:: Tuesday, May 02, 2006
KLEPTO BALL / FRANKENSTEIN POOL
this is a photo of a yellow billiard ball that I somehow managed to find in my possession after the misadventures of last weekend.. as to why I have this billiard ball or how it came into my possession is anyone's guess.. but, it does bring to mind an incredibly insane concept I've been cooking up over the last few days, a concept that I'd like to share with you all now..
the concept is a game.. a game that's likely well suited for all you lunatic university students out there who always insist on going out on all those idiotic themed PUB CRAWLS each and every weekend in matching t-shirts that say "THOMAS THE TANKED ENGINE" (or something equally more retarded but "oh so witty").. yeah.. YOU guys! I know yer reading.. listen up.. you might really enjoy this one..
this game runs as a simple variation of the infamous "barstool" game - when you arrive at the first venue for the night, proceed to the pool tables and try and swipe as many of the balls as you can.. it doesn't really matter which balls (although, if you manage to swipe either the white ball or the black, yer a freaking legend) just make sure you don't get caught, keep track of how many you swiped and stash 'em all away for safe keeping.. once you've succeeded in your mission, proceed to the next venue, find the pool tables there and then deposit all of the balls you stole from the previous venue (if you stole a large number of balls, it'll help to spread them around so as not to arouse suspicion) once you've made your deposit.. withdraw (steal) an equal amount of NEW balls from this venue.. repeat each venue till if possible you finish up at the first venue you started with so as to replace all the balls you stole from there with all the new ones.. so that way, you haven't really stolen any of these balls.. you're merely replacing them all ;)
now the results from your first night should be small enough so as not to arouse suspicion from the public at large.. but, once you accumilate your efforts over a series of weekends you should begin to notice some truly spectactular results as each and every venue you frequent will now feature pool tables with the most horribly mismatched frankenstein collections of balls imaginable.. just think - tables with 5 eight balls, tables with none, tables missing the white ball, tables with too many "BIGS", or no bigs at all, balls of different styles and sizes all mashed together in ludicrous mess.. all this could be yours!
of course, there's no chance in hell I'd ever admit to doing anything this stupid myself, or ever seriously advocate that YOU attempt this game (coz obviously for LEGAL reasons I'd hafta discourage you from such public acts of mischief, especially from any venues I would like to frequent) but just THINK of the potential if this plan was ever put into action.. it'd be absolute chaos.. :)
:: Spoz 11:57 PM |