SURFING THE LUNATIC FRINGE BY THE TIDES OF THE FULL MOON
"dont go out tonight.. it's bound to end your life.. theeeere's a baaad moon on the rise!"
yup, no truer horribly misquoted words from a cheesy 70's song who's name I've since forgotten have ever been spoke about, than on this particular weekend of the full moon.. except.. well.. it wesn't exactly bad.. and in fact as weekend's go, it wuz a pretty damn fucken good one.. and it didn't end my life.. at least, I don't THINK it ended my life? unless the afterlife is merely a stringing together of inconsequential sequels to your real life that no movie studio big-wig in an executive toilet-basin cocaine binge would ever be insane enough to greenlight in a month of Sunday's (and yet, they still let them do a 4th SCARY MOVIE!? wot the FUCK is up with that!?).. so, to all you peeps out there unknowingly coexisting in my afterlife surreality construct, I hope I can entertain you all until the sober awareness of your untimely death erupts into your consciousness sometime on Monday and gives you the frontal lobe bluescreen of death.. coz hey, chances are we're already dead and all of this is just but a fading memory.. ;)
and as I sit back and chuckle whilst all your brains explode like bubble wrap in a vacuum attempting to comprehend all that.. here's this weekend photo's.. pop 2 aspirin, wait till the room stops spinning and ENJOY THE RIDE!
and now for the weekend that more and more mouse potato's in Adelaide choose to live vicariously by each week.. I present to you the alcoholic rollercoaster that is the WEEKEND OF SPOZ! (now available in widescreen / high definition)THURSDAY
dunno why I'm mentioning Thursday.. sometimes Thursday nights are fuckin' great.. this Thursday was a waste.. sure.. it had a nice smell.. but stepping thru it left an awful mess and it took days to get it out've the carpets.. yeah.. Thursday, the speed bump before Friday.. it could go either way.. had a few lazy afternoon beers at JIVE after shopping for some shit in Rundle Mall.. then downed this one Jagermeister shot that shot me synapses to hell and left me a dribbling mess the rest of the night.. damn you Beechy, you killed SPOZ's brain.. yoooo baaaastard! (there, you get mentioned in a blog.. happy now? hahahaha) went home to grab some dinner to sober up.. returned and proceeded to play a few losing games of FOOZ, half ignored the first 2 bands (meh..) till then deciding to duck out before the main event I wuz actually there to see (ooops, sorry BLACK DOVES!) since everyone else I knew had farted off an hour earlier and I was the one stuck with the weirdo from South Africa.. dammit! so, yeah.. that explains that one "backstage" shot of BLACK DOVES (we thought it wuz pissy funny at the time..) and fuck all else..
but hey.. that's Thursday for ya.. you can never predict wot will happen :PFRIDAY NIGHT
many odd choices presented this night.. I could've gone to see CASIO BROTHERS at the RHINO ROOM.. I could've seen MY SISTER THE COP play at the CRANKA.. I could've done all manner of things.. but, for reasons I can't quite fathom.. I chose instead for the ecclectic stonerism of what was on offer at the ROCKET BAR - LITTLE ICE AGE, NO THROUGH ROAD and EXPATRIATE from SYDNEY.. and for added entertainment, the drunks were out in force tonight too.. with numerous reports along the public transport networks of Adelaide of all sorts of colourfully drunken characters getting yelled at by the drivers and self destructing on buses and trains.. and I really couldn't put 2 and 2 together as to WHY all the drunks were out so early (surely it wuzn't the CLIPSAL 500 already) till it all became all too obvious later in the weekend.. 3 words explained it all.. FULL MOON BAAAAAAABY!
so I knew I wuz in for a good one.. but anyhoo.. on with the show..
first up at ROCKET BAR, LITTLE ICE AGE - and since my collection of blissfully esoteric indie-stoner rock bands is somewhat thin on the ground.. I have few reference points to truly do justice to their sound.. all I can think of, is early 90's SMASHING PUMPKINS in their more reflective moments.. or kinda like SOMETHING FOR KATE without all the wanky stoner intellectualist pretense (a description that'll likely bring any SOMETHING FOR KATE fan to violence, if only they could put down the bong and the tv remote and dare me to a fight).. but no, really.. I quite liked these guys.. a little too mellow for the start of the weekend and they'd be brilliant at the END for the comedown.. but, still.. a real nice sound.. sure, the lead singer may've looked like the awkward progeny of that 70's DOCTOR WHO actor with the crazy red afro and all the fuckoff scarves.. and that female bass player resembled an indie geek's fantasy with her hair wafting hypnotically to a conveniently placed fan as she played (wooooo.. so pretty!).. but they were real cool.. they could play at my funeral or drug rehab anytime! YAY!
