:: Friday, August 08, 2003
I think I had one of those brief moments tonight..
a split second flash..
where, I suddenly became aware of the insignificance of my human life..
I saw the big picture..
I saw just how little a dot we all are..
almost like I was floatin' in the endless expanse of space..
and looking down to see the tiny prison we live in..
all these things we define as real..
we only define, thru our humanity..
that species limiting constant..
that controls everything we experience..
I know it's not a new thought..
not original by any stretch of the imagination..
I know others have casually thought this many times before..
"blah blah blah.. just an insignificant dot in the universe.. blah blah.. wot'ever!'
but it's damn weird.. to not just think it..
but, for a brief second.. actually SEE IT..
a bizarre flash of vivid realisation..
almost as shockin' as when you have one of those moments..
that reminds you of your impending mortality..
(those always keep me up at nights..)
coz, then I wondered..
if I'm trapped in this finite human existence..
this narrow vision..
yet, I have this awareness..
this sense that there must be more?
is it imagination?
is it all just figments?
is this experience of mine the start of the journey of consciousness..
do I later ascend to a higher plane?
am I at the end of my journey..
and do I just vaporize into nothingness?
or, am I just one frame.. in a series of frames..
an endless procession of lives, with one soul weaving thru them all..
in and out, endlessly.. worming thru all of creation, neuron connectivity on a grand scale?
does this soul of mine, that exists within the confines of my human shell..
live on in perpetuality?
does it remember it's future and former forms?
will I ever know more?
or is there no more, than wot our senses present us..
is the rest illusion?
are my senses lying to me?
is anything real?
as they say about the fictional matrix..
no one can tell you the meaning of life..
you must experience it for yourself..
so, I guess.. in moments like these these brief flashes of everything and the oblivion..
there is no answers..
once you experience it all, you don't need the answer..
you are the answer within and without yourself..
hmmm.. I'm feeling a yoda moment comin' on..
wot about you?
3:32AM freak out.. whoaaaaaaaaaa..
:: Spoz 3:36 AM |