point.. but DAMN did these guys rock.. I near about destroyed meself to a bloody pulp on the dancefloor in front of stage to this shit.. FUCK YEAAAAH! :)



phew.. so, after 4 bands and who knows how many beers.. it's nearing 1AM, and about time I move to another venue in search of more beer fueled stupidity to entertain me.. so, I bid farewell to the indie stonerism that is THE ROCKET BAR and go staggering down HINDLEY ST towards the inevitable destination that all drunkeness eventually leads any of us to - THE CRANKA..



HINDLEY ST leads me to CURRIE ST, which then leads me to GRENFELL ST, which then leads to me getting lost in the middle of it all as I'm receiving drunken phone messages sending me this way and that (hi SIMONE! drunk enough?) until I finally find a bunch of people on PIRIE ST.. and then the CRANKA 1/2 an hour later..

upon arrival, I'm greeted by some of the usual CRANKA regulars..

BRENDAN the cookie monster..



SARA the red panda (self proclaimed myspace whore and local SUICIDE GIRL pin-up)



JOE BLOGS, who's obviously chosen to drink responsibly tonight..



SIMONE's legs..



SVEN, the METAL MONKEY..



and the ever familiar epilectic dance moves of W SHANE FORSTER..



which then inspires us to seek some of our own epilepsy on the dancefloor..
(and no, I can't explain the shit with the yellow duck either)



this is soon followed by more responsible drinking, *ahem*..



and, um.. wot'ever the FUCK this is meant to be?



and before too long we're all spilling out into the streets..



by 4AM CRANKA is now closing for the night.. so we all pile into SVEN's car as he's waiting for us conveniently by the traffic lights (or perhaps, considering the likes of us, wuz simply trying for a quick get-away and hoping we wouldn't see him passing by.. ooops too late! MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!)



mysteriously, in our search for further venues to continue our adventures.. we find SHOTS has already closed for the night (before 4AM!!??) and later wandering down HINDLEY ST, discover that ENIGMA and SUPERMILD have ALSO closed for the night..

so, with nowhere else to flail around like twatted out lunatics we resort to dancing in the street instead and scaring passing traffic as we go.. hmmmmmm, come to think of it.. even IF places were still open tonight.. would you let THESE people into your venue?

yeah.. I think not ;)



obviously this all has become too much for STUCKEY (who's now decided to sleep the rest of the night off in a blind alley off HINDLEY ST) so, we shake his hand.. ring him a lunatic bus home.. and we're on our merry way (or at least, we would've if he didn't happen to wake up and chase us down the street ;)



with nowhere else open tonight.. coz nobody in their right mind (even as drunk as us) would ever step foot in either the ROSEMONT, the CASINO (or even the dreaded STRATHMORE.. eeeesh!) we decide instead to head down to AUSSIE PIZZA HOUSE on WEST TCE for some end of night munchies.. as much retarded climbing of fences, walls and other such rubbish ensues on the way down there.. which probably explains why it took over 40 minutes to get from the west end of HINDLEY ST to just 100 metres away on WEST TCE.. hmmmmm..



after much pounding on the windows of AUSSIE PIZZA HOUSE (as the place wuz closing up at 5AM), we finally managed to get in, stuff ourselves stupid on pizza and hoot like baboons well into dawn..

a few shades before 6AM and I'm just about washed up for the night.. so, before the sun all turns us to ash.. we run screaming for taxi's the hell out've here.. and home to our respective psychiatric staff..



thus ending one exceptionally messy yet fun filled night of live music and beer fueled carnage throughout the streets of ADELAIDE.. eeeeeeeeeeee! :)


SATURDAY NIGHT
how I'm not dead, I don't know.. how I'm not missing a few vital organs and coughing up blood, gargling razorblades and dribbling in a padded room in a straightjacket is anyone's guess.. but, somehow in defiance of all that is decent in this world.. I find myself once more out on the town for tonight's entertainment - DOUBLE HANDED, SOFT WHITE MACHINE and the one and only TONY FONT SHOW at ENIGMA BAR.. and since obviously, this is barely enough madness for us to handle in one night, we decide to double our fun by also sampling some of the fine acts next door with RUNNING WITH HORSES, MR WEDNESDAY and THE DUMB EARTH playing at JIVE.. phew, it's gonna be one helluva night.. :)

DOUBLE HANDED
so, first up at ENIGMA, we have DOUBLE HANDED on stage..



now, firstly.. I'm kinda confused by the name these guys have chosen.. I mean, shit.. are these guys avid supporters of the AMBIDEXTEROUS? are they advocates for the full fisted 45 degree reach around? do they really love sock puppets? who knows?



