:: Friday, February 11, 2005
IF IT AIN'T FIXED, DON'T BREAK IT
yeah, it's funny when things dont go to plan.. I could've sworn this would work.. I mean, shit.. it's always happened in the past (much to my annoyance).. so why is it, just when I want this to work.. it DOESN'T?
y'see.. there's this thing that mobile phones do.. or, as I discovered once did, and now.. with these shiny new MMS / MP3 / videophone / mindcontrolling / startrek type communicator things.. they DONT do..
anyone who owns a computer.. and uses said computer as any kind've stereo / games machine.. or at least, just has the speakers up loud.. would've encountered this odd effect..
it seems.. everytime one of them mobile phone's is contacted, whether thru SMS or someone ringing thru.. it'll, without fail, just before the phone rings or makes that SMS ding noise.. trigger this really tweaked out nutty skittish flinting beep static noise thru the computer speakers.. a signature pattern of sonic interference.. really quite unmistakable.. you may've heard it countless times before.. and likely you just found it real annoying.. and I just bet it was people just like YOU I have to blame for this.. yeah, I know your type.. one little thing niggles you.. like the static interference from a mobile phone or Janet Jackson's exposed nipple.. and you go and complain in your 100's and 1000's.. and you ruin ALL our fun.. yoooooo make me SICK!! HA!!
y'see.. like you, I've heard this sound countless times before.. but I didn't see it as mere annoyance.. people like us.. crazy musician types.. sample freaks.. worshippers of the found sound react different to such patterns of static.. we hear something else.. we see potential.. maybe.. just maybe, we'd actually think to capture that sound.. mess with it.. and USE IT.. why? coz we're that shit crazy and full of sugar.. that's why!
so, finally I got meself a mobile phone.. and the thought occurs to me.. "HEY, I COULD SAMPLE THIS SOUND!!!" I mean, fuck.. it does just about everything else, this phone is a freaking beast it could knock UFO's out've orbit if it wanted to.. it could probably read my thoughts.. I bet it's doing that riiiight now.. (oh crap.. we're all gonna die!)
yeah.. problem is.. I can't get the damn thing to work!! - I've hooked up a mini recording device with a microphone to my PC speakers and cranked it up loud.. I've turned the speakers way up to magnify the signal.. I put the mobile phone right next to the fucken thing, set to vibrate (no dial tone).. all set up in similar conditions to how it's usually triggered.. and then I ring myself.. and.. NOTHING!!
I've tried ringing it whilst moving the phone around various locations.. I've tried SMS'ing myself.. and dammit.. it looks like those spotty bastards at SONY ERICSSON has fixed a problem I never wanted fixed.. I WANTED IT TO INTERFERE DAMMIT.. SO I COULD RECORD IT!! so, unless I'm really doing this wrong.. I'm gonna need access to a much shittier / older phone.. ideally one of those stock standard text display NOKIA dealies.. and record that.. (any other suggestions? anything I might be missing to get this effect to work?)
yeah.. sometimes some problems really should never be fixed..
:: Spoz 1:24 AM |