(makes me wonder tho'.. what is up with all these damn cute female bass players in Adelaide bands of late!? it's like they're freaking everywhere all a sudden! wot the fuck is UP with that? hmmm.. more investigation methinks.. is there some kinda government program / scholarship / initiative I don't know about perhaps?)
up next, NO THROUGH ROAD - a band I've only been familiar with, thru the lead singer's former association with Adelaide's most dreaded email spam band - 5NYTK! (aka: "FIVE NOW YOU'RE TALKING!").. if you were in any way associated with the Adelaide music scene and had an email account in the early 00's.. you would've known ALL about these guys and cursed the grouind they walked on.. still.. since the band's eventual breakup (after, wot wuz it? 50 albums and a mock live BBC sessions recording?) I'd been hearing nothing but good things about the lead singer and his crazy solo antics thru the smellier venues of Adelaide.. "music to blissfully slit your wrists to!" they would say.. yeah.. I didn't know wot to expect with these guys.. but when they leapt on stage, they did some real damage and gained my appreciation.. think of them as being like the rock band art intellectuals could consider a "guilty pleasure" and drink bad CASK WINE too.. like WEEZER's messier and more obnoxious kid brother.. like BEN LEE, but without all the pop leanings and wanting to do a BERNARD FANNING and punch the guy's face in for writing that damn "CATCH MY DISEASE".. like some scruffy little geek band on a bender looking for carnage.. yeah.. I liked this shit.. it made me wanna drink like a fish and yell heckling abuse right back at 'em.. yeah! I really didn't expect these dudes to rock.. but they really did.. rock!
at this point.. after the 2nd band.. I made a short pitstop at JIVE to meet up with some freaks who'd been at FOWLERS that night (forgot which band).. and for cheap entertainment I witnessed one particularly infamous Adelaide drummer (who's name I wont mention) blithering around the venue in a drunken tornado shrieking demented riff-rock song lyrics at the top of his lungs like a strangled cat.. yeah.. ok.. so I've got his photo in this blog, so no guesses who it wuz.. but DAMN that dude's funny when he's on the sauce.. ROCK ON KEMPY YOU CRAZY BASTARD!!
after that detour I returned to the ROCKET BAR, to catch the final act of the night.. the big wacky headliner, EXPATRIATE - and yeah.. I wuzn't expecting anything from these dudes.. I didn't know them from a bar of soap or a barrel of fish heads.. but DAMN did these bastards ROCK! the reverb fx layerings of their hammering guitar riffage magnified by my own dribblingly alcoholic brain made for wot sounded like a freaking orchestra of noise bouncing around my skull and I couldn't get enough of the stuff..kinda like THE CURE, mixed with INTERPOL and the BLOC PARTY cranked up like a Tokyo bullet train.. a freaking juggernaut of chugging new wave wailing that made me go totally loopy on the dancefloor.. and it kinda helped that they looked like recent escapees from 80's EAST BERLIN too.. if only they could loop cartoon footage from that failed ITCHY and SCRATCHY knockoff cartoon "PARASITE and WORKER" then the illusion would be complete (didn't they steal that idea off an ACTUAL eastern european graphic novel MAUS? hmm.. perhaps I should look that up.. narrrr fuckit) yeah.. these freaks blew me away.. and in a drunken delerium I even ended up buying the EP.. it's not too bad either (somewhat comparable to BIT BY BATS, without much of the ROBERT SMITH vocal exaggeration).. yeah, next time these guys are in Adelaide.. seriously.. go see 'em!
after the gig.. a bunch of us drunks then found ourselves at SUPERMILD making a total mess of the dancefloor.. till finally at 4AM, I got the hell out've there.. got home and passed out..SATURDAY NIGHT
tonight it was YOUR MOTIVE FOR, and some band who's name I've since forgot.. something CHEESE, or BURGER, or SAND CASTLE.. perhaps they were called THE SAND CASTLE BURGER CHEESE QUARTET.. fukkit.. either way.. the whole mess was at JADE MONKEY to help celebrate Heath Weber's birthday and the birthday of some other dude who's name I've also since forgotten.. yeah.. um.. shit.. my memory's shot to hell over a lot this weekend aye? (and considering how much I drank, I'm reaaaally not surprised)
first up tonight, WHITE CASTLE BURGER AND THE SAND PEOPLE (fuck.. nah, that's still not it) - and yeah.. apparently a lot've people really dug this stuff.. this kinda easy going, cruisy, surf ensemble, cheerful rock with the sit down strumming acoustic guitar and the 6-7 piece band.. but, as much as I respect these guys (coz they were real good) it wuz all kinda lost on me.. so, for the most part, I sat this band out in the beer garden drinking it up with all the recreational smoking brain casualties.. but hey, as much as I could tell.. peeps really liked this band.. so, respect for wot you do, aye?