I think they once tried adding me to their myspace too.. I distinctly remembered a few months ago looking at their page when the request came thru, thinking "oooh look! another no name bunch of arsehats thinking they can add ME out the blue huh!!? narrr FUCK 'EM!!" as I pressed the "deny" button and laughed hysterically at my own diabolical sense of evil'ness (aaaah how I love doing that :) )



but in hindsight, as progressive doom rock metal acts go, they're actually pretty damn good.. nice work guys! (but seriously, lay off the myspace adds until I've seen at least a FEW of yer gigs.. aiiiight?)



with the first band DOUBLE HANDED now finished and with about 20 minutes to kill whilst SOFT WHITE MACHINE set up their gear.. we decide to duck down to JIVE next door to sink a few beers (coz, seriously.. who DRINKS at ENIGMA if they have the choice?) and to see wot band happens to be on stage..

MR WEDNESDAY
and as luck would have it, as we walk in, we find MR WEDNESDAY up on stage..



and as we slam the door inside and trudge upto the bar hooting like exciteable baboons yelling to the bartender "EEEEY.. JIMMY YA BAAASTARD! HOWZ ABOUT PINT A COOPERS PAAAAALE!!"..



we find the venue has hushed out to nary a mouse fart as MR WEDNESDAY fill the air with subtle nebulous textures of strings, sweeping melancholic synths, cymbal hissing fills and crooning melancholy..



yeah.. *oops* guess you guys heard us from a mile away huh?



still.. there wuz nothing better than to switch from all the noise, the shredding guitars and all the screaming at the ENIGMA.. to relax in between with the subtle nuances of MR WEDNESDAY at JIVE as they weaved in and out like bittersweet windchimes in a light breeze..



yup.. we may've only spent 20 minutes and 1-2 pints of pale here.. a mere hit and run in anyone's books.. but, for the chance to sample just a hint of the subtle swirling flavours MR WEDNESDAY brews up each and every gig, it wuz well worth the trip.. aaaah :)



SOFT WHITE MACHINE
anyhoo.. with our beers done at JIVE, it's back out've the dutch oven and into the fire as we return to ENIGMA to catch SOFT WHITE MACHINE firing up on the hotplate..



so, here's KARL doing his trademark toddler hissy fit with the guitar..



whilst ANDREAS's mullet shines all fluffy and bright in the stage lights..



JETT chunks up the brown notes (now ever more vigilant for any farts that may prove 3-dimensional)



whilst NICK hides out in the back and smashing the drums within an inch of their lives..



hmmmmm.. is it just me, or does KARL kinda look like rainman when he's up there? ;)



meanwhile ANDREAS attempts to find himself even more stage lighting to show off his mullet..



whilst JETT takes some personal time with a microphone..



and yet, somehow within all these silly theatrics.. they've once again cooked up yet another sublime ear splitting orchestra of hurricane guitars, swinging monkey funk beats and wacky spanish harmonising and art-metal terror that damn near brings the roof down around our ears.. oooooh yeaaah!



now that the aliens have arrived to abduct ANDREAS to further their hair sciences.. we know it's time to swap venues once more to JIVE, to fill up on more beers and more ecclectic musical weirdness..



DUMB EARTH
as we spot DUMB EARTH up on stage..



making for something that would either sound like TOM WAITS backing band, a NEW ORLEANS funeral march or something you'd find as the backing soundtrack to a haemorrhoids ad..



it wuz swampy, it wuz bluesy, it wuz slow and languid, damn near creepy and it really freaked me the fuck out.. but, yeah.. it wuz kinda cool all the same..



