JUST PRETEND YOU'RE SWATTING IMAGINERY BATSeaster long weekend is a weird weekend..
do a 4 day work holiday, during a full moon.. and then, restrict all the alcohol, shut down all the venues and send people scurrying to the four winds only to cause howling car wreck inferno's thru the back streets of Adelaide.. ooooh yes, smells a LOT like easter..
easter can mean slim pickings, it can also mean, you wind up in some of the weirdest places in search of your usual weekend brain escape.. more wound up than usual, coz your all crazy with the full moon and howling beserk, but with distinct lack of beer to shut you up.. yeah, if you're lucky.. you stock up well in advance and flee the city.. if not, you end up looking at an empty bathtub of ice.. wondering where all your Coopers Pale's went..
anywaze.. once again, here's my stoner vague photographic record of this weekend..
(yup.. that's right.. I got me camera back... all fixed.. and only $180 to repair it.. yeeeouuuch!)
yeah.. ok, these really don't explain fuckall now, do they?
so, fuckit.. for all you peeps who live vicariously thru my weekends.. here's the blow-by-blow description of my insane easter weekend..
FRIDAY NIGHT1. two parties.. at opposite ends of the insanity spectrum.. 1st party, slap bang in the middle of yuppieville.. BBQ setting.. CD player playing early 90's acid jazz cheese, jamiroquai knock offs, coffee table house music and 21st century disco bollocks.. freakishingly geometric square obssessed minimalist lawn garden.. big geometric square blocks with set lighting.. a water fountain that looked like someone taking a piss on a game of Jenga.. aaaand the place had it's very own chapel (yeah, weird.. right) converted into what had to be THE most sterile / white wall / polished wood floor graphic design studio I'd ever seen.. save for some sparse swedish foam furniture, an imac, and a bung arcade game of space invaders.. it looked for all intents like some kinda 21st century update on a pharoah's tomb.. yup.. yuppies.. can't understand 'em to save me life.. but will attempt to party with 'em all the same.. still.. peeps there were cool enough.. they had good food.. I ate that food.. I hang around the edges and talked philosophical shit.. kind've the thing you do at these parties.. just the thing I paid over $10,000 in HEC's debt so I could talk intellectual bollocks with these peeps.. :P ..aaah, but all jokes aside.. it was a good party.. cruisy.. but good..
2. 2nd party.. an entirely different beast altogether.. some dude's birthday party (cheers geddy!).. gothics, metalheadz, bohemian artist freaks, musical prankers and shambling hairy drunkards.. yeah, this wuz much more like my kind've crowd.. within 10 minutes of arriving.. some funny bastard had called a stripper on the birthday drunk.. problem was.. he wuz so blastingly drunk and only 15 minutes ago had dropped some drugs (which were just kicking in) that he was in NO mood for any kind've stripper shennanigans.. wot followed was either (a) funny as fuck (b) embarassingly as hell.. depending on who's viewpoint you took.. yeah, didn't take any photo's.. coz hey, don't wanna embarass the dude further.. seeing someone totally blotto and tripping balls on drugs, wearing only his jocks and reluctantly eating marshmellows off a stripper whilst everyone else is piss larfing.. is not something I'd wanna put the dude thru the embarasment of the 2nd time.. still, it's not like you see this kinda antics everyday (so hey, I found it funny).. this wuz then followed by (a) a crazy DnB DJ (cheers Nate Hate!) and (b) a circus performer pissing about with a shitload of hula hoops.. oh.. and some bastard drank all me Coopers Pale Ale's.. arsehat.. (but hey.. that's Good Friday for ya..)
3. apparently I accidently ended up in some band's music video.. yeah, this ain't the first and last time this kinda shit happens.. the story goes.. there wuz this band - "SIR GERBIL".. they played a gig at Jive, back in December.. with another few bands.. dude's I know.. anywaze.. by the time Sir Gerbil had hit the stage.. I wuz absolutely blotto.. and going sick at it, burning a hole in the dancefloor like a hairy flailing wookie at Woodstock.. apparently an inflatable dolphin was involved too (don't ask).. anywaze, the whole thing ends up on camera.. and so, I've ended up in their music video.. I'd recommend ya catch it.. should be on RAGE during the 4AM stoner local video sessions.. just look for the psychedelic video with the big wacky keyboard, the singing sockpuppets.. and some hairy dickhead wrestling with a blowup dolphin.. yup, this is the kinda shit that may just haunt me years down the track..
SATURDAY NIGHT
4. a lo-fi idiot night of musical stonerisms.. (the night I actually took the photos).. checked out a new venue called "THE LIZARD LOUNGE".. on Hindley St, just off King William St.. look for the big sign with the lizards, it's downstairs.. (in the old Pizza Hut).. and yeah, fucken funny place.. considering it's shaped just like a pizza parlour with all the little booth seats n shit.. not a bad vibe, very stoner lo-fi.. very much the gonzo / weird alternative shrooms kinda crowd.. caught a gig by SPATIAL MONKEY - somewhat like wot would happen if Jar Jar Binks started a surf/punk/reggae/deep dub echo hiphop act.. with this crazed hooting idiot with dreds and a smurf hat jumping around like a retarded loon, shrieking unintelligible shit thru a mic with an echo delay, whilst a band (featuring a saxophone player) played stoner funk shit behind him.. yeah.. damn cool shit.. makes me wanna abuse da herb.. I gotta catch more of their sets.. this wuz then followed by an endless string of more or less the SAME indie / stoner hiphop crew.. just swapping around MC's every few songs and calling themselves a different act.. followed by NEW POLLUTANTS.. Adelaide's answer to BECK having a fight to the death with a C64..
5. THE LIZARD LOUNGE.. as well as having the bottled beer, the wacky booth seats.. the carpet.. also had these really cool complimentary miniature shepherd's pies and other heated nibbles.. yeah, they were real good.. just thought I'd mention 'em..
6. staggered into JADE MONKEY.. to catch the last 5 minutes of some weird freebasin' super group freak-out.. didn't catch enough of it to figure why every member had some nazi style wacky red arm band, or why the lead singer wuz wearing paint overalls and clucking like a chicken.. but hey, I'm not here to understand.. I'm just here to make fun of people..
yeah.. it wuz an ecclectic weekend of weirdness..
sure beat staying at home and watching me toilet bowl overflow..
next weekend, watch out.. Friday Night - APRIL FOOL's DAY! (muhahahaha!)
Previously on Spoz's Rant:
This Is Your Brain On Drugs