up next, the main act of the night.. YOUR MOTIVE FOR - and sure, I've made fun of these guys recently for their infrequent gigging and half arsed unenthused performances.. but this time.. I dunno if it was the full moon, the fact it wuz HEATH WEBER's birthday (he's the lead singer), the tag-teaming drummers by LEY and SEAN KEMP, the brilliant mix over the PA or wot.. but these guys fucking blew the roof off.. I reckon it's the best I've ever seen these guys play.. they freaking blew the fuck out've the joint and if it wuzn't for the sound architecture of the JADE MONKEY (complete with leaking roof) then it would've taken emergency crews a full week of day and night digging thru the rubble to find all the survivors still with demented grins on their faces.. yeah.. it wuz that good.. weird to think this many years on I'd find these kwazy kats back at the top of their game.. freaky.. really makes me look forward to their gigs again.. (if they actually decide to play more often now.. aaaaye? too much to ask too soon? BRING ON THE CARNAGE YO!)
after YOUR MOTIVE FOR, we were then ambushed by some crazy improv HIPHOP freestyle assault on stage whilst one freak (a DJ from 3D radio?) and some other nutjob tag-teamed lyrical flows over SEAN KEMP's sledgehammer broken beat percussion for over 1/2 an hour.. I really couldn't make a fuckload of sense of wot the hell it all meant and none of it seemed planned.. but it sure wuz seriously fucken cool.. and once again, likely something in hindsight we could blame on the FULL MOON..
afterwards a whole bunch of us drank ourselves into a stupour at the JADE MONKEY.. till finally surfacing outside at 3AM with very mixed ideas of wot the hell to do next.. I heard rumours of SHOTS, SUGAR and PJ O'BRIEN's.. I briefly entertained the notion of going to SUGAR.. till I realised it was $5 entry and it was freaking SUGAR, and then thought better of it.. so, instead I made my way briefly to the CRANKA bumping into PAUL BELIAL from CIRCLE CLAN in an even messier state of drunk than I wuz and pissed on.. finally piling into a drunken end of night bus at 4AM..
I thought this was the end of the night.. but, for some freaky reason.. the entire late night bus wuz packed to the ceiling with assorted very loud drunks also on a night out on the piss (which is a rarity for all but maybe 3-4 rare weekends of the year when I usually end up with an empty bus).. I would've thought they were rejects from the D&D BALL that wuz also held that night.. except none of them were dressed like penguins.. eh, go figure.. FULL MOON aye?
just think.. next weekend or so it looks to be the start of the FRINGE / ADELAIDE ARTS FESTIVAL.. so it's only gonna get crazier around here.. oooooyeaaaah! can't freakin' wait... BRING ON THE HUMAN ZOO YO! :)
and finally in leaving.. here's the playlist of albums / songs I cranked in writing this weekend blog.. collect them all!
CRYSTAL METHOD - VEGAS
EXPATRIATE - LOVERS LE STRANGE EP
select mix #1
..MUNCHKIN - THIS IS GOODBYE (JAM)
..BJORK - HYPERBALLAD
..THOM YORKE + PJ HARVEY - THIS MESS WE'RE IN
..GOODHED - A FOREST (LIVE AT THE CRANKA, JULY 23rd 2004)
..MARILYN MANSON - TAINTED LOVE
..BLOC PARTY - BANQUET (PHONES DISCO EDIT)
INTERPOL - ANTICS
SNEAKER PIMPS - BLOODSPORT
FELIX DA HOUSECAT - DEVIN DAZZLE & THE NEON FEVER
select mix #2
..JEFFERSON AIRPLANE - WHITE RABBIT
..THIEVERY CORPORATION - LEBANESE BLONDE
..BLONDIE - RAPTURE
..STEREO MC's - GET CONNECTED
..LL COOL J - MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT
..MARRS - PUMP UP THE VOLUME
that's all folks!
come by again next weekend and see how the other idiot lives!
Previously on Spoz's Rant: Substance Abuse