TONY FONT SHOW
but obviously, too much of this would've damn near destroyed our fragile brain's.. so we switched back to ENIGMA to catch headliner act TONY FONT SHOW in full flight on stage.. mixing equal parts SYSTEM OF A DOWN, PRIMUS, RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS, FAITH NO MORE and wot sounded like an angry homeless guy with tourette's syndrome wrestling random strangers for spare change..



so, in presenting the TONY FONT SHOW tonight, we have twitchy LEE on schitzoid vocals..



accompanied by the subtle ever shifting moods of RICHARD destroying his guitar with noodling ease..



as MATT does the incomprehensible happy man dance on bass guitar..



whilst PHIL the satan spawn drummer.. hides at the back.. gnashes away at the drums.. and waits.. ever so patiently.. for that one fatefull day when he can strike with a delirious brain eating fury and destroy us all.. maaaaaaaauuuuggghhh!!



meanwhile as the surging sea of people in front of the stage reaches boiling point, LEE tries for his best MOSES impersonation, and parts the red sea to make way for beer rider to be delivered on stage..



whilst MATT is lost in his own little world, honking out accompanying dog barkings to his spleen twisting psychedelic bass cutups and brown note funk showers..



before too long RICHARD's freaky sub molecular vibrations has let loose on LEE brain once again, turning his thought processes to jelly..



and so once more, another set ends with LEE on the floor flip flopping around like a fish out've water screaming unholy murder at all of us for putting him there.. aaaaaah, good times.. gooood times :)



but with the crowd hooting for more and baying for blood.. you know this isn't the end of it.. as TONY FONT SHOW are called back on stage once more for an encore, as they deliver us a cover of FAITH NO MORE's "THE GENTLE ART OF MAKING ENEMIES".. and in doing so, LEE makes for one monumental blunder on the night when he says THIS to the microphone..

"oh.. and if anyone else knows the words to this song, feel free to join me up on stage!"

yup, and just like THE PRESETS, or ANGELIK from a week ago.. another free-for-all has erupted on stage.. as a whole bunch of us idiots (including myself) find ourselves up there making total twits of ourselves in front of the microphone and all over the shit running amok like children.. as TONY FONT SHOW do their best to play along with the chaos erupting around them as they thrash ENIGMA out to one helluva brain melting finale.. hmmmmmmm.. another free-for-all on stage.. coincidence? or is possible that members of the TONY FONT SHOW are getting crazy ideas from my blog? (not to mention how many other bands are thinking of trying this shit out now) oooooh shit.. what HAVE I DONE!! WOT HAVE I CREATED!!?

anyhoo, with the ENIGMA reduced to a smouldering ruin.. we say goodbye to PHIL's diabolical drumkit and head out onto the street with aims for furthering our stupidity..



from ENIGMA, there's a brief stopover as we gatecrash some crazyarse private party at KAOS cafe.. with a DJ cranking out some shredding smooth breakbeat terrorism, whilst the bar charges $7 for a stubbie of PALE ALE (ouch!), as we cue much retarded epilepsy moves on the dancefloor till about 2AM..

eventually at 2:30AM, I next find myself at the CRANKA and where many more beers follow..



and once again, just like clockwork.. I'm back on the dancefloor at the CRANKA making a total twit of meself till the wee hours of the morning, where I soon find THIS twit (one of LAKEN's crazy friend's I think) climbing the walls and ceiling at the corner of the CRANKA dancefloor pulling some fucked up dance moves whilst the rest of us cheer him on.. WOOOO! YEAAAH!! ROCK!!!



ummmmm.. yup.. when you see this shit going on at the CRANKA, you know it's time to leave!

and so.. at 3:30AM, and with my brain reduced to a fine liquid mush, I make my way out and pile myself into the last late night $6 bus and head on home..

and, thus ends yet another freaking epic odyssey of a weekend of the SPOZ :)

Previously on Spoz's Rant: Deleted Scenes And Outtakes

:: Spoz 11:44 PM |
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