:: Monday, May 02, 2005
ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
ok.. so this has been the 3rd time in as many weeks that I've watched this film.. I dunno, seems the damn thing resonates with me brain in some way.. yeah.. damn fucken thing.. like that whole internal dialogue that Jim Carey's character rambles thru at the start of the film.. I can totally relate to it.. someone has finally captured the sound of that voice of twitching doubt that lives in ya head and just tears shit apart in that introspective comically passive aggressive kind've way.. "sand is overrated.. it's just tiny rocks.." it's like beyond the social puppetry.. the comical jumping thru hoops.. 1 liner gags.. we're all this guy.. this nervous.. twitchy.. shy little freak.. hmmm.. yeah.. guess it beats watching Taxi Driver over and over.. apparently that drove Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails insane before releasing "The Fragile" in 1999..
it's like.. after watching this film.. (again) I swear I must've had MY memory erased.. like, I must have a whole segment of my mind that's now missing.. and I can only taste the edges of it.. coz this film reminds me of what'ever that is.. or, perhaps just fools me into believing I've forgotten something so insane and brilliant.. that I couldn't contain it.. and to avoid it destroying me.. I had to leave it.. like, maybe I've left a lot of things.. living this creative monk like existence.. checks and balances.. hoping it weights out to my advantage in the long run.. I think it'll work out alright.. it usually does.. it has upto this point.. even despite the gaping holes.. I swear they were filled with something.. anything.. and not these blank pages I face now.. yeah, it's like after watching The Matrix.. (the first one.. not the overblown sequels) you believe.. that maybe you ARE just a battery, all foetal and trapped in some AI machine battery farm.. maybe there IS more than just THIS.. this day to day routine we make for ourselves to distract ourselves from the big questions that'd otherwise face us.. (and it's up to us artists to explore.. and answer.. methinks..)
so yeah, pushing past my equally twitchy introsepctive dialogue here (written conveniently out loud here for all you to read).. I'd recommend ya see this film.. probably the best film of 2004.. yeah.. gotta love those mindfuck films.. films that mess with the notion of memory.. coz hey, lets face it.. in the end.. everything is just memories of things past.. things dissolving into half forgotten mush.. better times.. times better left buried.. everything getting mixed up.. the details all vague.. just a fog of happenstance.. shadows of life lived.. and lost.. feelings you wish you felt at the time.. or didn't.. mammalian brain.. reptilian brain.. the big rational frontal lobe making a mess of things by trying to make sense.. was it a dream? was I really here? is this deja vu? is this brain damage? one brilliant idea crushed by the anticipation of the next.. hahaha.. fuck I'm vague writing blog posts after 3AM.. yeah.. the best films are like that.. something not best described in 1 or 2 neatly sound bite format lines.. not something you can just make a quote about and slap on the movie poster.. 5 STARS!! blah blah blah.. yeah.. see this film.. it affected me.. damn thing inspires me.. I wish I wrote this film.. dammit..
yeah.. who'ever makes these films.. make more.. you inspire me to one day hope to create the soundtrack to your masterpiece.. or, perhaps my album IS that soundtrack.. just looking for the movie to fulfill that vision in my head.. synaesthesia.. trap the brain.. and play it like a violin..
I'd normally attack this post with some vicious editing..
but, fukkit.. you sort it out.. ;)
:: Spoz 3:39 AM |