:: Sunday, August 15, 2004
THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO "GUUUUH!?"
There's many great mysteries in this world, things that cannot be fully explained rationally, thru adherance to logic or codes of science.. like, how did they build the pyramids? stonehenge? those easter island statues? is there indeed a hidden vault underneath the Sphinx with evidence of Atlantis and aliens? does the government keep in communication with beings from another planet and just not tell us? is Michael Jackson one of them? wot the FUCK is the deal with rising petrol prices and dont governments realise that with limited resources and rising demand thru the industrial and developing countries.. we're gonna RUN out've oil supplies sooner than we think and when we do, it's gonna be WW3 and we're SCREWED!!?? HUH!?? DID YA THINK OF THAT GEORGE W (CHIMP) "I-LOVE-TEXAS-OIL" BUSH!!?..
yes.. these ARE important questions.. but, there are greater mysteries in this world..
and it is these mysteries I seek to find answers to..
things that baffle me..
yes.. these truly, are glitches in the matrix..
Neo, it's time to wake up..
1. is it just me.. or does Avril Lavigne look like a weasel.. no, seriously.. I'm not insane.. look at her.. with her strange little weasel teeth and her dead eye stare and floppy hair.. seriously.. she's a freakin' rodent of some kind.. and it really sorta bothers me.. then again, so did Fiona Apple.. seriously WOT the hell happened to her? I'm not a fan at all.. but.. guh? and can someone PLEASE explain to me.. wot the FUCK is this shit about the OLSEN TWINS and HILARY DUFF?? (hmm.. perhaps they're also weasels..? perhaps it's a giant weasel conspiracy..?)
2. the "sound effect" voice guy from the POLICE ACADEMY movies.. um.. y'know.. that black dude.. wot'sisname.. wot the HELL happened to that dude? is he still alive? in Guantanemo Bay as a suspected terrorist? on the moon? WOT?
3. this really bugs me.. but there seems to be waaay too many bands with the name "PATROL" in them.. case in point - SNOW PATROL (scottish band), FUR PATROL (new zealand band?) SPECIAL PATROL GROUP (local band).. is using the world "PATROL" the new "THE".. should we now rename "THE WHITE STRIPES" and "THE STROKES" as "WHITE STRIPE PATROL" and the "STROKES PATROL"??
4. wot the FUCK is it with everyone having birthday's in August? seriously.. it's freakin' nuts.. somebody (not me.. really, I couldn't be fucked) should like.. do some statistical analysis.. and figure this out.. ok, maybe it's just a LOT of xmas dickin'.. or somethin'.. but WHY August?? is THAT way they call it the "season to be jolly"?? hmmmmm..
5. how many times can we dig up the 80's AGAIN and AGAIN before it just gets, like.. REALLY old?.. maybe it'll just be this thing.. every few years.. we'll just reinvent the 80's for the next generation..? it'll be like this thing.. I dunno.. maybe when WE grew up in the 80's.. it wasn't the FIRST 80's.. perhaps, it's happened before.. and all that shit about the 70's and the 60's was actually invented as a smokescreen by advertising companies to sell more sneakers or somethin'..
6. I read this somewhere and this really sorta tripped me out.. according to statistics.. or wot'ever, our little city of Adelaide.. population - 1 million, has a suburban sprawl 90km wide from north to south.. and yeah sure.. you're thinkin'.. "so wot dude?" - now, to compare.. Los Angeles.. population, I dunno.. at least 10 x that.. has a suburban sprawl of 150km.. which really is not that much bigger considering the population difference.. so, WOT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ADELAIDE's public transport system HUH!!??
7. somebody pointed this out to me.. wot'ever happened to the "Sixth Sense" kid?.. is he another drug addled HOME ALONE casualty? gone the way of that dude who played John Connor in TERMINATOR 2? seriously.. where did he go?
8. I dunno if anyone else gets these, or if it's just me.. but.. on a regular basis.. sometimes every day.. sometimes MULTIPLE times a day.. I get these emails.. and, yeah.. I know wot ya thinkin'.. "blah blah.. spoz bitches about spam".. yeah yeah, ok.. BUT.. have ya ever got THIS - (and I get this quite regularly) an email sent to you from NO address, NO location.. with NO subject.. and NO message.. just, ALL blank.. sent to your inbox like a freakin' ghost.. seriously.. WOT THE FUCK ARE THEY!!?? sheeesh, it's enough to think I'm being tapped by the Echelon spy network or somethin'.. (maybe it's the Michael Jackson thing.. c'mon.. ADMIT it.. the alien recovered from the ROSWELL crash.. took up a pop career.. you know it.. I know it.. no point holding secrets..)
9. dunno if you've seen FARENHEIT 9/11 yet.. y'know.. that Michael Moore film.. (it's good, not his best tho'.. which is the brilliant BOWLING FOR COLUMBINE).. but there's this little tidbit.. this fact.. that really irked me.. and, no.. it wuzn't the oh-so-cool parallel made between current US foreign policy and George Orwell's 1984.. no, it was a little something else.. apparently SAUDI ARABIA owns 5% of the US stockmarket.. now, I may be blissfully naive.. perhaps a lot of other countries have similar shares and interests in the stock market.. or, maybe not.. but THIS bothers me.. SAUDI ARABIA, a cheerful little dictatorship with documented links to terrorism, public beheadings and the like (but hey, this is just your government.. not a reflection of the citizens.. hi guys, we like you.. no really, you got cool sand n camels n shit..).. they apparently hold 5% of the US stock market AAAND a shitload of oil reserves.. if the USA pisses them off, SAUDI ARABIA could simply PULL that money.. collapse the stock market.. and resultantly, throw world economy into chaos.. now.. is THIS why they invaded IRAQ instead.. coz, if they invaded the RIGHT country.. we'd be all fucked right about now? especially considering our RELIANCE ON FOSSIL FUELS!!??
yes.. I'm thru the looking glass here people..
seriously.. the truth is out there..
AVRIL LAVIGNE.. I'm onto you.. you ain't foolin' NOBODY with your SMS lyrics.. oh NO..
this may be my last transmission..
I think I know too much..
:: Spoz 4:36 AM |